Ricochet is the best place on the internet to discuss the issues of the day, either through commenting on posts or writing your own for our active and dynamic community in a fully moderated environment. In addition, the Ricochet Audio Network offers over 50 original podcasts with new episodes released every day.
Summer’s Bustin’ Out All Over
Ah, the first day of summer. And, if you’re a larger-busted woman, the first day of a season not really designed with you in mind. Even if you’re not big-busted, just older, or physically odd in some way, finding attractive but modest summer clothing whose modesty doesn’t draw too much attention to itself can be tough.
High-riding bands and pit-cleavage.
There are many causes of bustiness. One is just being heavier. Others are busty even at lower BMIs, and may spend most of their lives trying to wrangle themselves into normal-size clothing, which, especially during sleeveless season can lead to unfortunate spillover effects. Many women already wear the wrong size bra, causing not only discomfort, but needless dowdiness. At least during colder seasons, a dowdy bustline is more covered up. Not so in summer, when high-riding bands and pit-cleavage can escape the confines of clothing for the world to see.
The solution may be as easy as checking to see whether you’re wearing the right size bra. Even clerks at boutique bra stores who really should know better may lowball cup size and highball band size on bustier women just to match what they have in stock. Fortunately, it’s not so hard to measure yourself at home. Bustier women who have some sewing skills may even be able to alter more commonly-available bra sizes to fit, and save some dough. I’ve done this alteration, and it works, though my seams don’t lie completely flat (the secret of the alteration is going wayyyy up in band size to give yourself room to take in).
If bra shopping is an exquisite feminine hell, swimsuit shopping may be even worse. Many of us have reasons to look for more modest swimwear, especially as we age. Not everyone is comfortable showing off their cellulite, stretch marks, or sagging flesh; nor is merely staying thin a guarantee of avoiding these blemishes: thin or fat, our body’s collagen weakens as we age (or, like me, you could just be born with congenitally weak cartilage).
Olympic-style swimsuits
Olympic athletes wear fairly full-coverage swimsuits – at a fairly full-coverage price (hundreds of dollars)! The coverage and compression of those suits can be simulated at less cost by pairing a legless racing swimsuit (I use Tyr) with a pair of men’s knee-length Speedos. For those who wish to cover their arms as well, knee-to-elbow one-pieces sold as “sun protection” swimwear, often for “surfing and snorkeling”, work well, too (there are also models that cover wrist to ankle). These solutions are highly functional, but not particularly “girly”, especially if you’d rather not turn your potatoes into pancakes, if you know what I mean.
L: elbow to knee suit; R: legless suit & Speedo
Swimwear with built-in bras is supposed to do better than squashing your chest flat. But even this is subject to pitfalls for bustier women – sometimes literal “pitfall”, if bustage escapes confinement to give you that lovely pit-cleavage. Sometimes, you get lucky, and find bra-sized swimwear that indeed matches the bra size it claims to match. Other times, there’s nothing for it but to take matters into your own hands – and I don’t mean spending your day at the beach uplifting your mammaries manually. Rather, I mean, sewing a bra that actually fits you into your swimsuit. The good news for small-banded, large-cupped women is that band size doesn’t matter for these projects, meaning you can use whichever size bra (be the band ever so huge) whose cups alone fit.
Theoretically beautiful swimdress. Frowny face indeed!
Right after I had my first kid, I wasn’t just larger-busted than I’d ever been, but also considerably heftier. That’s when I bought my first knee-to-elbow swimsuit. I also, in a sort of forlorn hope, ordered an inexpensive swimdress that at least looked good in theory. When the swimdress arrived, though, it gave me quite a frowny face. The built-in bra contained maybe a quarter of what it should have. I don’t even want to describe what it looked like: it wasn’t pretty. I was able to cut the built-in bra out and substitute one of my own – or rather, substitute a cheap bra whose band (which I didn’t need) was way too big, but whose cups actually fit. Here are some pictures of the project:
Oh, look! A halter top!
I’ve mentioned pit-cleavage a fair few times by now. One thing I’ve noticed in my various fashion misadventures is that, if you’re a woman prone to pit-cleavage, a halter top, which applies force along a strap going up and in toward the neck, rather than up and out toward the armpit, is sometimes all you need to de-cleavify those pits. Another thing: Plus-size models are still… models.
Even more robust halter top.
