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The Extraordinary Life of Barack Obama’s Imaginary Son
In an upcoming People magazine interview, Barack and Michelle Obama sit down and discuss life as the First Oppressed Couple of the United States. Hoping to shed light and relate to recent events in Ferguson, Missouri, and New York City, Barack reached into the upstairs White House bedroom of his mind and called upon his famous imaginary son to make an appearance:
The small irritations or indignities that we experience are nothing compared to what a previous generation experienced,” President Obama said. “It’s one thing for me to be mistaken for a waiter at a gala. It’s another thing for my son to be mistaken for a robber and to be handcuffed, or worse, if he happens to be walking down the street and is dressed the way teenagers dress.
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Once again, Barack Obama’s imaginary son has found himself unfairly in trouble with the law. If you recall, his imaginary son was also shot by an imaginary neighborhood watch guard in the same style as Trayvon Martin. But Obama’s imaginary son is plucky and resilient and has lived a hard life in the hood so he keeps bouncing back.
In his life, Obama’s imaginary son has been shot at, concussed out of football, and racially profiled. Yet he keeps picking himself up and carrying on. Obama’s imaginary son should be an example to us all. No matter what kind of imaginary circumstances we find ourselves in, we can continue on with our imaginary lives.
One day this country can hopefully move on from racism experienced by imaginary people — and, let’s face it, the country doesn’t have the best of history of its treatment of imaginary people. We have, however, made progress in the civil rights of imaginary people and for that we, as a country, should be proud. We shouldn’t ignore, however, the real truth that racism toward imaginary sons is still a real problem, as our President constantly reminds us. We can’t be afraid to have the conversation, no matter how painful it might be, about continuing the racial healing of imaginary people.
President Obama, however, also should look inward and ask why his imaginary son continues to put himself in these situations. Perhaps it is also his own failings as an imaginary parent. Maybe his imaginary son is trying to rebel against the pressures that come with being the first imaginary son of the United States. Perhaps the President can get him some better-fitting clothes and tell him to stay in school instead of having constant run-ins with imaginary police.
Obama himself has been racially profiled so much in his life that, in order to relate to the struggles in Ferguson, he has to cite an imaginary person out of thin air to prove it. Obama’s American story apparently isn’t overcoming an absent father, being raised by loving grandparents, attending Columbia and Harvard Universities, and becoming President of the United States.
His story, as we are constantly reminded, is been being mistaken for a waiter, something his closest adviser also did to a four-star general. “Before [becoming president], Barack Obama was a black man that lived on the South Side of Chicago, who had his share of troubles catching cabs,” the First Lady said in the interview.
In the same conversation, Michelle Obama claimed a woman profiled her by asking for help to reach for something off a shelf during her (widely publicized) trip to Target:
I tell this story – I mean, even as the first lady – during that wonderfully publicized trip I took to Target, not highly disguised, the only person who came up to me in the store was a woman who asked me to help her take something off a shelf. Because she didn’t see me as the first lady, she saw me as someone who could help her. Those kinds of things happen in life. So it isn’t anything new.
Silly racist peasant asking our Queen for assistance.
The President of the United States seems more comfortable citing the struggles of his imaginary son than the privileged successes of his real daughters. In truth, Obama’s son would have attended private schools in Chicago, just like his daughters. He would then be attending Sidwell Private School in DC, just like his real daughters. Obama’s imaginary son would get his pick of any college in the world, just like his real daughters. His imaginary son would then go on to any career he chose, in medicine, law, Hollywood, or Wall Street, just like his real daughters. But that doesn’t fit the divisive racial narrative — so his son lives the hard-knock life.
According to Obama, we still have much work to do in the race relations of imaginary people. Unfortunately, the healing can’t begin until the country moves on from this imaginary President
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In fact, aren’t something like 92% of New York cabbies from somewhere other than the United States? If black men can’t get a cab in New York, that’s not because Americans are racist.
Someone needs to explain that “First Lady” is her title, not her ranking.
Is she griping about someone asking her to get something, or is she simply saying that she wasn’t recognized? It’s not clear to me.
When my kids were little, we’d call that kind of look the “mad face.” You wouldn’t want to ask for help from someone with the mad face.
Whatever the narrative calls for, she’ll provide the anecdote.
