The Wrong Side of Morality

 

Many of my friends are very happy about Friday’s US Supreme Court decision. While I have mixed feelings, I realize that many of them are driven by great love and respect for other people, their dignity, their equality, and their love. And perhaps they’re right to celebrate the Supreme Court’s expansion of the definition of marriage.

A small minority of them, however, undermine their claim to be driven by love and respect when they lash out in hatred, anger, and derisive mockery at Supreme Court justices, or at others who do not share their views. If you write or like a post that calls Justice Thomas a highly unpleasant expletive, for example, the emotion driving you does not seem to be love, and the values guiding you do not seem to be respect or tolerance.

The moral line dividing us does not run between those who think that marriage and dignity are Constitutionally-protected rights and those that think these are issues for Congress or state legislatures. It does not run between those who think the opposite-gender clause must remain in the definition of marriage and those who think it must be removed. The moral line runs within us, between those parts of us that are driven by anger, bigotry, intolerance, and hate, and those that are driven by love and respect for other people, their orientations, and their opinions.

Wherever one stands on the issue, the part of us that wants to mock or condemn the justices who disagreed with us on Friday is probably on the wrong side of that moral line. We should worry less about being on the wrong side of history than about being on the wrong side of morality and human decency.

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  1. DrewInWisconsin Member
    DrewInWisconsin
    @DrewInWisconsin

    Mike Rapkoch:Do we really think terms like “useful idiots’ get us anywhere?

    As long as we’re using them historically correctly.

    • #91
  2. DrewInWisconsin Member
    DrewInWisconsin
    @DrewInWisconsin

    Red Feline:

    DrewInWisconsin:

    Indaba: I think most men on Ricochet think pornography is fine for them to view and they have not turnd into rapists or sex maniacs.

    Wait, what? Did someone do a poll? I agree that porn has been mainstreamed (even as long ago as the TV show “Friends” on which porn was a regular topic) . . . but what would make you think that “most men on Ricochet think pornography is fine”?

    I wouldn’t go there, Drew! Indaba thinks ALL men like pornography. I wouldn’t probe for her opinion of men on that subject. Just a wee warning! :)

    Well, it’s kind of a slanderous thing to say about Ricochet men.

    • #92
  3. Herbert Woodbery Member
    Herbert Woodbery
    @Herbert

    ((As long as we’re using them historically correctly.)))

    Nope, check out its usage. Personal attack against a member.

    • #93
  4. user_554634 Member
    user_554634
    @MikeRapkoch

    DrewInWisconsin:

    Mike Rapkoch:Do we really think terms like “useful idiots’ get us anywhere?

    As long as we’re using them historically correctly.

    Sure. And as long as we do not personalize, as Herbert notes.

    • #94
  5. Ball Diamond Ball Member
    Ball Diamond Ball
    @BallDiamondBall

    Careful.  Herb hasn’t gotten his prog love on yet, and he’s a-lawyerin up!

    • #95
  6. She Member
    She
    @She

    Knotwise the Poet:

    And so on and so forth. Remember, if you love people you MUST also agree with and endorse their lifestyle and beliefs. Otherwise, well, skip to 3:10 on this clip for a special message to y’all.

    Without getting into the weeds of a theological, historical and semantic discussion, which I’m not qualified to do on the one hand, and while slightly more qualified on the other, I’m just not up for it, this is why I have always preferred the triumvirate of ‘faith, hope and charity,’ as distinct from ‘faith, hope and love.’

    Because the word ‘love’ just has too much emotional baggage, and discussions of this sort usually end up with one or both sides sounding like the screaming girl in the video clip.

    I can feel charitable towards many people that I do not ‘love,’ and I believe it’s possible (and even required) to think, and act, in Christian charity towards them (if I’m a Christian) even if I do not like what they say or what they do, whether it directly affects me or not.  But I do not ‘love’ these people. It’s not personal.

    Why is it no longer acceptable to make that sort of distinction, or to have a viewpoint like that?

