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Why It’s Hard to Be a Conservative
Is it difficult to be a conservative? That’s the question I was asking myself this morning. It seemed like an odd question, like some hidden part of me invading my psyche and challenging me to look at the truth.
The question seems strange because it’s like asking myself if it’s hard to breathe, or if it’s hard to exercise regularly — uh, well, no that one really is hard. But then I realized there are, for me, responsibilities, limitations, and even difficulties with my wearing the conservative mantle. (Many of you may choose to substitute “conservative” with “Republican,” because they are similar, but in certain cases, the distinction matters.)
It’s also one thing to hold certain values, but to practice them and own up to them can be something quite different and awkward. Conservative values, after all, don’t include moral relativism, nurtured emotion, distortions, and lies. It calls us to be upright citizens, to honor the Constitution, morality, and truth.
So when is it hard for me to be a conservative? When I’m dealing with people who aren’t conservative, or who don’t know what they are. Or when I’m with a person who defines conservatism differently than I do. You could say that we conservatives are not creating the dissension, but our holding to our beliefs with determination and commitment certainly contributes to the strain in relationships.
It’s hard to be a conservative when I have to limit the ideas I discuss with others: we can’t talk about values, laws, customs, or culture because none of those areas is free of politics anymore. As a person who is curious, eager to learn, and friendly, conservativism requires me to be discerning about whom I share with. That means a relationship with a person I disagree with has built-in roadblocks. I don’t like that fact.
But I’m committed to being a conservative, to honoring and living my values. I also value harmonious relationships with friends and family. So, estrangement, whether I like it or not, is part of the equation.
It’s just hard sometimes to be a conservative.
Published in Politics
Agree. How does a person who preaches ‘be yourself, if it feels good do it’ also believe in socialism and government control of everything? How do you preach ‘diversity’ then demand speech codes and shunning of conservatives and the religious?
Feelings. That’s how. Its not hypocritical if you feel it is right! Don’t judge me, man. But boy, are YOU evil!
Part of being conservative is being reluctant to accept the authority and consensus of others. Consensus means nothing to us. To consensus we say, so what? That being said, many conservatives willingly accept consensus and authority when it comes to faith. We love faith tradition; it may be entirely irrational, but it makes us happy and provides reason and purpose beyond time. Faith is mute on any progression in human endeavor; rather, it informs ones personal journey in life. So as contrarian as conservatives may be in accepting the authority and consensus of other people, most are eager to accept the tenets and mores of traditional faith. Likewise, we can accept the authority of government but with reluctance and limitation. We agree to abide by its rules and regulations so long as government stays are within limits we impose. Government is not some abstract entity. It is our construct and subject to our consent.
On the other hand, people are constantly barraged with authority, rules and the wills of those with the power to praise or punish. This is hell for a natural conservative who must quietly resist. Non-conservatives can see and sense our reluctance and they wonder why we resist. We remain attached to old ideas, social constructs, tradition, faith based mores. The world, the authorities say, can be re-engineered, if we just follow along, evil can be good, wrong can be right, and all injustices historical or conceived can be purged along with guilt. This is, they tell us, the progression and the transcendence of humankind. Those who follow see conservatives as the enemy of progress. It is their job to diminish, dismiss and alienate us, and that makes us miserable.
These followers cannot see what we see nor understand what we understand. Wrong, evil and injustice have no remedy but forgiveness and love. Progress is subject not to loyalty, but to liberty. And government is of the people, by the people and for the people; without their consent, it is nothing.
It’s not all that hard to think like a conservative. It only requires that you learn to laugh at the leftists. Because they are clowns, and you laugh at clowns, right? They may be perfectly lovely and intelligent people in other ways, but their political beliefs are laughable, and so you laugh at them. Not out loud. That wouldn’t be particularly civil. But inside you laugh.
Behaving like a conservative is more difficult. But the rewards are greater. Hard work, deferred gratification, and adhering to whatever duties you have assumed – these are difficult and require sacrifice. But the rewards are self-respect and, frequently, material wealth.
Hard to be a conservative? All things considered, I would find it harder to be a leftist.
Ralphie, I agree with all you say except this one. I desperately want to be understood, even if I’m not appreciated. Maybe I’m missing something?
@dougkimball, not sure I understand the bolded part. There are many conservatives on this site who don’t “willing accept faith”; they call themselves agnostics or atheists. I know that I don’t have an expectation that people accept a faith, as long as they behave in a moral way. I also judge people on their actions, so what they believe is interesting to me, but not relevant. You can have all kinds of faith and be a jerk!
@larry3435, you and @oldbathos have both suggested having a sense of humor about the Left. I don’t think I’m a humorless person, but I don’t see the humor watching people who live lives of delusion and irrationality, even if they don’t realize it. And of course, there’s the effect they have on society. Maybe I am humorless . . .
