Where No Non-specific-gender Person Has Gone Before

 

Star TrekCBS is bringing back “Star Trek,” but it’ll cost you. Forty quatloos or whatever the price for their streaming service turns out to be. Comments at Variety are just what you’d expect: the producer is the wrong guy, they should do that other show, won’t pay, et cetera. “Star Trek” fans — at least the vocal ones — will repay the resurrection of their beloved franchise by nit-picking the next iteration to bloody bits.

Predictions: A few PC boxes will be checked to ensure peace and quiet from the critics and the perpetually aggravated. The ship will be bright and shiny inside, with lots of blue, the Official Color of the Future. Everyone will be adept at typing on glass screens during moments of crisis. There will be a Vulcan, because you have to have at least one laconic, sarcastic stuck-up character, and there will be an Engineer and a Doctor. There will be six writers who give up trying to find new ways to inhabit these archetypes. It will be set in the new Trek timeline, which gives the writers the freedom to ignore many of the things that dictated the breadth of the plot lines.

Savaged by fans keen to show they are pure, it will slowly get better, but the true fans will not accept this, and regard it as an abomination that happens when you don’t listen to people who really nailed the whole problem with Trek in the 547th nested comment on a subreddit dedicated to the third season of “Voyager.”

Me, I’m glad. It’s preferable to nothing, and I’ve found that I can actually enjoy things that aren’t perfect, as long they’re not trying too hard to push me away. (See also, “Tomorrowland.” Or rather don’t.) The big question is whether the sixth series can provide anything new. It’s going to be about a Federation vessel that explores space and runs into bipeds with similar technology but ridges on their cheeks or noses.

What’s left to tell? What’s left to show?

Published in Entertainment
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  1. Brandon Phelps Member
    Brandon Phelps
    @

    I enjoyed the original series, the cartoon series, and Enterprise. I’ll probably enjoy this series because I loved both Abramtreks because I love lense flare, plot points be <CoC>ed. I would enjoy all versions of Star Trek if they didn’t ‘explore’ things from a leftist perspective. But then, that is the spirit of the series from the beginning.

    This is one reason that Firefly is similar to but so much better than Star Trek: it’s libertarian and conservative.

    • #61
  2. Fake John Galt Coolidge
    Fake John Galt
    @FakeJohnJaneGalt

    I look forward to a series where SSM reigns supreme and sex/gender changes happen between scenes.

    The season finale will be where the first officer clones itself, in order to have the captain perform a SSM should draw record breaking viewership.

    • #62
  3. Misthiocracy Member
    Misthiocracy
    @Misthiocracy

    Fred Cole:

    Spin:

    Fred Cole: There was talk at one point of a Captain Worf series. Michael Dorn was on board for it too.

    Just what we need: a Klingon with self image problems running a starship.

    Self image problems?

    Worf … never … won … fights.

    Wimpiest Klingon ever.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXrlhN9rPoc

    • #63
  4. Michael Burmeister Inactive
    Michael Burmeister
    @MichaelBurmeister

    “…bipeds with similar technology but ridges on their cheeks or noses”. That or energy beings who use their god-like powers to test humanity/vulcanity for various and sundry reasons.

    • #64
  5. Hartmann von Aue Member
    Hartmann von Aue
    @HartmannvonAue

    Fred Cole:

    Misthiocracy:

    DrewInWisconsin: I would love to see someone seriously pick up the continuity post-DS9.

    I want to see Captain Riker of the USS Titan, thank you very much.

    There was talk at one point of a Captain Worf series. Michael Dorn was on board for it too.

    yeah, I kind of liked that idea. But, alas, nothing came of it.

    • #65
  6. OmegaPaladin Moderator
    OmegaPaladin
    @OmegaPaladin

    I had an idea for a Star Trek series – character sketches, enough script ideas for a season, etc.  It would have been based on elements from numerous series, and used the Burn Notice method of episodic A plot, arc in the B plot.

    Take Star Trek, and scale it up.  There’s a whole galaxy to explore, and many issues to delve into.  What happens to society when we have holodecks everywhere?   When do we cross the line between helping heal genetic problems and making the next Khan?  What happens when you can travel back in time to see history unfold?  Star Trek should keep the social commentary oblique and by analogy, as opposed to beating you over the head with it.

    Pretty much any of my characters could have been LGBT – I honestly don’t think of characters as sexualities first and foremost.  They were politically / ideologically diverse – gets the interpersonal conflict over the dilemma of the week going.

