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Kids these days…
As I discussed in a recent post, sometimes our adult children do things we’re not proud of. It’s even more painful when you catch them in the act yourself. So you can imagine my distress when I saw my beautiful little girl in a compromising position (see picture). Ok, she’s 21 years old, and is normally a virtuous person of sound judgement. And we all have the occasional lapse. But you can imagine how upsetting it was for me to see her lifting the top layer of chocolates, which was still half full, so she could steal a chocolate from the bottom layer.
Me: “What are you doing?!?”
Her: “What?”
Me: “You can’t take chocolates from the bottom layer! Not until we finish the top layer!”
Her: “Why not?”
Me: “It’s just wrong.”
Her: “It’s wrong to take chocolates from a box of chocolates?”
Me: “There are right ways to do that, and there are wrong ways to do that.”
She rolled her eyes, and continued her distressing behavior. Right in front of me. I’ve been upset ever since.
If anyone would like to chime in below, and help me explain to her why this is so wrong, I’d appreciate it. She won’t listen to me. She says I’m being ridiculous. If you can imagine.
It’s not easy being a father, sometimes.
I’d console myself with a piece of chocolate, but the only ones left on the top layer are yucky.
Published in General
She’s not just smart but has good taste. Console yourself with that! And also, if this is the only issue you have with her, you are a very lucky father. Now, back to bourbon…
I’m very sympathetic. I’m the one who tries a piece and hands it off to my husband if it disappoints. Mostly if it turns out to be coffee or otherwise weird or disguised as dark but really milk.
Take the yucky piece, soak it in bourbon for an hour, then try it.
It depends on if what you’re taking from the bottom is chocolate filled with that red raspberry jelly.
You like that stuff?
The right way to do it is buy a box of all good stuff. Get the things you like, especially from a Ricochet member.
The chocolates on the top probably have cocoanut in them. You’d expect your daughter to eat chocolate that has been polluted by cocoanut? What kind of father does that?
I am sure Dr. B has done that.
And probably ate the chocolate, too.
(thx for the setup. I owe you one, A.)
Split decision here, Doc.
I was appalled. Strands of the fabric of civilization and the like.
The Missus condones the practice, leading to a discussion of the sorry absence of enough coconut chocolates (even in upscale assortments), leading naturally to Cartman hogging all the KFC chicken skins, which tempered her position to the point where I had to admit that I’m not fond of coconut chocolates. But she just keeps bringing me Corzo tequila.
So, tops, it’s a vote for your societal order and a vote for the coconut chocolates.
I wouldn’t expect my daughter to eat those. She better leave those for me, or else.
We used to go there!! Dipped CA apricots! Caramels! Toffee!
We would get a stash to bring home. Always lunch or dinner at Casanova -tapenade, gnocchi, sole and olallieberry pie. Always pie. One of the few things I miss about CA – a nice weekend in Carmel. And the optician who ground his lenses in the shop and always made my difficult prescription perfectly. (He did it long distance for a few years after we moved. Then he sold the shop…)
Maybe pick better battles, big fellah. When you go to deliver paternal wisdom on the big issues it will be from a guy who thinks which chocolates you take from the box is an ethical issue worthy of discussion which is a distinct downgrade of gravitas.
Another wonderful KETO dieting tip!! (Bourbon destroys the carb content of chocolate candy, as I understand it.)
I seem to recall when I was a kid, my dad would nibble a corner off a chocolate to see if it was good and put it back if he didn’t like it.
Randy
I seem to recall when I was a kid, my dad would nibble a corner off a chocolate to see if it was good and put it back if he didn’t like it.
Crime against humanity. Must have been years of therapy.
Thank you for that link. I just lifted it for our community newsletter; is that OK?
First world problem, guy.
Sure.
If I were Her I would have then taken the liner of the top layer and toss all the remaining top layer chocolates in the trash.
” There. Bottom layer is open for business.”
Doc, you’re just angry because you didn’t think to do it first. I sort of agree with you on the layer thing, but if the only chocolates left in the layer are ones you don’t like, it’s time to dive to that second layer.
Make an announcement or send a press release if you want the family to know you do it only under the duress of competition for the good chocolates in the box. “I did not want to compete this way, but, by golly, I’ll have my chocolate.”
Finishing the top layer before starting the bottom layer is an essential life lesson – that life is like a box of chocolates.
The young chocolate consumer must learn the he (or she, as in this case) must take the bad with the good. One cannot simply ignore the bad or inconvenient aspects of our lives, but must embrace them in order to become a better person.
A job should be seen through to the end (in this case eating ALL the chocolates on the top layer as required by the applicable CFR and enforced by the EPA) and not done in a half-a$$ed manner. Her coach would certainly not accept her putting forth less than 100% into team practice. So too should she put 100% into her chocolate-eating.
Finishing the top layer before moving on to the bottom layer also gave her a chance to be selfless and sacrifice her chocolatey enjoyment by consuming the less tasty ones left on top (as they most certainly are) and enabling her loving family to enjoy the finer pieces on the bottom without having to endure the trauma of eating the nasty ones up top.
Last, she missed a golden opportunity to improve her self-discipline. No one can achieve great things without discipline; and the highest form of discipline is self-discipline. Taking short-cuts in the interest of achieving instant gratification will not help her develop character.
I hope this helps.
Not necessarily. In my family many people have died for fingering the wrong chocolate.
PS: I was not one of them.
Kamalaesque.
Kamala is incapable of making that much sense.
Brilliant.
I suspect Aristotle would take a similar view.
Oooo, now that hurt. It might be a word-salad, but at least it contained some semi-literate points (gotta take the good with the bad, finish the job you start, take one for the team, and self-discipline is important). Plus, I didn’t get this job by sleeping my way to the bottom; I worked hard to be this stupid.
I can put some blame on whoever does the initial purchasing, too. There are different varieties of chocolates available, and it’s usually possible to select even variety packages to minimize the presence of items known to be not favored by the particular audience. It may cost more, but you get more of what you like and less of what you don’t.
Okay, okay, you guys. I take it back. I was going to write “Nearly Kamalaesque,” but I thought it would be too wordy. And I was going to say, “On a good day!” but I thought that she never would have such a good day.
So I’ll just say, “In her dreams.”
Well, I doubt that even her dreams are that coherent. How could such a mediocre mind even imagine such things?
Fairy dust is an hallucinogen.