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Washington Post: Cancel the Texas Rangers!
It’s not just the Redskins and the Indians anymore. An editor from the Washington Post wants the Texas Rangers canceled. No, not the law enforcement Texas Rangers. (Well yes, actually. Them too.) The baseball team.
The Rangers were set up by the Republic (later the State) of Texas to enforce the laws, including the laws supporting slavery. Therefore, the name has to go. The history is sound. The reasoning based on that history a little less so. Slavery was legal in Washington DC before Abraham Lincoln signed the DC Compensated Emancipation Act in 1862. It took a little longer to re-establish federal control over the State of Texas, but that happened too. However, feelings have been hurt, and we cannot allow hurt feelings.
But if we are going to start renaming teams, the Rangers are only the starting point. Long Island has Rangers; are we renaming them too? Piracy was intimately involved in the slave trade — there goes the Pirates, the Buccaneers, and the Raiders. Bad news for Michigan State too. The Spartans enslaved the Messenians; all the Messenians. The name has got to go. And Portland? Yeah, “Trail Blazers” brings to mind the early settlers who stole this entire continent from the original inhabitants. Shame on you for your implicit imperialism, Portland. Yankees (hated the world over), Sooners, Vikings, Patriots, Pioneers; so many problematic names that we should just rename the lot.
But now, we need new names. I’ve come up with a few.
The Snowflakes.
The Participation Trophy Recipients.
The Hair-Bun Wearing Man-Babies.
Do you have any suggestions?
I almost forgot. Guess the first name of the brave WaPo editor who has issued this demand. Go on. You can do it.
Published in Humor
Five years or so after the Bullets changed their name to the Wizards Doc Walker, ex-Redskin and great guy, was doing an interview. and it was pointed out to him that Washington’s basketball team is named after leaders of the Ku Klux Klan. Walker totally lost it. When he got it together he said, “I have had a race card right in front of me for all this time and totally missed it!” I never, ever heard of him actually playing these games. He gave respect to everyone.
Well that’s that. No more trips to Dallas for me.
In the end, they chose “Wizards” for the alliteration. The other finalist was the “Washington Kleagles.”
You’re not missing anything.
Fort Worth. Everything’s better in Fort Worth.
The Supplicaters
The Grifters
How have the Atlanta Braves been overlooked so far? A name more in keeping with their history would be the Atlanta Carpetbaggers.
Lone Wolf Gonzaullas could not be reached for comment.
This I do not find a bad suggestion. “Redtails” would work, too.
I’ve heard them mentioned in stories, along with the Kansas City Chiefs (although the Chicago Blackhawks seem to have been overlooked).
My response would be that there is no way in hell we’re going to pick a name in any way associated with Indians, because ten years from now you’ll be b****ing about it.
I think they should call them the Washington White Guys. Sure, lots of people will find it offensive, but I guarantee that the white guys won’t, and when non-white-guys complain we can yell racist.
I like it. On the other hand, has anyone suggested Washington Rednecks?
On this very site!
Weren’t they the Crackers once upon a time?
I looked it up. The Atlanta Crackers were the Atlanta-based minor league baseball teams between 1901 and 1965, when the Braves came to town.
How is Red Tail an injun term? I thought it had to do with Tuskegee, and it has nothing to do with Washington. Unless they’re referring to a hawk.
Why do sports teams need names? Just call them the Washington team.
After they removed a Confederate soldier’s memorial christened by FDR (among a frenzy of other attacks on Southern heritage), I wrote the city off.
But them, the Republican establishment in Texas (or pretty much any other state) isn’t much better, they just do the bidding of culturally progressive corporate donors instead of left-wing hate mobs (which amounts to the same thing, at different speeds).
Texas Rangers is outdated? Fine. Let’s update it: The Texas Frackers!
At this point I say lets just cancel all professional sports. They have all been overtaken by inane virtue signaling. Professional sports should be an escape from the stresses of everyday life. If it is now just another opportunity for leftists to pontificate. Than I am no longer interested in any of it
We have stopped all sports but NASCAR at our place. That one seems to be heading out also
Probably outdated, too.
Texas Rangers were originally the Washington Senators
They moved from DC to Texas and changed name to Rangers
The Senators!!
Now I’m offended.
And then they responded, “There’s only one riot.”
Can the Detroit Lions be cancelled? Or at least fed to the Christians?
Oh yeah, I want to go after all the animal names. These animals didn’t ask to have a football team named after them. They are proud, natural creatures who are way better than humans. How dare we?
I don’t care about the Lion’s name. They are just a horrible football team and organization that reflects poorly on football, Michigan, felines, & humanity.
https://thenationaltelegraph.com/sports-culture/canadas-inuit-defend-the-edmonton-eskimos-name
Can’t do it. It’s already owned by someone else. There’s a guy whose hobby is to copyright likely names for sports teams, and he’s already copyrighted every clever possibility for a new Washington name. The real name they choose will be something boring that he couldn’t guess.
Apologies I don’t have a citation, but I assure you it’s accurate. I assume you could DuckSearch for the article.