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Maybe People Are OK, After All…
Our fellow American citizens have not been on their best behavior recently. Those who look for the positive side of human nature have certainly been struggling this year. People seem mean. The rioters in cities across the country seem intent on destroying just for the sake of destruction. I get dirty looks in the grocery store if my obediently worn mask does not adequately cover my nose. Those who disagree on anything are often unwilling even to speak to one another, viewing everyone else as evil rather than simply holding a different perspective. If I were to attempt to convince you of the beauty of human nature right now, I would surely fail. But let me try.
In my line of work, I often work with patients who are dying. When I tell someone that I have found a disease that I can’t fix, and that their time here on earth is limited, you would think that they would immediately regress into bitter selfishness: “All those people get to go out partying tonight, without a care in the world. While I have chemo in the morning, and I will feel horrible, until I die. This is not fair.
I don’t think that any of us would begrudge a terminally ill person a few thoughts like this, from time to time. That would make sense. And I do see that response in some unfortunate individuals. Sometimes. But not usually. Usually, I see something different. Something unexpected.
I have a patient (“Mr. Smith”) who came to me for a series of odd neurological issues. Long story short, I eventually figured out that he had ALS – Lou Gehrig’s disease. His weakness will gradually progress, until he will be an invalid, and then things get really hard, until he dies. Some specialists and I might be able to slow his decline, but the outcome, unfortunately, is as certain as anything can be in my line of work. His prognosis is grim.
I figured all this out one Friday night and didn’t want him to have to wait all weekend to find out what was happening. I invited him over to my house for a drink, so I could explain everything in a less threatening environment than a doctor’s office. My dog comes limping over to say hello to our guest. Mr. Smith asked why he was limping. I explained that my dog had a cancer which was inoperable, and he was losing the use of his front leg. We are giving him lots of treats, and making sure he’s comfortable, for as long as we can. But his prognosis is grim.
Mr. Smith was upset. Every time I see Mr. Smith in the office now, he always asks about my dog. Mr. Smith has enough problems of his own. But he’s genuinely concerned about a dog. He even made a special trip to my house to give my dog some steak scraps the other day. Mr. Smith teared up and smiled as my dog eagerly wolfed down the meat in just a few bites.
I had another patient last year (“Mr. Jones”) who is a retired CEO of a major petroleum company – you fill up your car with gas at his company’s gas stations all the time. He has his own Gulfstream jet. He’s only in his late 60s, and in great health. But he developed what he thought were gall stones. I found pancreatic cancer.
In our conversations, I always tried to spend at least some time talking about something other than medicine. He asked once about my family. I mentioned that my daughter was looking for a job, and he was so helpful. He gave her tips on how to get in front of the right people, he spent hours on the phone with her teaching her about the corporate world, and called on his contacts to help her find work. As it worked out, she found work elsewhere eventually, but he was so, so generous with his time. Even though he knew that time was one thing of which he had a short supply.
The last time I saw him, he was extremely ill. He ended up dying later that night. In his last words to me, he asked if my daughter had found a job. I said no, but she had a few leads. He asked me to remind her to follow up on a lead he had given her. And then he died a few hours later.
Surely he had more important things on his mind, as he was about to die. But no, he didn’t. He was more interested in helping out some kid. Just like Mr. Smith seems more interested in my dog than his own problems.
When you remove all the stresses, commitments, and petty crap we focus on every day, most people out there – deep down, under all the crap – most people are fine human beings. Not all. But most.
I’ve written in the past about how I generally take a very dim view of human nature. But it seems that when you dig down past all the nature, and get to the actual human, most of them are good people. Better than I give them credit for. And the fewer pressures and complications those people have in their lives, the better people they seem to become. Usually.
Maybe our founding fathers were on to something. If you leave people alone and grant them the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, they’ll often surprise you with their virtue and compassion. Whereas the bigger government gets, the more requirements and petty crap you put in front of them, and people feel that they’re losing control over their lives, they become more vindictive and selfish.