They might be zaftig, but they’re perky. And whatever perk nature hasn’t supplied, Photoshop can. As a sag-sack myself, even when I was a skinny teen, fuller-figured women with antigrav adipose strangely fascinate me. I remember encountering one Rubenesque young thing in a string bikini at a swimming hole once – completely flawless skin. Not a striation or dimple to be seen. It was a wonder of nature, I tell you!
But most of us will not be so blessed. As shown in the photo of my postpartum swimdress project, leggings extending below the knee are fine to swim in, too. They make special leggings for swimming, but non-swimming leggings will work if you’re OK with them wearing out fast. If you’re a swimdress sort of lady, or would be, if swimdresses covered your legs better, leggings go about as well with swimdresses as tights go with real dresses.
These days, it seems there are more options than every for less-skimpy swimwear. This is great news for those of us who love to swim, but who don’t love showing all we’ve got to all and sundry. After all, for many of us, modesty and vanity aren’t exactly opposites. What are your favorite tips for keeping cool in the summer heat without revealing too much?
Published in Humor
I can’t believe there’s 15 people following this post and most of them are men,,,,,too much!
?
Like a well fitting bra.
Do more fashion posts, midge. This was helpful.
Wow. That’s just bad.
Gentlemen, pretend to not read:
Like almost all women, I am naturally slightly assymetrical. That was compounded by a lumpectomy. Now, maybe it’s one of those things that I notice more than anyone else would, but it’s a big reason I’m Team Bandeau Tops (and not those foolish ones that twist in the middle) or Team Generally Modest.
The swimdress I had to sew my own bra into is the first swimwear to take me off Team Uniboob ever since puberty kicked me off Team Nullboob.
Thanks! More fashion posts?… Might have to bribe @rightangles into ghostwriting for me…
Oh ha. I have to ask my daughter what’s cool now. I told her recently “I used to be cool! I swear!” and she said, “I know, Mom, I know.”
I don’t for a second believe that you can’t believe it.
Here in Tucson, we stay inside, preferably in front of the AC vent. :)
Ditto for Texas
About the swearing, or the coolness?
Walk around naked while keeping your mouth shut?
I love ruining dreams. It’s a favorite past-time of mine. :D
That’s exactly why I generally wear a bra underneath. :P
As if we needed more proof that men see things differently from us.
Yeah. I hear women only think about sex three or four times a day.
Bust a move!
Or the captain of the football team. Hit em high hit em low – go go go!
I can’t believe I’ve followed for this long with so few pictorial examples.
Oops, I forgot we’re on the main feed. Sorry!
I have spent very little time in the Southern U.S., but was there briefly while driving around the country. We were in Death Valley, in a truck with broken AC, and we we were in some little town. I saw a sign advertising a pool, and it only cost 1 dollar to swim in it! Yay! We jumped out of the truck, paid our dollar, changed into our swim suits, and jumped into the pool: the temperature of that water was at least 100 degrees. It was such an epic disappointment.
Is it always that way with pools in the Southwest? I know there are ways to heat a pool, surely there must be ways to keep the water cool, right? Genuine question- I don’t know.
Ok, I googled it :) Apparently, there are devices that cool the temperature of a pool, but according to my very brief google search, the best you can hope for is a ten or 15 degree drop in temperature? Wow. I don’t think that would have helped much that day in Death Valley.
As someone who has lived North all my life, I am so accustomed to swimming in freezing cold water that swimming in warm water just seems wrong, somehow. :)
I know! It was weird for me at first when I came here from the Midwest. I don’t even have a pool heater in this house, though I did at my last one. I really don’t need it. But the water still feels refreshing in the morning or at bedtime, and anyway you do not want to be outside in the heat of the day around here.
I’m going to try that right now. I’ll let you know how it works out once I get back from the park.
We’ll bring you a cake with a file baked in it.
We are always supportive of women’s breasts. We are here to lend a hand or two when needed.
Late to the party…there is a line of fun, retro suits designed by Esther Williams…lots more structure to them.
Photos of actual women wearing the suits…all shapes and sizes.
Our school had some loaner swimsuits that looked a bit like that.
“No, no, don’t be silly. How can you find someone not Esther Williams?”
Great practical post!
And I love the term, theoretically beautiful. There are far too many theoretically beautiful articles of clothing in the stores.
I still don’t know what pit cleavage is. I never realized having breasts was that complicated. ;- )
LOL, I was thinking the same thing.