    • #96
  7. user_554634 Member
    user_554634
    @MikeRapkoch

    She:

    Knotwise the Poet:

    And so on and so forth. Remember, if you love people you MUST also agree with and endorse their lifestyle and beliefs. Otherwise, well, skip to 3:10 on this clip for a special message to y’all.

    Without getting into the weeds of a theological, historical and semantic discussion, which I’m not qualified to do on the one hand, and while slightly more qualified on the other, I’m just not up for it, this is why I have always preferred the triumvirate of ‘faith, hope and charity,’ as distinct from ‘faith, hope and love.’

    Because the word ‘love’ just has too much emotional baggage, and discussions of this sort usually end up with one or both sides sounding like the screaming girl in the video clip.

    I can feel charitable towards many people that I do not ‘love,’ and I believe it’s possible (and even required) to think, and act, in Christian charity towards them (if I’m a Christian) even if I do not like what they say or what they do, whether it directly affects me or not. But I do not ‘love’ these people. It’s not personal.

    Why is it no longer acceptable to make that sort of distinction, or to have a viewpoint like that?

    pleeeaaaasssaaa no screaming girl video clips! (-:

    • #97
  8. Knotwise the Poet Member
    Knotwise the Poet
    @KnotwisethePoet

    She:

    Knotwise the Poet:

    And so on and so forth. Remember, if you love people you MUST also agree with and endorse their lifestyle and beliefs. Otherwise, well, skip to 3:10 on this clip for a special message to y’all.

    Without getting into the weeds of a theological, historical and semantic discussion, which I’m not qualified to do on the one hand, and while slightly more qualified on the other, I’m just not up for it, this is why I have always preferred the triumvirate of ‘faith, hope and charity,’ as distinct from ‘faith, hope and love.’…

    Why is it no longer acceptable to make that sort of distinction, or to have a viewpoint like that?

    I’m alright with saying that I love people even when I don’t like what they say and do necessarily.  I’m sure there’s plenty of parents/children/siblings who love their kin even when they drive each other up the wall.  That stated, I’m with you in liking that the King James Bible makes a distinction between “charity” and “love.”

    But I’m sick of this assumption that the belief that sex-distinction is essential to marriage=hating gay people.

    • #98
  9. Ball Diamond Ball Member
    Ball Diamond Ball
    @BallDiamondBall

    Red Feline
    Ball Diamond Ball:Hey, thanks for calling me hateful, too.Check your progressive tolerance.

    I’m not calling you hateful. In fact, I am sure you are a very nice person.

    What I am calling hateful is the attitudes towards gays that too many people express. Doesn’t it seem amazing that some people can’t see how hateful those attitudes are, and how unkind the person who expresses them appears?

    You must think we’re all very stupid.

    • #99
  10. James Of England Inactive
    James Of England
    @JamesOfEngland

    Ball Diamond Ball:Red Feline Ball Diamond Ball:Hey, thanks for calling me hateful, too.Check your progressive tolerance.

    I’m not calling you hateful. In fact, I am sure you are a very nice person.

    What I am calling hateful is the attitudes towards gays that too many people express. Doesn’t it seem amazing that some people can’t see how hateful those attitudes are, and how unkind the person who expresses them appears? — You must think we’re all very stupid.

    I don’t think that Red thinks that we’re stupid. I think that Red really does find the attitude upsetting, but she knew that Mrs. of England and I were SoCons when we met up with her and Indaba in 2013, and she was exceptionally warm and friendly to us, really helping to make the trip a great one.

    There are some on our side who have strong negative feelings about sodomy, but not about gays. I don’t see why Red’s position is any more unreasonable than that.

    • #100
  11. Ball Diamond Ball Member
    Ball Diamond Ball
    @BallDiamondBall

    While I’m sure she is just as nice a person as I am, I see her repeated pronouncements as much a Wax Moth problem as she sees my stubborn refusal to upend my views as bigotry.