Perhaps the government’s very efforts to help people with their daily needs, make them increasingly incapable of caring for their daily needs and caring for their neighbors.
The more government attempts to protect us from the negative aspects of human nature, the more negative human nature becomes.
When people are free, they are virtuous and compassionate. When they lose their freedom — either to strong central government, Islamic culture, or even just the stresses of a difficult life — they often become more heartless and vindictive. The song “Live Like You Are Dying” does a nice job of explaining the liberating effects of a terminal diagnosis, and how it tends to make one more compassionate rather than more selfish.
So maybe people really are ok, after all. Maybe we can’t make them better, no matter how much we want to. Maybe our government’s compassionate efforts to help people with their daily lives, in exchange for giving up a bit of their freedoms, are creating worse people that what we started with. People who are likely to need more help from government.
And eventually, you end up with people who are likely to express their disappointment in not qualifying for more lucrative employment by burning down an auto parts store.
Maybe, upon further reflection, it would be wise to just leave them alone, as much as possible. Because when they’re free, people really are ok, after all.
And the more government attempts to protect us from the negative aspects of human nature, the more negative human nature becomes.
Published in General
This is really wonderful. I’m hoping for like votes to main feed so I can share it beyond Ricochet.
Doc- you write such eloquent and intimate stories about people you love. I am almost always moved deeply. This one moved me again. I know the people you write about. I believe most people become more of who they have always been when they age or approach death. Your CEO was always a generous person and wanted to continue living that life. Every moment is precious and filled with God’s grace to those who are open to it. And freedom and liberty are foundational to that Grace. All is possible with it. Nothing is possible without liberty. Thank you for writing and being so unselfconsciously open. Thank you.
Very powerful, and encouraging. Thank you, Doc.
Doc, thank you for a deep insight so beautifully expressed.
I’m not sure about the “people are OK” part, but yes, I have noticed for many years that the more government does for people, the harder it is to teach (especially to our children) the second great commandment – to love our neighbor. Too often I get a response along the lines of, “I don’t need to. There’s a government program to [feed, clothe, medically treat, counsel, etc.] them.” Or the response to a need is that the solution should be provided by a government program, paid for by taxes, which taxes are preferably paid by someone else, so I can pretend to be loving when in fact I have outsource it so that the someone else is doing the “loving” on my behalf.
The more history I read, the more I think that humans were made for suffering. This meme is rather similar to the Kali Yuga from Hindu philosophy,
Black-Americans, Native-Americans and Japanese-Americans in WII were so conspicuously in America’s wars that even the Scotch-Irish were impressed. If those groups weren’t being treated indecently, they wouldn’t have been as brave. In Ricochet after the George Floyd incident and the idiotic riots that followed, the writing got better. I must admit to feeling intimidated at the quality on Ricochet. If Victor Frankl had not experienced the Holocaust his writing would not have been as worth reading.
I am no Doctor. In fact, I view humans as alien. But constantly, the best of humanity is revealed in suffering and injustice. Your patients are nice on their death bed because of suffering, not in spite of it.
Henry,
As I was writing this piece, I was wondering how you would respond to it. I suspected that your response would include a reference to Solzhenitsyn. I suspect that he would take a very different view than what I presented.
How do you think he would have responded to my rosy presentation of human nature?
And by the way, I concede that you may have a point. Great response.
May we all have the attitude your patients did.
Your examples are of people knowing that they are nearing the end of their lives, and of people who have led a successful lives, especially the CEO.
But it doesn’t mean they weren’t mean or more judgmental when they were younger, and were more apt to be mean in their youth.
I certainly find myself being kinder as I age, and remember how mean I could be when I was younger.
That’s not unusual.
Rush. Limbaugh. Diagnosed with stage four lung cancer. Showing up for a grueling three- hour radio show most days. He did say that he really did not appreciate how grueling his daily routine was until he got sick.
Interesting observation, one I hadn’t thought of before.
A brilliant and beautiful post.