The real question is whether Obama’s imaginary son could get a $600,000 a year no-show job for NBC News.
Enjoyed this post very much, thanks
And yet we continue to accuse them of rape and other heinous crimes at an alarming rate.
I found the People comments not quite believable but hey, she was there and she has always been clear she views the country through a racial prism. Maybe the interaction was uncomfortable.
I had not heard about this visit to Letterman, however, so followed the link. They only have the quote there, so I found the interview on Youtube. Comparing her actual comments then (starting at the 4:40 mark) to the People quote today is just dispiriting. And the shame of it is that to true believers the fact that she turned the story around 180 degrees to fit a political narrative will mean nothing at all.
Did he just mug Rahm Emanuel’s real son?
Problem is my dear Miss M, you (like me) are a racist. High time you cop to the truth baby cakes. Life won’t get any easier but at least your conscience will know its guilt.
Grate (for all of you racists that is one of the many spelling options in ebonics) post Dog. Very Like.
Like most black celebrities , I did not realize that President Obama had a son out of wedlock.
A Fake John Galt should be more understanding of a imagined slights. A thousand imaginary paper cuts upon you.
Stephen,
Not only would his imaginary son be attending private schools but he would be escorted everywhere by secret service. His biggest problem would be figuring out how to lose the secret service agents assigned to him.
As far as Mrs. Obama, the incident makes one wonder exactly what planet Mrs. Obama is from. Is she so spoiled that she has never been in a super market or Target like store where there are items on a high shelf and no fawning clerk to cater to your every whim. I’m asked often when I’m at the supermarket. It’s usually a 5’3″ women who has her eye on an item on the top shelf. I never mind and often it makes an impersonal day seem a little more human.
I think the Obama’s should have concentrated on ‘a little more human’. It’s a little late now.
Regards,
Jim
Obama talking about his imaginary son’s run-ins with the law is like me (part Lebanese) talking about my imaginary child being accused of jihadi terrorism. Why are we talking about children that don’t exist and their supposed encounters when the “parents” don’t even experience the same discrimination as the fictitious children?
If the Obamas so enjoy the life imaginary, I’m sure they can find a local improv class where they can make-believe to their progressive heart’s content. I feel a tax payer purchased Holiday present coming! “To: Barry & Michelle, from: Santa Tax Payer- enjoy a Groupon for 10 improvisation classes where you can bullshinkies all you want. Happy Holidays!”
Didn’t his son have a book and TV deal?
“[Expletive] My Dad Says”.
So it’s racist to ask someone to help you in a store? And this is the horrible oppression The First Lady faces? And it’s beneath her royal highness to help someone while slumming with the peons at Target?
Michelle Obama is truly a small person. Perfect for her narcissist husband. Two of a kind.
Ricochet just doesn’t get any better than this. Thank you SM.
I’m listening to the podcast of today’s Rush Limbaugh show and he’s reading this post!
Seriously?
Transcript.
http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/daily/2014/12/22/the_left_nurtures_hate
Gracias por el link.
Out of curiosity, how much do people think the Obamas were trying to rile people up and how much was their real feelings? The Letterman angle suggests this is all a bunch of fakery, but the Obamas strike me as sufficiently thin-skinned to believe it. I have no doubt that Obama believes an equally terrible white President would have a 100% approval rating.
After hearing this post referenced on the Limbaugh show, I thought it would be fun to see how long the servers would be up i refreshed after about 45 seconds and it was all over! Great exposure for Ricochet, once they came back of course! Outstanding post too BTW.
Well done Stephen!
I read the post aloud to my wife and she asked me to stop laughing and just read. Give Obama a fully loaded hayloft and he’ll create a nation of strawmen.
He has his very own Facebook page now. https://www.facebook.com/ObamasImaginarySon
This is blatant discrimination to the vertically enhanced. How dare those short people ask her for help to reach something high? Haven’t the tall had to endure enough. Ceiling fans, airplane leg room, doorway lintels or having to be asked “hey how’s the weather up there?” on a constant basis. Perhaps, Mrs. Obama should start a movement so that we short folks can understand the trials of being tall in a short world.
Leg room on an airplane is something Michelle will never have to worry about again.
That Facebook thing is too funny. You really should check it out.
Dude (AKA: SM) you are now an official Ricochet Rock Star. Rock on dude!