    • #101
  12. user_170953 Inactive
    user_170953
    @WilliamLaing

    Ball Diamond Ball:“Many of my friends are very happy about Friday’s US Supreme Court decision.” None of mine are.Not one.

    Soustelle: Mon President, I am getting a lot of criticism from my friends about our Algerian policy.
    De Gaulle: Change your friends.

    • #102
  13. Ricochet Member
    Ricochet
    @GilReich

    LilyBart:Gil, it seems to me that the gay community is starting to embody the very characteristics it claims Christians demonstrate: Self-righteousness, intolerance, hatefulness, hypocrisy, and a desire to force your beliefs on others. (interesting, no?)

    Now, you strike me as an honorable person. Do you think the gay community will realize this and step back, and try to live in harmony and tolerance in victory, or will they … charge on to destroy all churches who won’t change their views and practices in a manner satisfactory to gay activists?

    Thanks Lily. I think all communities have a loud and sometimes bigoted fascist and trollish minority. Many members of the #LoveWins pro-tolerance and diversity community are not very loving, tolerant or pro-diversity. BTW IMO many Christians are not very christian. But at least we’re not physically bashing each other’s heads in, so we’ve made some progress as a society. (We Jews don’t have this nomenclature problem because the negative connotations already built in to “Jew.” Saying “many Jews are not very Jewish” would be saying that they’re very calm and non-argumentative. But I digress.

    Do you think the gay community  …” I think our problem isn’t the gay community, it’s the neo-Marxist fascists who have found the SSM issue a useful cudgel. “Will they charge on to destroy  …” Some will. I hope the good people on both sides can stop them.

    • #103
  14. user_966256 Member
    user_966256
    @BobThompson

    Gil Reich: “Do you think the gay community  …” I think our problem isn’t the gay community, it’s the neo-Marxist fascists who have found the SSM issue a useful cudgel. “Will they charge on to destroy  …” Some will. I hope the good people on both sides can stop them.

    I think this is what’s taking place since all gays I know as friends and acquaintances seem to be reasonable.  Anyone know if the facts with regard to this have been examined, maybe by studying a large cross-section of major urban areas?

    • #104
  15. DrewInWisconsin Member
    DrewInWisconsin
    @DrewInWisconsin

    Mike Rapkoch:

    DrewInWisconsin:

    Mike Rapkoch:Do we really think terms like “useful idiots’ get us anywhere?

    As long as we’re using them historically correctly.

    Sure. And as long as we do not personalize, as Herbert notes.

    I don’t care about that. I just don’t want to lose a useful term. I have been around some thin-skinned people who got all hysterical when I used the term once. I had to explain its historical usage. Still didn’t help.

    • #105
  16. Herbert Woodbery Member
    Herbert Woodbery
    @Herbert

    (( I had to explain its historical usage. Still didn’t help.))

    So if we are discussing something and I say you are being a useful idiot. Ok?

    • #106
  17. DrewInWisconsin Member
    DrewInWisconsin
    @DrewInWisconsin

    The point is, it’s a useful term, and I’m not going to give it up just because some don’t understand how it’s being used.

    Why are you being antagonistic?

    • #107
  18. Ball Diamond Ball Member
    Ball Diamond Ball
    @BallDiamondBall

    Well Drew, Gary is a decent fellow, and Herb here is on the other side anyway.

    • #108
  19. Umbra Fractus Inactive
    Umbra Fractus
    @UmbraFractus

    Red Feline:I hear what you are saying, Gil!

    I’m a Canadian Conservative and I cringe for the Republicans, because this affects their image. As you say, so many of them appear to be

    It appears that these people, unfortunately Republicans, prefer to follow the baser side of their nature, as you say. Don’t they feel any empathy for people who want to have their love recognized by their families, friends, and society? People who are in mixed-race marriages have already gone through this. They too, came up against the same bigoted opposition. But society sided with them in the end.

