The Unspoken Issue Threatening to Tear This Nation Apart

 

On Ricochet we are not afraid to tackle the tough issues, in fact we pay for the privilege, we go at it hammer and tongs debating those crucial questions which will determine the future of our nation.

Whether it be the proper manner in which to cook spaghetti, who creates the best pizza or even the quantity of pointless comments. I hesitated before publishing this, some issues may be too hot even for our sober minded community however problems are not resolved by ignoring them so I am going there.

There is only one proper way to hang toilet paper, the correct manner is over. Under is wrong, if you believe otherwise then you are wrong.

tp_diag01

The choice is clear, over.

This question must be worked into all future debates, I need to know where the candidates stand. This is my deal breaker.

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  1. Richard Rummelhart Inactive
    Richard Rummelhart
    @RichardRummelhart

    Proposed legislation in Minnesota if passed could solve this problem.  In the state where nothing is allowed a provision in a proposed new bill would outlaw toilet paper holders.  The proposed provision is based on controversial federally funded research that show 0.00000001% of arguments that end in violence are over the toilet paper issue.

    Among some of the other provisions of the bill include outlawing garage doors because people are still being injured by garage doors.

    • #61
  2. Sheila S. Inactive
    Sheila S.
    @SheilaS

    Claire Berlinski, Ed.: Living with cats is no excuse to be the kind of feckless slob who hangs the toilet paper the wrong way and buys synthetic bedding.

    Exactly. (I only have two, but have owned cats my entire life. I wouldn’t know how to live in a world in which cleaning up cat vomit wasn’t a thing.)

    As someone who doesn’t like to turn on the light at night for a bathroom trip, the following conditions must be maintained:

    1. Lid up
    2. Seat down
    3. TP over the top to facilitate finding the end if it sticks to the roll

    My husband likes to keep me guessing as to which of these conditions occasionally won’t be met.

    • #62
  3. EJHill Podcaster
    EJHill
    @EJHill

    TP

    • #63
  4. dbeck Inactive
    dbeck
    @dbeck

    I’m reminded of the little packet of TP that came with C-rations. In 1967 we were getting c-rats mfgd in 1955 and had superior TP. By mid 1969 we were getting recently mfgd c-rats with inferior TP. So much for progress.

    • #64
  5. Amy Schley Coolidge
    Amy Schley
    @AmySchley

    Sheila S.:

    Claire Berlinski, Ed.: Living with cats is no excuse to be the kind of feckless slob who hangs the toilet paper the wrong way and buys synthetic bedding.

    Exactly. (I only have two, but have owned cats my entire life. I wouldn’t know how to live in a world in which cleaning up cat vomit wasn’t a thing.)

    As someone who doesn’t like to turn on the light at night for a bathroom trip, the following conditions must be maintained:

    1. Lid up
    2. Seat down
    3. TP over the top to facilitate finding the end if it sticks to the roll

    My husband likes to keep me guessing as to which of these conditions occasionally won’t be met.

    As our cats treat paper hung either way as a toy, the roll stays on its side on the counter.  Our apartment has one of those counters that goes over the tub.  All I ask of him is that the toilet paper stays on the counter to the side instead of back there, as I don’t face that direction while using the facility.

    • #65
  6. Sash Member
    Sash
    @Sash

    Amy Schley:I’ll stick with the ex-PM of Canada:

    I think people should elect a cat person. If you elect a dog person, you elect someone who wants to be loved. If you elect a cat person, you elect someone who wants to serve.

    • Interview with Kevin Newman, Global National April 5th, 2006.

    Now there’s a debate question!  And only with this secret knowledge can we judge the answer.

    • #66
  7. Misthiocracy Member
    Misthiocracy
    @Misthiocracy

    The perforated toilet roll was invented in 1891.

    Here is the illustration that accompanied the patent:

    us459516-0.png

    Source: https://www.google.com/patents/US459516

    • #67
  8. Duane Oyen Member
    Duane Oyen
    @DuaneOyen

    Matthew Gilley:I was worried for a second. I feared another Oxford comma cage fight.

    Did we ever resolve the fact that the Oxford comma indeed needs to be used?  To say otherwise would be to refuse to use brackets in multivariate algebra.

    • #68
  9. Sheila Inactive
    Sheila
    @Sheila

    This is why I love Ricochet.

    • #69
  10. Paul Erickson Inactive
    Paul Erickson
    @PaulErickson

    Roberto:Right vs. Wrong.

    one_handed_toilet_paper_tear

    Do not be fooled by clever diagrams.  There is no one-handed tear in the over configuration.

    • #70
  11. Paul Erickson Inactive
    Paul Erickson
    @PaulErickson

    Clavius: To continue, the metal over the top device is proof that extra hardware is needed to properly tear sheets and is therefore inferior.

    Yes, that.  And invariably the tear happens up under the metal piece so you have to use two hands to lift it and find the end next time.

    First thing I do in hotels that have those annoying TP flaps is pull off the roll and put it where I can actually use it.

    • #71
  12. EJHill Podcaster
    EJHill
    @EJHill

    Misthiocracy: Here is the illustration that accompanied the patent:

    So everytime we hang TP we violate someone’s patent?

    • #72
  13. Judge Mental Member
    Judge Mental
    @JudgeMental

    I never realized toilet paper was so challenging.

    • #73
  14. James Wigderson Inactive
    James Wigderson
    @JamesWigderson

    EJHill:

    Misthiocracy: Here is the illustration that accompanied the patent:

    So everytime we hang TP we violate someone’s patent?

    Just the terms and conditions in the user agreement to which you consented with the act of opening the package.

    • #74
  15. lesserson Member
    lesserson
    @LesserSonofBarsham

    Judge Mental:I never realized toilet paper was so challenging.

    I know, I suggest title of the post be changed to, “Toilet Paper: You’re doing it wrong…”

    • #75
  16. Pilli Inactive
    Pilli
    @Pilli

    I just read all the comments thus far.  I don’t know about about but I’m wiped.

    • #76
  17. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    The King Prawn:Alternatively, this is how children (especially of the lazy variety) place it on the holder…

    tp2

    I do this sometimes because the holder is poorly located and reaching it is awkward. I don’t want to end up in the emergency room having dislocated my shoulder and declaring it a toilet paper accident.

    • #77
  18. Dustoff Inactive
    Dustoff
    @Dustoff

    King Prawn re: #6 ,

    If that is a “Brown Recluse”, then I’m convinced. Over the top, no question.

    • #78
  19. James Lileks Contributor
    James Lileks
    @jameslileks

    There is the spouse’s preference, and there is the wrong way.

    • #79
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