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On Cat-calling and Feminism
Making the rounds on the Internet is a video of a woman minding her own business on the streets of New York and being catcalled. Everyone else has weighed in, so I thought I’d throw my two cents into the ring. Although I’m sure that everyone will ignore this part, I’d like to say that harassing a woman (or, for that matter, men) is not acceptable under any circumstances. It’s just simply not okay. That being said, let’s dive in.
If you haven’t seen the video, it features a woman walking around New York City wearing jeans and a t-shirt. The video was filmed secretly (she was aware of it, those around her were not) for 10 hours, and she was catcalled 108 times. I think we can all agree that that is pretty gross. So, where does the blame fall for such grossness? I’d argue that quite a lot of this is the legacy of second- and third-wave feminism.
There was a time when men were gentlemen. I’m not saying it was perfect, but I think we can all agree that Victorian men weren’t shouting “Looking good, baby!” at the ladies walking by. Men had a level of respect for women that would have made it unacceptable to society. I would posit that men also respected themselves more thanto behave in such a demeaning way. Oh, how the times have changed.
Then feminism came along. They upset the balance in a good way by earning women equal rights. They upset the balance in a bad way by acting like idiots. When the battle cry of women is consequence-free sex, free birth control, and free abortion, it’s not surprising that men see women as objects for sex. When politicians pander to women based on these issues, telling women to “vote like your lady parts depend on it,” it shows that society has taken these messages to heart. When women actually respond positively to these messages and vote for those candidates, it is clearly indicative of how much respect they have for themselves as sentient beings. Congratulations, feminists, the world sees you as a very specific body part, which is exactly where you started. So, why should we be surprised that this translates to a woman walking down the street?
How about the men involved? Yes, they are gross. Men have been so pushed around by feminists that they have made it practically impossible to be a gentleman without giving offense. Maybe, and this is a radical notion, when a man pays a woman a compliment, she could just say “thank you.” Half of the instances in this video are men saying things like “have a nice day,” which hardly seems inflammatory.
Instead, so many women get their victim on in response to every little thing a man does and this serves to push men into three camps. The first is the men who choose to say nothing. They have been gelded by the feminist movement and are over there, hiding, being all beta male. Then we have the men like those in the video, who have figured that since they are going to be berated anyway, they might as well just remove the filter (plus, the whole lack of respect mentioned above). Finally, there is the increasingly tiny camp of men who will continue to act with chivalry even if the occasional woman bristles at having the door held open for her. While women are largely responsible for allowing themselves to be portrayed in a certain way, men need to stand up and do what is right regardless of ruffled feathers.
Sure, “street harassment” shouldn’t be something with which women have to contend on a daily basis. I think, on that, we may all agree. If you want to put a stop to it though, you will have to accept what’s actually behind it. Women should be able to go for a walk without being harassed, and that comes down to respect, but that respect is not something to which we are inherently entitled. We first must respect ourselves as men and women and show ourselves to be respectable.
Published in General
No, I think you were clear in the OP. I would take issue, however, with the idea that feminism is a contributing cause. Consider a thought experiment: If feminist influence ended tomorrow, would the problem improve? I think not — catcalling was a problem beforehand, probably a worse one than it is today. So it’s hard to pin much of the blame on cultural confusion fostered by feminism.
And invoking “feminism” does as much damage as invoking “patriarchy” in this instance. Pointing to an -ism absolves individuals (at least partially) of responsibility for their behavior. Men, including the ones in the video, are in no way confused about what modern society considers acceptable and respectful behavior. They just don’t care enough to self-censor.
Percival, this is awesome, and I’ll be using it from now on. I hope you don’t mind.
This calls to mind the classic Tom Brady SNL skit: http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=f76_1323277426
A little afield of the point you are making, but I’ve experienced far seedier comments when walking in the city, in particular in the Castro district. Even times when I’m walking while holding The Angelic One’s hand. It isn’t welcome or pleasant, but I also know where it is most likely to occur and can easily avoid those areas.
