Drawing the Wrong Lessons – Bad Book Review Clickbait

 

Per some rather head-smackingly daft articles @titustechera has been bringing to my attention on Facebook (I’ll not link to them so as to spare the guilty), let’s have a game. The goal here is to come up with one or two sentence article titles on life lessons you can draw from classic or famous books or stories, but with a catch. You see, you must demonstrate that while your article title does indeed convey that the you may have read the story in question, you obviously did not understand it, and are instead trying to wring out whatever preconceived life lessons you think the story should have been about. Some starters are:

  • A Christmas Carol: How hard work, thrift, and personal sacrifice allow generous philanthropy in old age.
  • Wuthering Heights: How to stay true to yourself.
  • Game of Thrones: How your siblings can help you get ahead in life.
  • McTeague: How occupational licensing laws ruin lives.
  • The Great Gatsby: The evolution of automotive safety.
  • Tom Sawyer: How to leverage networking your friends to distribute workloads more evenly.
  • Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban: When to bring out your inner wolf to achieve success.

Have fun with this, and show no mercy to the ignorant.

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  1. Simon Templar Member
    Simon Templar
    @

    Desert Storm:  A Forgotten War  :  US Marines begin a multi-generational effort in support of modern day Persia’s urgent request to push Thailand to the number two spot as the world’s best brothel.

    • #121
  2. Nanda Panjandrum Member
    Nanda Panjandrum
    @

    Simon Templar (View Comment):

    Desert Storm: A Forgotten War : US Marines begin a multi-generational effort in support of modern day Persia’s urgent request to push Thailand to the number two spot as the world’s best brothel.

    Gracious sakes! Now, I *have to* check out this book. (Sounds like strategery to me.) :-)

    • #122
  3. Simon Templar Member
    Simon Templar
    @

    Nanda Panjandrum (View Comment):

    Simon Templar (View Comment):

    Desert Storm: A Forgotten War : US Marines begin a multi-generational effort in support of modern day Persia’s urgent request to push Thailand to the number two spot as the world’s best brothel.

    Gracious sakes! Now, I *have to* check out this book. (Sounds like strategery to me.) :-)

    See Winning the Piece:  Volume XII.  Chapter 24/7:  Foreign Area Officers in the attack!

    • #123
  4. Nanda Panjandrum Member
    Nanda Panjandrum
    @

    Simon Templar (View Comment):

    Nanda Panjandrum (View Comment):

    Simon Templar (View Comment):

    Desert Storm: A Forgotten War : US Marines begin a multi-generational effort in support of modern day Persia’s urgent request to push Thailand to the number two spot as the world’s best brothel.

    Gracious sakes! Now, I *have to* check out this book. (Sounds like strategery to me.) :-)

    See Winning the Piece: Volume XII. Chapter 24/7: Foreign Area Officers in the attack!

    I am so ready to read this…My life is so boring right now. Fay-O is just the thing to add some zing, yes? :-D

    • #124
  5. Joker Member
    Joker
    @Joker

    Madam Bovary – Aging archery champion gets her groove back and earns big coin.

    Catcher in the Rye – Insolent battery mate finds love in granary.

    War and Peace – Duh 

    • #125
  6. Boss Mongo Member
    Boss Mongo
    @BossMongo

    Great Expectations:  Young or old, all chicks are crazy.

    • #126
  7. Hank Rhody, Red Hunter Contributor
    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter
    @HankRhody

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Great Expectations: Young or old, all chicks are crazy.

    King Solomon’s Mines: Continue to never trust women.

    • #127
  8. C. U. Douglas Coolidge
    C. U. Douglas
    @CUDouglas

    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter (View Comment):

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Great Expectations: Young or old, all chicks are crazy.

    King Solomon’s Mines: Continue to never trust women.

    She: Seriously. We’re not kidding.

    • #128
  9. Hank Rhody, Red Hunter Contributor
    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter
    @HankRhody

    A couple years back I reread King Solomon’s Mines. Later, listening to the recording of a Supreme Court argument, when Ruth Bader Ginsburg spoke up I thought to myself “That’s exactly how I imagine Gagool speaking.”

    • #129
  10. SkipSul Inactive
    SkipSul
    @skipsul

    C. U. Douglas (View Comment):

    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter (View Comment):

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Great Expectations: Young or old, all chicks are crazy.

    King Solomon’s Mines: Continue to never trust women.

    She: Seriously. We’re not kidding.

    All About Eve: What, the first 3 warnings didn’t take?

    • #130
  11. Judge Mental Member
    Judge Mental
    @JudgeMental

    The Bible – Part 1 is old-school violence, death, and destruction.  Part 2 is all hippy-dippy peace, love and understanding.  Needs a third act.

    • #131
  12. Boss Mongo Member
    Boss Mongo
    @BossMongo

    The Bible, Part III– Ya’ll brought this on yourselves.

    • #132
  13. SkipSul Inactive
    SkipSul
    @skipsul

    SkipSul (View Comment):

    C. U. Douglas (View Comment):

    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter (View Comment):

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Great Expectations: Young or old, all chicks are crazy.

    King Solomon’s Mines: Continue to never trust women.

    She: Seriously. We’re not kidding.

    All About Eve: What, the first 3 warnings didn’t take?

    Anne of Green Gables: Nope, still don’t trust ’em.

    • #133
  14. Guruforhire Inactive
    Guruforhire
    @Guruforhire

    To Kill a Mockingbird:  Trust your life to a backwoods country lawyer.

    • #134
  15. Judge Mental Member
    Judge Mental
    @JudgeMental

    Guruforhire (View Comment):

    To Kill a Mockingbird: Trust your life to a backwoods country lawyer.

    Nicely done.

    • #135
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