The Man America Is Waiting For…

 

Longing for the days when the Secret Service’s biggest worry was greasing up the Presidential bathtub, America is ready to embrace William Howard Taft Chris Christie and put him in the Oval Office. So thinks the man who closed down lanes on the Fort Lee side of the George Washington Bridge to create traffic jams into NYC and hit the Jersey beaches closed to the general public during a government shutdown. He has decided that he truly is a man of the people – whether the people want him or not.

The Big Guy – no, not that one – has thrown his straw boater into the ring. And because history doesn’t repeat but often rhymes, Chief Justice John Roberts had better beware, too.

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  1. davenr321 Coolidge
    davenr321
    @davenr321

    …the man who closed down lanes on the Fort Lee side of the George Washington Bridge to create traffic jams into NYC…

    is there a Latin phrase for heaping massive, fiery balls of excrement on politician’s heads? If so, it’s applicable to this Jersey Jerk. I’d seriously consider Dr. Cornell West first.

    • #31
  2. Fritz Coolidge
    Fritz
    @Fritz

    Steve C. (View Comment):

    Ekosj (View Comment):

    I don’t know if the story got national attention at the time, but back in the summer of 2017, amid a budget impasse, then Governor Christie closed nonessential State services. This included State Parks and beaches … over a sweltering 4th of July weekend. Standing firm on spending is good. Shutting people out of 4th of July at the beach…that’s bad. And … because he wasn’t done poking NJ voters in the eye yet … he took his own family to the NJ Governor’s summer house located at closed-to-everybody-else Island Beach State Park. There is a picture taken from overhead (drone? helo?) showing Chris Christie’s fat butt parked in a groaning beach chair with his family on an otherwise deserted beach enjoying the surf and the sun while the plebeians were denied access and sweated out the day at home.

    That one image is all that’s needed to forever deny high office to Christie. It’s like Mike Dukakis in the Spaceballs helmet.

    It wasn’t the helmet. A perfectly standard combat vehicle crewman’s helmet (CVC). It was the desperate attempt to butch it up by having Dukakis ride in a tank, complete with his full name emblazoned on the CVC (nobody does that!) and coveralls. I don’t think it’s as bad as John Kerry in full dress hunting gear showing up for the press with a dead goose in his hand.

    I liked the Kerry pic visiting NASA, emerging from an airlock in a full sterile suit,  and looking like a cartoon sperm cell. Heh.

    • #32
  3. Fritz Coolidge
    Fritz
    @Fritz

    Bishop Wash (View Comment):
    ago

    No, it wasn’t Rush. Kerry actually said that.

    • #33
  4. Columbo Inactive
    Columbo
    @Columbo

    Fritz (View Comment):

    Steve C. (View Comment):

    Ekosj (View Comment):

    I don’t know if the story got national attention at the time, but back in the summer of 2017, amid a budget impasse, then Governor Christie closed nonessential State services. This included State Parks and beaches … over a sweltering 4th of July weekend. Standing firm on spending is good. Shutting people out of 4th of July at the beach…that’s bad. And … because he wasn’t done poking NJ voters in the eye yet … he took his own family to the NJ Governor’s summer house located at closed-to-everybody-else Island Beach State Park. There is a picture taken from overhead (drone? helo?) showing Chris Christie’s fat butt parked in a groaning beach chair with his family on an otherwise deserted beach enjoying the surf and the sun while the plebeians were denied access and sweated out the day at home.

    That one image is all that’s needed to forever deny high office to Christie. It’s like Mike Dukakis in the Spaceballs helmet.

    It wasn’t the helmet. A perfectly standard combat vehicle crewman’s helmet (CVC). It was the desperate attempt to butch it up by having Dukakis ride in a tank, complete with his full name emblazoned on the CVC (nobody does that!) and coveralls. I don’t think it’s as bad as John Kerry in full dress hunting gear showing up for the press with a dead goose in his hand.

    I liked the Kerry pic visiting NASA, emerging from an airlock in a full sterile suit, and looking like a cartoon sperm cell. Heh.

    • #34
  5. Columbo Inactive
    Columbo
    @Columbo

    • #35
  6. Douglas Pratt Coolidge
    Douglas Pratt
    @DouglasPratt

    Fritz (View Comment):

    Steve C. (View Comment):

    Ekosj (View Comment):

    I don’t know if the story got national attention at the time, but back in the summer of 2017, amid a budget impasse, then Governor Christie closed nonessential State services. This included State Parks and beaches … over a sweltering 4th of July weekend. Standing firm on spending is good. Shutting people out of 4th of July at the beach…that’s bad. And … because he wasn’t done poking NJ voters in the eye yet … he took his own family to the NJ Governor’s summer house located at closed-to-everybody-else Island Beach State Park. There is a picture taken from overhead (drone? helo?) showing Chris Christie’s fat butt parked in a groaning beach chair with his family on an otherwise deserted beach enjoying the surf and the sun while the plebeians were denied access and sweated out the day at home.

    That one image is all that’s needed to forever deny high office to Christie. It’s like Mike Dukakis in the Spaceballs helmet.

    It wasn’t the helmet. A perfectly standard combat vehicle crewman’s helmet (CVC). It was the desperate attempt to butch it up by having Dukakis ride in a tank, complete with his full name emblazoned on the CVC (nobody does that!) and coveralls. I don’t think it’s as bad as John Kerry in full dress hunting gear showing up for the press with a dead goose in his hand.

    I liked the Kerry pic visiting NASA, emerging from an airlock in a full sterile suit, and looking like a cartoon sperm cell. Heh.

    He did look like Woody Allen in that movie…

    • #36
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