Lucie Pevensie: “It does seem to me that it’s a local cultural phenomenon. I have experienced much less of this in any other city I have visited or lived in. . . ”
Have you visited or lived in Italy, Spain or Greece? Little presented in that video compares with what happens to a woman walking urban streets alone or with another female in those places. And not necessarily in the seedy sections of town either. You are likely to be followed not only by one man but often by men in twos or threes. It’s mainly amusing. If they make comments they are admiring, not threatening and not obscene. In Italy it is a sport and a pastime, going back at least 50 years when I first saw it there.
I’m not defending the behavior, but It’s silly to act like this is something new, something unique to the USA or something that’s yet another issue for women to claim victimization. I hope we’re made of stronger stuff. (Apologies if I’m repeating the remarks of others; I haven’t yet gone through all of the comments)
@curiouskevmo – you beat me to with the Tom Brady Video.
1. Be Attractive
2. Don’t be unattractive.
…
LOL
I noticed that NBC made them remove it from YouTube which is a mistake in my view.
I agree, I used to have a copy of it.
From the Onion
I’ve spent time in Italy and France. This behavior doesn’t feel so much like what I experienced in Italy, as like what I experienced at the hands of North Africans in France. In other words, it’s much more threatening than the standard Italian kind of “cat-calling.”
Two thoughts come to mind. First, I can’t help but remember walking through Times Square in the ’80s and being propositioned by hookers with a similar frequency. Here I would say this is an improvement.
Secondly, I can’t help but think about how we have infantilized men these days So why should we be surprised when they act like overgrown children with poor impulse control. I was raised to respect women by both my parents. I spoke disrespectfully to my mother once. I wore my father’s hand print on my face for a week. Lesson learned. I am told I am a man’s man, but at the same time I know no other way than to treat women like a lady. And the usual comment I get from women is that it is nice to meet a man who is not afraid to be a real a man. If you tell young males it is OK to act like an adolescent well into your 20’s, they have no idea what it is to be man and how to behave like one.
Finally watched the video. Is it bad that I don’t think it’s such a big deal? This type of thing is this pretty common in certain communities. The guys following her were pretty creepy, but if she’d told them to buzz off or had given them the finger, they’d of likely left her alone. Most of these encounters were in broad daylight with people around. She wasn’t in danger. Some of them seemed like they were just trying to get a reaction out of her and get her to smile, because she looked so uptight. They were uncouth, but not uncomplimentary. She has a big butt and wearing tight jeans walking around a black/Hispanic neighborhood, and somehow we’re shocked! shocked! that she’s getting some catcalls? Gimme a break. If you want to blame something/someone, blame hip-hop/pop music. Many songs have instructions on how to mistreat women, and singers like Miley Cyrus, Rihanna, Jay-Z and Beyoncé, etc., are celebrated for it. Better yet, blame the economy. Why aren’t those guys working instead of roaming the streets?
One-hundred eight catcalls in 10 hours? That’s roughly 10 per hour, or one every 6 minutes. My thought is that New York must be getting more civilized . . .
Come on, we’re talking NEW YORK here!
I’m coming into this late, but I wanted to say that I find myself in agreement with the original poster. I won’t defend the boys (term used purposely) cat-calling in the video. I would also like to suggest that the infantilization of men has contributed. Unemployment is a factor. But to me, the biggest thing is the simple fact that so few boys are being raised in a family unit people would label as ‘traditional’. No fathers to teach their sons to respect women, and mothers who by virtue of necessity or choice, are not the role model boys need to establish a civil perspective on the fairer sex.
There is an interesting take on the video from Glen Reynolds in USA Today.
There were a couple of interesting things he pointed out that I hadn’t seen mentioned here. All of the cat callers were minorities – In 10 hours of walking they couldn’t find enough footage to equally indict white guys? As he put it, “…they released a video about “street harassment” that was also, quite plainly, a video of minority men harassing a white woman.”
Which he though raised two points, the first of which I’ll post here, “Different cultures and ethnicities have different ideas of what constitutes appropriate intersexual behavioral, and there’s no particular reason why the standards of upper-middle-class white feminist women should set the norm for everyone.”
For the second, he points out that the video raises the ghost of Jim Crow and in particular, the murder of Emmet Till.
Read the whole thing.
http://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2014/11/03/street-harassment-catcall-video-race-women-gender-equity-column/18373531/