    We in Canada have had legal SSM for ten years. The sky hasn’t fallen in.

    We are also having the discussions around whether the Supreme Court, human rights, and the Law, trumps the politicians and Parliament.

    You do realize he was addressing both sides, right?

    • #109
  20. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    James Of England:

    Red Feline:  …

    I don’t know if you mean “go along with” morally or legally. …

    If you meant it as a moral matter, do you believe that because four experts took position A and five experts took position B, non-experts should conclude that position B is the only acceptable position?

    Were you in Alberta before Lawrence v. Texas came down? Did you consider then that sodomy laws were legitimate, since a majority of the Court believed this, or do you not find the SCOTUS to be morally binding in that instance?

    I am not a lawyer, James, and am looking at the issue of SSM from an ordinary human, and emotional, point of view. I have had many gay friends and employees, and I can see it from their side. To me, the issue is not a moral one, and I wouldn’t want to say to my gay friends that they couldn’t marry.

    I’m interested in the legal side. It is so important because of the difference it will make to my friends to be considered “normal” and part of the society.

    In view of the international human rights, and how these reflect the thinking of so many people, it really would have been surprising if the US Supreme Court had voted against SSM. They would have been violating human rights in the eyes of so many people, especially of the international community.

    • #110
  21. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    James Of England:   …Were you in Alberta before Lawrence v. Texas came down? Did you consider then that sodomy laws were legitimate, since a majority of the Court believed this, or do you not find the SCOTUS to be morally binding in that instance?

    I had to look up Wikipedia to learn about this case. I find it hard to believe that it was only in 2003 that the United States changed the laws regarding sodomy. Surely that is not the case.

    Once again, to me this is not a moral issue. I have always found it distasteful, to say the least, that any government should have the right to intrude into an individual’s personal life to dictate behaviour between two consenting adults as criminal. Britain changed that law in 1967. I remember that personally because a close friend of mine who happened to be gay, could then return from Africa to his home, England.

    I really don’t care how many judges were for or against, I really only care about the outcome. For my gay friends, this is so important, as they are free from what I too consider unacceptable laws. I rejoice with them.

    • #111
  22. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    Ball Diamond Ball:

    James of England I suspect that he would treat them as the law dictated.

    Zackly, Thank you for the precision.

    I gather that you are a lawyer, BDB. I would expect you to follow the dictates of the law in the exercise of your profession. I have no doubt that you are a person with integrity. In fact, if we met I probably would like you. :)

    • #112
  23. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    Casey:Red, I can draw a link between golf balls and banana splits if I want but that doesn’t make golf balls delicious.Drawing a line between mixed race marriages and same sex unions isn’t any more sensible.

    Don’t you think that the black man I was quoting was saying that it is exceedingly hurtful to be looked on disparagingly by society. He had found that, in his mixed-race marriage. He could empathise with gays in what they must be feeling. In that sense, he was comparing mixed-race marriages to those of gays.

    I could understand what he was saying, and sympathise with him.

    • #113
  24. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    DrewInWisconsin:

    Red Feline:

    DrewInWisconsin:

    Indaba: I think most men on Ricochet think pornography is fine for them to view and they have not turnd into rapists or sex maniacs.

    Wait, what? Did someone do a poll? I agree that porn has been mainstreamed (even as long ago as the TV show “Friends” on which porn was a regular topic) . . . but what would make you think that “most men on Ricochet think pornography is fine”?

    I wouldn’t go there, Drew! Indaba thinks ALL men like pornography. I wouldn’t probe for her opinion of men on that subject. Just a wee warning! :)

    Well, it’s kind of a slanderous thing to say about Ricochet men.

    I ought not to have mentioned Indaba and her opinions. That is her business, not mine. I shouldn’t have tried to be funny.

    • #114
  25. Ricochet Member
    Ricochet
    @GilReich

    Red Feline:

    Ball Diamond Ball:

    I gather that you are a lawyer, BDB. … I have no doubt that you are a person with integrity.