George Will, The Conservative Sensibility, p. 527:
Freedom is insufficient. Humans don’t naturally become good if you give them freedom. They must be made good and then given freedom. Though it is not factually true, the story of Cain and Abel is among the truest stories that human beings have ever created. When humans are given freedom, they destroy each other if they are not good.
I would like to help confirm Dr. Bastiat”s hypothesis, namely, “when daily life is superseded , humans become more human.” Is that a fair summary?
I belong to a modest yacht club. (Dues $200 per year, initiation fee $300). The value of the boats range from $3000 to $500,000. One of the main attractions of our interest in boats, is an escape from the issues of daily life. Few people talk about their life at home, ( the exception is grandchildren). Talk about work is verboten.
Within the club, the trustees are responsible for janitorial services, making sure the glassware matches, the theme of the next party, and ensuring that the beer refrigerator is making money. This leaves the membership to be concerned about other issues, namely charitable activities. Much of our focus is the local hospice organization, the local veteran’s home, and , because we have a member who had a family member who suffered from drug addiction and, eventual suicide, we direct much time and money in their foundation.
Does this anecdote make sense to you? Have you seen other examples? Does it reinforce Dr Bastiat”s theory?
Yup. Definitely gotten more understanding and empathetic in my later years. Makes me feel better, too.
(Yes, I’m a boomer, it’s all about me!)
I am by vocation a confessional Lutheran pastor. Lutheran theology, the theology of the reformation is sometimes called, “The Theology of the Cross.” It is in suffering that God accomplishes His work in us and in the world. Foremost on the cross, then in the lives of His people. Dr. Bastiat, I am a newbie to Ricochet and quickly becoming a fan of both the platform and your thoughtful musings.
Welcome, Rev. Craig!
Rev Craig,
Thanks so much, and welcome to the zoo!
I have never met a mean Lutheran.
Every Lutheran I’ve met has been kind and polite. Like Quakers.
We mean Lutherans are sneaky, too.
I think at least 50% of the country isn’t insane.
These folks are mostly quiet.
They believe in free speech but don’t own a megaphone.
They believe in 2nd amendment but don’t brandish their light sabres.
They believe in 1776 and 1789.
They do not believe in 1619.
They believe America is a great but imperfect nation, an imperfect nation that is self critical and trying to improve itself.
One pearl of medical wisdom that has stayed with me for over 40 years ago came when I was a naive bumbling pediatric resident. The attending oncology professor said : Never be afraid to discuss death or ask your young patient what he or she is afraid of. If the conversation gets too uncomfortable for you they will recognize it and always let you off the hook.
So true.
I should clarify. The wise professor was actually saying don’t be afraid to be involved in any emotionally stressful conversation because kids will always let you off the hook. I don’t think he wanted residents to start asking about attitudes about death.
I wish that had been my experience, but when you meet a real one, they tend to be good people.
If nothing else, people surprise. I’ve studied them and I’m constantly amazed. One thing is certain in my observation. People who are idle are prone to self-distructive habits, anti-social behavior, fractious outbursts and elevated notions of their worth and opinion. When the idle gather, this tendency multiplies, not quite exponentially, but the issue is magnified. So humans need real responsibility and purpose, they need to work and achieve, so that they don’t backslide into self possession.
If there were a Post of the Month Contest, this one would win it. Thank you for writing it, Dr. Bastiat.
@GrannyDude has talked about this, in relation to her duty as a pastor who has had to tell people about the death of a family member. This isn’t a quote but her advice is that you have to be straightforward. Don’t dance around the reality by using euphemisms.
I wouldn’t say you’re restored my faith in humanity, but you certainly have lifted it a bit.
Great job as usual, Doc.
I wrote a post that piggy backed off of this one. Despite myself, it continues with the positive outlook. Along with Dr. Basiat, there were lesser references to Willie Nelson and Camus.
When we were raising the kids, and I looked around and saw that most people are fine human beings, almost regardless of how they were raised, it comforted me a lot.