    • #66
  7. Misthiocracy Member
    Misthiocracy
    @Misthiocracy

    You wanna know what I’m really looking forward to in television sci-fi?

    Galaxy Quest – The Series

    http://www.ew.com/article/2015/08/27/galaxy-quest-tv-series-amazon

    • #67
  8. skipsul Inactive
    skipsul
    @skipsul

    Misthiocracy:You wanna know what I’m really looking forward to in television sci-fi?

    Galaxy Quest – The Series

    http://www.ew.com/article/2015/08/27/galaxy-quest-tv-series-amazon

    That would be good, but unless the writing is really top notch, I’d have a tough time picturing them getting more than 2 seasons worth of good scripts before the show either devolves into self mockery, or takes itself too seriously and thus ruins the parody aspect of it.

    • #68
  9. Misthiocracy Member
    Misthiocracy
    @Misthiocracy

    skipsul:

    Misthiocracy:You wanna know what I’m really looking forward to in television sci-fi?

    Galaxy Quest – The Series

    http://www.ew.com/article/2015/08/27/galaxy-quest-tv-series-amazon

    That would be good, but unless the writing is really top notch, I’d have a tough time picturing them getting more than 2 seasons worth of good scripts before the show either devolves into self mockery, or takes itself too seriously and thus ruins the parody aspect of it.

    Many (most?) tv series should run at most two of three seasons, the way Britain does it.

    • #69
  10. Misthiocracy Member
    Misthiocracy
    @Misthiocracy

    The New York Post illustrates perfectly why this new Star Trek series is gonna suck harder than the suckiest bunch of sucks who ever sucked:

    Over the years, Trekkies began looking to Ronald D. Moore, a former “Trek” writer and creator of the fantastic “Battlestar Galactica” reboot, to bring his signature grit and modern take on sci-fi to a new “Star Trek.” But CBS has instead shackled us with the dude who co-wrote “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.”

    http://nypost.com/2015/11/02/cbs-is-already-ruining-the-star-trek-tv-reboot/

    • #70
  11. skipsul Inactive
    skipsul
    @skipsul

    Misthiocracy:The New York Post illustrates perfectly why this new Star Trek series is gonna suck harder than the suckiest bunch of sucks who ever sucked:

    Over the years, Trekkies began looking to Ronald D. Moore, a former “Trek” writer and creator of the fantastic “Battlestar Galactica” reboot, to bring his signature grit and modern take on sci-fi to a new “Star Trek.” But CBS has instead shackled us with the dude who co-wrote “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.”

    http://nypost.com/2015/11/02/cbs-is-already-ruining-the-star-trek-tv-reboot/

    Too bad they don’t have the foresight to do what the current Dr. Who team has done – actually pay for some top notch writers like Neil Gaiman to pen some scripts.  I’m not generally a fan of the new Who, but the Gaiman scripts mesh the best themes of the old series with newer concepts.

    • #71
  12. Douglas Inactive
    Douglas
    @Douglas

    Misthiocracy:

    Worf … never … won … fights.

    I remember a fan bringing this up in an interview with Michael Dorn and he said “Noticed that too, did you?”

    • #72
  13. skipsul Inactive
    skipsul
    @skipsul

    Douglas:

    Misthiocracy:

    Worf … never … won … fights.

    I remember a fan bringing this up in an interview with Michael Dorn and he said “Noticed that too, did you?”

    They let him win 1 token fight.

    • #73
  14. Misthiocracy Member
    Misthiocracy
    @Misthiocracy

    Douglas:

    Misthiocracy:

    Worf … never … won … fights.

    I remember a fan bringing this up in an interview with Michael Dorn and he said “Noticed that too, did you?”

    It’s not Worf’s fault. He had to teach himself martial arts while being raised in a society of commie pacifists.

    • #74
  15. TheRoyalFamily Member
    TheRoyalFamily
    @TheRoyalFamily

    Misthiocracy:Worf … never … won … fights.

    Wimpiest Klingon ever.

    He won plenty of fights. Just not on TNG.

    Also, Picard should have listened to him more. Probably would have saved him from writing condolence letters a time or two, just from the exploding consoles alone.