    Talk about your non-sequitur. :)

    • #115
  26. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    Ball Diamond Ball:Red Feline Ball Diamond Ball:Hey, thanks for calling me hateful, too.Check your progressive tolerance.

    I’m not calling you hateful. In fact, I am sure you are a very nice person.

    What I am calling hateful is the attitudes towards gays that too many people express. Doesn’t it seem amazing that some people can’t see how hateful those attitudes are, and how unkind the person who expresses them appears?

    — You must think we’re all very stupid.

    We would have to define the word “stupid”, BDB! :)

    • #116
  27. user_8847 Inactive
    user_8847
    @FordPenney

    Dear Red Feline:

    Lets have this discussion again in 10 years when the ‘tolerant’ left and SSM supporters have made their full assault on religions across the country.When the true nature of being ‘made to care’ will be enforced.

    Then your message of tolerance will ring with its real truth. Our profound ignorance will be writ large and we will be told to bow before the all knowing state because belief is just a construct that must be taken down in the ever evolving nature of ‘tolerance’.

    And YES, we all know the kind and noble religious gay couple, please lay that canard to rest. We are discussing individual rights which don’t seem to apply to anyone EXCEPT the supporters of SSM.

    • #117
  28. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    James Of England:

    Ball Diamond Ball:    — You must think we’re all very stupid.

    I don’t think that Red thinks that we’re stupid. I think that Red really does find the attitude upsetting, but she knew that Mrs. of England and I were SoCons when we met up with her and Indaba in 2013, and she was exceptionally warm and friendly to us, really helping to make the trip a great one.

    There are some on our side who have strong negative feelings about sodomy, but not about gays. I don’t see why Red’s position is any more unreasonable than that.

    Thanks, James, it was such a pleasure meeting you and Mrs. of England!

    I keep saying that it is the attitude towards gays and SSM that I find upsetting, not the person who holds the attitude. I separate the idea from the person. There are all sorts of reasons why people think as they do, and they are entitled to their own belief system. They are not stupid, BDB, because they no doubt have a reason for why they believe what they do.

    I believe differently on this issue because I don’t see it as a moral issue. I see it as a human issue, and I don’t like seeing people suffering from the attitudes of others. I believe that is cruel. I don’t want to be associated with such attitudes, simply because I am a conservative.

    • #118
  29. Casey Inactive
    Casey
    @Casey

    Red Feline:

    Casey:

    Don’t you think that the black man I was quoting was saying that it is exceedingly hurtful to be looked on disparagingly by society. He had found that, in his mixed-race marriage. He could empathise with gays in what they must be feeling. In that sense, he was comparing mixed-race marriages to those of gays.

    Yes, that is exactly what I understood him to say.  And that is exactly what I’m saying is wrong.

    My stomach hurts when I overeat.  Starving children in Africa have pains in their stomachs too.  In his mind we must have a lot in common.

    • #119
  30. Red Feline Inactive
    Red Feline
    @RedFeline

    Ball Diamond Ball:While I’m sure she is just as nice a person as I am, I see her repeated pronouncements as much a Wax Moth problem as she sees my stubborn refusal to upend my views as bigotry.

    For some reason, you make me laugh, BDB. I think we could have a fun time together. Probably that is because you speak your truth, and I can speak mine. I always find that amusing. So few people can do that. :)

    I’ve just looked up Wax Moth as I hate to admit I had never heard of them. Terrible problem for bee hives owners. Also, no doubt, for the bees themselves. I get your point!

    I would have to know on what you are basing your opinions regarding SSM before I would think of calling you a bigot. I didn’t call you a bigot. Actually, I wouldn’t call anyone a bigot on Ricochet as wouldn’t that go against the CofC? In fact, now that I think of it, I would only talk about attitudes as being bigoted, not the person. So, no, BDB, I wouldn’t call you a bigot or bigoted.

    • #120
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