Ricochet is the best place on the internet to discuss the issues of the day, either through commenting on posts or writing your own for our active and dynamic community in a fully moderated environment. In addition, the Ricochet Audio Network offers over 50 original podcasts with new episodes released every day.
Ask Amelia: Gays, Gruyere and the Common Cold
It’s Friday afternoon, which means it’s time again for Amelia Hamilton to answer all your queries about gouda, same-sex weddings, and germy kids!
Dear Amelia, Some Republican candidates have been taken to task for opposing the legalization of same-sex marriage even though they still would attend same-sex weddings or events surrounding them when it comes to close friends or family members. I, too, oppose gay marriage, but have a friend who has invited me to his ceremony (which is not in a church, but officiated by a member of the clergy). I feel like I could attend the reception as a support of our friendship without supporting something destructive of the institution, but a lot of people disagree with me. How should I handle this? Should attend? Should I abstain? And what should I say to my friend either way?
Signed,
Respectful Dissenter
Dear Dissenter,
This is a tricky situation indeed. Presumably, your issue is with the religious implications of the word “marriage,” rather than with their partnership. If that is, indeed, the case, skip the wedding, go to the reception and celebrate this milestone in their relationship. There’s every chance that the brides or grooms will be too wrapped up in the wedding to remember who was at the ceremony, and they’ll see you when they have more time to socialize and celebrate their happiness at the reception.
Dear Amelia,
Am I a jerk for bringing a kid with a bad cold to a large playgroup? Hint: I already did. Kids get colds. If you want your kid in a bubble don’t bring them out.
Curious Mom
Dear Curious,
I’m not a mom, but it seems to me that part of the idea of a playgroup is to socialize kids (and their parents, too). Socialization will pretty much always mean exposure to germs, and it’s only going to get worse as they get to school. It’s hardly unusual for a toddler to have a runny nose. I would say it depends on the group. Are you close friends with the other parents? Do they bring their kids with colds, too? The only thing that gives me pause is that you used the adjective “bad.” If you would have kept said kid home from school, or if you would have been annoyed with another mom for bringing her equally germy child, probably best to keep him/her home from playgroup.
Dear Amelia,
Which is the superior cheese: gouda, swiss, or gruyere?
Neal Dewing
Dear Neal,
This is the correct ranking: gruyere, gouda, swiss. Enjoy!
Agree? Disagree? Have something to add? Leave a comment! Tweet your questions using #AskAmHam or email them to askamelia@mail.com.
Published in General
Amelia may be new around here but she learns fast.
Want to start a 200 comment thread? Mention cheese.
‘Cheese at a gay wedding’ would get 300 comments.
Gruyere cheese at a gay wedding could make it climb to 400 comments . . .
I’m from the upper Midwest. I don’t need any incentive to talk about cheese.
As a parent, I suggest that you shouldn’t bring a kid with a bad cold to a large playgroup.
I must disagree with your answer to Neal. The correct cheese depends on the use.
For example, I recently posted that great French onion soup must be made using gruyere.
And what about sandwiches? Ham and Swiss on rye is a classic, as well as turkey and Swiss.
Gouda . . . this cheese is just plain good cutting into chunks, and downing with beer while watching a football game.
Oh – my wife and I love the cheddar we get shipped from Wisconsin. We might have to move there just for the cheese (and beer) alone . . .
Now, I have to get back to the kitchen to cook my pepper-jack hamburgers (cast iron skillets rock!).
I look forward to additional posts regarding cheese!
I agree except in one context. Swiss is the cheese of choice for a pastrami (or corned beef) on rye. Which has to be grilled and which, by the way, is even better with guacamole.
I forgot . . . reubens! I use Swiss and (not a purist) pastrami to make my reubens.
Well, OK, so John kinda took the wind out of my sails there, because I had no idea what Gruyere was. The extent of my cheese snobbery is that I pronounce Gouda “how-da” on account of I lived there when I was a child and I’m not relearning how to pronounce it.
But you are all ignoring the most important thing that will get this to 1000 comments: the reignition of the Mommy Wars, with cheese snobbery implicating your appropriate hipster irony levels as the perfect mommy. Please, weddings and receptions will be a footnote.
ONLY a gay wedding would have gruyere at it.
When talking cheese be sure to keep it civil. I am watching you.
Next week I hope to combine cheese and subsidiarity. My interest in subsidiarity and local government has gotten me out on my bicycle, taking photos of township halls in the Great Lakes region. Last October, at one tiny town hall tucked in next to a cheese factory in Green County, Wisconsin, I failed to note that the cheese place was called the Edelweiss Town Hall Cheese Factory. I was greedy to notch another town hall before the day was over, and rode on too quickly without getting proper photos of that and of the long-distance view to the north. I hope to go back next week, remedy this deficiency, and then continue where I left off.
Reticulater, are you telling us the ice has melted enough for you to ride your bike?
If I refuse to eat cheese at a gay wedding because I have a cold, can I still be president?
It frosted last night but daffodils are blooming. We planted fruit trees today, and in between tree plantings I rode 20 miles in short sleeves. And the part of Wisconsin I’m heading to is part of the driftless area where the last glaciation didn’t dare go.
A kid with a “bad cold” should be kept home. Yes, colds happen, but severe colds are miserable for the whole family. And small kids (like you find in playgroups) are the world’s most efficient germ-spreaders.
Minor sniffly nose? Tail end of a cough? Pass.
Gruyere mixed with cream cheese, stuffed into a jalapeño , wrapped in bacon and then grilled. Boom! Conversation finished.
Good answer for the homosexual wedding. No need to stay away from the reception unless it will make you uncomfortable.
The child with the bad cold should absolutely be kept away from other children. If you wouldn’t want adults and especially the elderly to be unnecessarily exposed to sick people, there isn’t any reason to expose kids. Then, they bring these germs home to infect their parents, grandparents, and siblings. They will be sick enough times without intentionally being exposed.
When you ask which cheese is better, you are really asking “Which cheese do you prefer?” There is no right answer, except to say that a really good American cheese (e.g., Boar’s Head) is the best cheese. Don’t agree? I challenge your patriotism.
BTW, being a parent is difficult enough without all the second-guessers telling them what they should have done. On the other hand, it’s like Hillary said: It takes a village to raise a child. In this case it’s an internet village.
Colds don’t bother us. But I have a huge beef with parents who think nothing of bringing kids with flu or pink-eye.