I do love this point, though.
Being a conservative is hard because one must constantly fight an uphill battle against the MSM, popular culture, and the leftist-infiltrated educational system. Our entire population is constantly being bombarded with “conservatives are evil” messages in our newspapers, newscasts, television shows, movies, music, and now sports. Oftentimes I feel as though I am standing on the shore watching a gigantic tidal wave approaching with my arms outstretched and yelling, “STOP!”
from @israelp :
I’m one of those people! One can accept the commandments, mores and ethics, the lessons of faith, without accepting the more abstract and mystical aspects of faith. For example, I love the idea of taking a day to ponder and atone for ones transgressions in the prior year. That does not make me Jewish, but I accept the idea of sin, guilt and atonement. Think of it this way, must one accept the fact that Jesus walked on water or rose from the dead to accept His teachings on charity and forgiveness? One can accept “Faith” that is Judeo-Christian tradition without taking the leap into resurrection, transubstantiation, miracle and heaven.
Well, I think you’re the exception, Doug. Are you sure you’re not a Jew? You’d make a really good one. ;-)
Duplicate, my apologies.
A faithful Calvinist would say you should use the gifts you have to glorify G-d and be the earnest hands and feet of G-d as you seek to help others. Whether you got paid to do this is irrelevant. Being productive is using what G-d gave to pursue His will as you understand it.
You are right, many in the Church have picked up on other themes and forgotten or ignored what the Scriptures say. If you have no children or many children you can pursue the work of G-d with gifts of G-d.
But conservatives aren’t reluctant to accept the authority and consensus of others. They just prefer authority and consensus which has stood the test of time. For example, conservatives are more likely, not less, to believe parents should exercise authority over their children, and that if you don’t accept the authority of your boss, you haven’t got grounds for complaint if you get fired. Authority of parent over child is as old as civilization itself, if not older. Likewise, the boss-employee or master-servant relationship.
American equality disdains servility, so American conservatives bristle at master-servant language, unless the “master” named is God. But religion is not some weird exception to American conservatives’ antiauthoritarian tendencies. That we don’t respect the authorities lately in ascendance doesn’t mean we don’t respect authority.
I don’t think you’re humorless, Susan. It’s just that there are some situations in life where your only choices are to laugh or to cry. I prefer laughter. As I mentioned to you on another thread, trying to change the leftists’ minds is nearly hopeless and not worth the effort. C’mon, admit it – that’s pretty funny.
It is a religious belief for them – their leftism. It is immune to facts or reason. Sometimes, eventually, a few of them do get it. If you must try to get through to them, recommend that they read David Mamet’s article Why I Am No Longer A Brain-Dead Liberal. As Mamet told his lefty former-friends, “I began reading not only the economics of Thomas Sowell (our greatest contemporary philosopher) but Milton Friedman, Paul Johnson and Shelby Steele, and a host of conservative writers, and found that I agreed with them: a free-market understanding of the world meshes more perfectly with my experience than that idealistic vision I called liberalism.” Of course, Mamet didn’t get through to them either, so what chance do you have?
I disagree. We accept the authority of a boss or a teacher because we must to a certain degree, but not because we are inclined to do so. Sure, we respect the authority a parent has over a child, but if that parent is a loathsome idiot, we sure feel sorry for the kid. I stand by my statement. A person can earn my respect, but authority triggers a natural skepticism.
As far as I’m concerned, accepting authority because we must is still accepting it.
Conservatives are inclined to accept what we must accept, it’s what we do. It’s what we say distinguishes us from the left – that the left childishly does not accept what it must.
You are correct, of course. Respecting authority is not the same as accepting it hook, line and sinker!
In fact, we don’t have to respect the authority; we only need to act like we do!
The difficulty of navigating friendships with progressives is the hardest thing about being conservative, although handling progressives at work is similarly challenging. I always assume my neighbors and friends are progressive, until I find out otherwise. I’m always happy to know them and find lots of common ground based on our shared interests or similar phase of life. Still, I am continually stymied when the conversation gets political and I just want to avoid it. I do think humor is the way to go, but I need to have better responses at the ready. Conversations with acquaintances can be a mine-field. I was actually talking to a fellow mom about summer plans and she snidely started in about how it would be an unbearably hot summer since Trump pulled out of the Paris Climate Accord. I don’t know what else to say to that except, “you can’t be serious?!”
That sounds like an excellent response to me, @whit. I don’t feel inclined to use humor; by the time I’m ready to respond, I’m probably already annoyed. Not only that, timing is everything; if the person is snarky, humor could backfire.
Otherwise, I respond pretty much as you do. Minefields, otherwise.