    • #75
  16. TheRoyalFamily Member
    TheRoyalFamily
    @TheRoyalFamily

    My take: this is going to [try to be] be a fun adventure show with as much action as budget will allow, and the occasional message and moral episode. Just like the original was.  As far as timeline goes, I figure it will be main-timeline (since CBS owns that, and Paramount owns JarJar Trek), probably 10-20 years post-Voyager since that means they can do whatever they want while bringing in the occasional past star for ratings stunts.

    I also predict this will get off the streaming service by the end of a second season, one way or another. It may also become the most pirated show ever…

    • #76
  17. Fred Cole Inactive
    Fred Cole
    @FredCole

    TheRoyalFamily:

    Misthiocracy:Worf … never … won … fights.

    Wimpiest Klingon ever.

    He won plenty of fights. Just not on TNG.

    I second this.

    Go by “By Inferno’s Light” and then say that Worf never won fights.

    • #77
  18. Jamie Lockett Member
    Jamie Lockett
    @JamieLockett

    Fred Cole:

    TheRoyalFamily:

    Misthiocracy:Worf … never … won … fights.

    Wimpiest Klingon ever.

    He won plenty of fights. Just not on TNG.

    I second this.

    Go by “By Inferno’s Light” and then say that Worf never won fights.

    Damn right.

    I yield. I cannot defeat this Klingon. All I can do is kill him. And that no longer holds my interest.

    Also General Martok was one of the greatest characters in any Star Trek show.

    As for Worf not winning fights – Gowron would beg to differ.

    • #78
  19. Fred Cole Inactive
    Fred Cole
    @FredCole

    TheRoyalFamily:I also predict this will get off the streaming service by the end of a second season, one way or another. It may also become the most pirated show ever…

    Nah.  The CBS steaming service is just 6 bucks a month.  My wife had already subscribed and I didn’t even know.

    You’d be right if this was five years ago.  But not in 2017.

    • #79
  20. Jamie Lockett Member
    Jamie Lockett
    @JamieLockett

    Fred Cole:

    TheRoyalFamily:I also predict this will get off the streaming service by the end of a second season, one way or another. It may also become the most pirated show ever…

    Nah. The CBS steaming service is just 6 bucks a month. My wife had already subscribed and I didn’t even know.

    You’d be right if this was five years ago. But not in 2017.

    I won’t pay for the streaming service. I’m sick of every single channel rolling their own service.

    • #80
  21. Fred Cole Inactive
    Fred Cole
    @FredCole

    CBS is odd like that. The other networks throw their stuff up on Hulu.

    • #81
  22. Jamie Lockett Member
    Jamie Lockett
    @JamieLockett

    Fred Cole:CBS is odd like that. The other networks throw their stuff up on Hulu.

    Hulu is awful compared to Netflix and Amazon.

    • #82
  23. Fred Cole Inactive
    Fred Cole
    @FredCole

    How do you figure?

    • #83
  24. Jamie Lockett Member
    Jamie Lockett
    @JamieLockett

    Fred Cole:How do you figure?

    The interface isn’t my favorite and the buffering I get is atrocious.

    • #84
  25. Fred Cole Inactive
    Fred Cole
    @FredCole

    Yeah. Those are fair criticisms. But it’s variety makes up for it.

    • #85
  26. Jamie Lockett Member
    Jamie Lockett
    @JamieLockett

    Fred Cole:Yeah. Those are fair criticisms. But it’s variety makes up for it.

    Bittorrent will remain a thing until the networks figure this stuff out.

    I think there is a market out there for someone to come up with a streaming service aggregation app. I really don’t want to go to 10 different apps to get all my content – its no as easy as switching channels.

    • #86
  27. Peter Gøthgen Member
    Peter Gøthgen
    @PeterGothgen

    There already is a new Star Trek series.  It’s called Renegades.

    • #87
  28. JimGoneWild Coolidge
    JimGoneWild
    @JimGoneWild

    One word: Firefly.

    • #88
  29. TheRoyalFamily Member
    TheRoyalFamily
    @TheRoyalFamily

    Peter Gøthgen:There already is a new Star Trek series. It’s called Renegades.

    Please never mention that abomination again.

    • #89
  30. Misthiocracy Member
    Misthiocracy
    @Misthiocracy

    TheRoyalFamily:

    Misthiocracy:Worf … never … won … fights.

    Wimpiest Klingon ever.

    He won plenty of fights. Just not on TNG.

    Jamie Lockett:As for Worf not winning fights – Gowron would beg to differ.

    Ironically, he often defeated other Klingons but got his butt kicked by humans. Racism.

    • #90
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