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Your Most Embarrassing Parenting Moment?
The Moser family had a rare opportunity to visit the White House and meet President Obama. In what must be every politically connected parent’s worst nightmare, their toddler chose that once-in-a-lifetime moment to fall on the floor and throw a tantrum.
The image began attracting attention when the girl’s uncle, a columnist for the New York Times, posted it to his Twitter account.
As the parent of two girls, I have suffered my share of public meltdowns and the dirty looks from strangers. The businessman loudly grumbling “oh, great” when I walked down an airplane aisle only to park my crying infant behind him. The mean girls at the college coffeehouse rolling their eyes as my toddler rolled on the floor between tables. The haughty Vacation Bible School parents scandalized that instead of singing “This Little Light of Mine,” my kid glared at the audience as she yawned and picked her nose.
Most parents of older kids are quick to give sympathetic looks to the family dealing with such embarrassments. We’ve all been there. I’m just thankful no White House photographers were present to capture my kids’ less than precious moments.
What mortified me more than kiddie tantrums were when my child innocently said something completely inappropriate. One December day, I had to bring my precocious four-year-old daughter to get her blood drawn. We walked into the overcrowded waiting room to find only one seat available, so she sat on my lap.
Being filled with the Christmas spirit, she marveled at the artificial tree and the cheap lights hanging hither and yon. Then she looked at the kindly man next to me, a Sikh sporting a magnificent beard and a traditional white turban. Her mouth dropped open and a huge smile appeared. In a voice so loud it hurt my ears she yelled, “Look, Daddy! A WISE MAN!”
As the Sikh gentleman and I stared at each other for a second of stunned silence, a nurse called our name and I grabbed my daughter’s hand. As we rushed to the lab room, my daughter yelled, “HE’S COOL!” To this day, I hope that guy realizes that was the greatest compliment she could have given him.
I want to know when your child utterly mortified you. Deliver your most embarrassing anecdotes, Ricochetti.
Published in Culture
Many years ago, my in laws came for their yearly visit (they lived on the East Coast, we lived in California). My then 3 year old daughter decided she didn’t like her grandfather and refused to kiss, hug, or even talk to him.
He pretended to weep and walked out our front door to the end of the porch, telling her he was so sad he was going home.
She yelled “wait! wait!”..ran to his room…returned with his dopp kit…tossed the dopp kit out the door…. and slammed it shut.
(My mother in law wisely announced that it was cocktail time on the East Coast and suggested martinis all around.)
A couple of election years ago, the kids at my nephew’s school had been asked to write down and decorate a short declaration of “What I Would Do if I Were the President.” The teachers had decorated the hallway with the kids’ responses and my sister, Laura, was reading them as she waited for her son to get out of class, one day:
“If I were President, I would help the poor” . . . . “If I were President, I would stop all war . . . and help the poor people” . . . . “If I were President, I would take care of everybody, espeshully the poor people” . . . .
and then she came to this one, in handwriting she recognized all too well:
“If I were President, I would change the National Anthem to ‘Who Let the Dogs Out’ – and everything would be MINE.”
I love that kid.
When he was a six yr-old, my rambunctious nephew perversely insisted upon staying with his childless aunt and uncle when he could have been staying with his experienced and far more tolerant grandparents. But noo…
He happily indulged in our pool and the beach, killing the geckos on my lanai and enjoyed a completely open bedtime hour until he was forced to run errands with me one afternoon. He was initially fine with this; he loved riding in a convertible plus we went to Barnes & Noble (he was allowed to buy a video), Whole Foods (he was indulged with a wide selection of candy) but then, alas, we made a quick stop at Saks 5th for Aunt Liz to pick up some alterations.
To make a long story short, he decided to throw up outside my dressing room door to express his boredom and displeasure.
There are/were no words.
@EThomas: My youngest had asthma as a baby. We don’t have air conditioning and one miserably hot day I had no choice but to take all 4 to the mall and let them play in the play area for the afternoon.
#3 son started coughing, which was never a good sign. I was beginning to gather up the other three; a dad sitting near us offered to hold #3 while I retrieved somebody or other who had climbed out of reach.
#3 son proceeded to barf all over himself and the nice dad. I grabbed #3 away and got myself covered.
I insisted that the nice dad join us at The Gap for a round of new t shirts. All the old ones were double bagged and abandoned in a trash can on the way out.
When the nice dad and I parted ways I said: Emily Post has not yet written the appropriate apology for an act of kindness being rewarded with a puke covered T shirt.
I can’t even remember what that guy looked like, but I remember him often along with a long list of strangers who have added to the quality of my life with random acts of kindness.
@Annefy: I still believe you’re concealing your true identity. You are Erma Bombeck’s reincarnation aren’t you?
@EThompson: I hope you meant that as a compliment as that is the way I am taking it! Thank you; you made my day.
(puke and pee are almost always funny. My 4 kids have blessed me with a lot of both)
EB was one of the funniest columnists ever; she rivaled the great Art Buchwald.
I agree. I also love Dave Barry.
When my oldest daughter was 2 I used to dread the weekly grocery shopping trip. My husband spent anywhere from 12 to 17 or more days per month deployed and his schedule was classified, which meant that once he left I had no idea when he was coming home, so putting off shopping until Dad was home to watch her wasn’t an option.
We began every trip optimistically: “Here’s your little kid-sized cart. Stay close to Mommy and obey or you’ll have to ride in the big cart.” I don’t remember ever making it through even the produce section. From the time I plopped her in the cart, she would scream hysterically at the top of her lungs for the remainder of the trip.
I know the people at that store cringed when they saw us coming, and I hated inflicting her on them, but giving in and letting her have her way wasn’t an option I could live with, so this was it.
My second most embarrassing moment was when our pastor’s wife called to tell me that her teenaged son had used her cell phone to text my teenaged son to ask him if he had any weed he could buy. That was just beautiful…
You win hands down!
Too Bad the tyke did not bite POTUS on the ankle.
Similar. At three our youngest was sensitive to clothes against her skin. It was more than a little embarrassing when she tossed her panties over the back of the pew behind us.
You must have read the same comic books I did. :-D
I’m surprised DCS didn’t cart your children off.