When Should the Beating Stop?

 

You may remember Adam Smith. No, not the philosopher — the CFO who took a stand for same-sex marriage and against Chick-Fil-A by filming himself acting like a complete tool at a drive-thru while receiving a complementary glass of water from the young girl working the window.

He posted his righteous indignation video online, it went viral, and his employer showed him the door. Well, according to ABC News, the hits just keep on coming for him. Three years later, he remains unemployed and has been reduced to accepting food stamps to feed his family.

My initial reaction is “Good, serves him right for being such a jerk.” But is this appropriate? When he realized the error of his ways, he made amends. He offered his apology and it was accepted by the young lady he verbally abused. So far he’s lost his livelihood, his home, and a significant portion of his dignity.

When is the punishment over for Mr. Smith? When is enough enough? Perhaps he still lacks the heart change necessary because although he regrets how he did what he did, he does not yet regret the stand he took. I cannot muster significant sympathy for him to wish a different outcome, but perhaps that is because of my heart issues rather than his.

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  1. user_1152 Member
    user_1152
    @DonTillman

    It’s a marvelously funny and entertaining story. And it keeps getting better.

    He’s also written a book, “Million Dollar Cup of Water: Discovering the Wealth in Authenticity“, available on Amazon Kindle, and the “reviews” are funny.  And especially the note at the top that the number of negative reviews is greater than the actual sales of the book.

    Of course we wish him no harm.  But there is so much to this story that doesn’t seem right.

    How the [expletive] did this nimrod become a CFO for a medical equipment manufacturer?  I can’t see that.

    Why hasn’t he been hired by a militantly left wing company?  Like Mozilla, the folks that forced founder Brendan Eich to resign.

    Perhaps another line of work.  He’s perfect for a job as a community organizer.

    For goodness sake, he’s living in Portland now!  The land of Portlandia.  At the very least I would expect to see him working at the “Women and Women First Bookstore” (or the prototype thereof).

    More importantly, though, I sure hope things are going well for Rachel.

    • #31
  2. lesserson Member
    lesserson
    @LesserSonofBarsham

    Fake John Galt:

    lesserson:“When should the beating stop?” If I understand my boss right it’s when morale improves…

    You got one of those too…..

    I have in the past, but I have to admit right now I don’t. It’s definitely something he’d say tongue-in-cheek but he’s a pretty good boss. Just couldn’t pass up the chance to type it…  :)

    • #32
  3. lesserson Member
    lesserson
    @LesserSonofBarsham

    The King Prawn:Another random thought just rattled through my sleep deprived brain: what if he is acting the part of martyr to the cause? The vehemence that motivated him to make and post the video still seems to lurk in him, but he is seeking more socially appropriate means of “hating on the haters.” Such an attitude doesn’t leave much hope for true contrition.

    His statements kind of strike me this way too. I’m sorry I looked like a jerk, but I wasn’t wrong and now nobody will hire me. Who know’s what’s in the guys heart though, besides him.

    • #33
  4. user_44643 Inactive
    user_44643
    @MikeLaRoche

    He reminds me of Jack Nicholson in Five Easy Pieces.

    • #34
  5. The King Prawn Inactive
    The King Prawn
    @TheKingPrawn

    Who know’s what’s in the guys heart though, besides him.

    According to some of the reviews of his book, the whole world can know…for $7.99.

    Here’s some of the back cover blurb:

    After achieving his dream of being financially secure and successful, Adam discovered the cost to his marriage was a sacrifice he was unwilling to make and walked away from a lucrative career.

    Finding balance between work and home, Adam settled into a rewarding life with a job he loved and an expanding family that gave it all meaning . . . until he made the choice to stand up for the rights of someone else.

    So he downsized to $200K/yr+$1M stock options and thinks yelling at a person giving him free water is “stand[ing] up for the rights of someone else”? I’m right back to asshat with this guy.

    • #35
  6. user_3467 Thatcher
    user_3467
    @DavidCarroll

    We know his asshattery was not confined to that single incident, based upon his continued gum flapping.  I am guessing that the Chick-Fil-A incident was merely a precipitating event, not the whole cause of his termination.  I suspect that he was an generally difficult employee with a personality to match, contributing to his current employment situation.

    I am sure glad we are paying to support him, though.  [Sarcasm.]  Without welfare, he would be forced to go into business for himself, if no one would hire him.

    • #36
  7. lesserson Member
    lesserson
    @LesserSonofBarsham

    The King Prawn:

    Who know’s what’s in the guys heart though, besides him.

    According to some of the reviews of his book, the whole world can know…for $7.99.

    Here’s some of the back cover blurb:

    After achieving his dream of being financially secure and successful, Adam discovered the cost to his marriage was a sacrifice he was unwilling to make and walked away from a lucrative career.

    Finding balance between work and home, Adam settled into a rewarding life with a job he loved and an expanding family that gave it all meaning . . . until he made the choice to stand up for the rights of someone else.

    So he downsized to $200K/yr+$1M stock options and thinks yelling at a person giving him free water is “stand[ing] up for the rights of someone else”? I’m right back to asshat with this guy.

    And there you have it. (sigh) I agree, back to square one.

    • #37
  8. Chris Member
    Chris
    @Chris

    Unfortunately for him, being a CFO is a skill set that other smart people can learn and demonstrate competence in.  He’s not the visionary or an R&D wizard and therefore irreplaceable.  He’s extremely good with numbers, but so are lots of other people with no baggage.  There is a role for him somewhere, but odds are it will not be starting back at the top.  A tough lesson indeed.

    • #38
  9. user_138562 Moderator
    user_138562
    @RandyWeivoda

    Perhaps Smith is limiting which companies he is willing to work for.  Since he recommends that people not even have lunch at a restaurant if the president of the chain is opposed to SSM, I’m sure he wouldn’t want to work for a company if any of the executives are opposed to SSM.  Since the country is roughly 50/50 on gay marriage, it might be hard to find a large company where everyone is on the same side.

    • #39
  10. Ball Diamond Ball Member
    Ball Diamond Ball
    @BallDiamondBall

    I agree about feeling the beatings should stop at some point, but when does that woman get her face off the internet?

    This CFO who hadn’t the financial sense to hedge against his own stunt should use his vaunted film skills to do something worthwhile and ride this avalanche up the other side of the valley.

    Anything else and he’s just not trying.

    • #40
  11. Matede Inactive
    Matede
    @MateDe

    Maybe he should get a job at Chick fil-A, and record his experience there. It may bring the change of heart that he needs and everybody loves a redemption story. I think until then, this guy probably won’t get much sympathy from many folks who would likely hire him.

    • #41
  12. user_1030767 Inactive
    user_1030767
    @TheQuestion

    I’d prefer that people get a lot of leeway to say what they think when they’re not at work.  On the other hand, on the issue of same sex marriage, the proponents seem to think that any punishment they can dish out to their opponents is justified.  I really don’t want to see people losing their jobs for supporting same sex marriage, but if SSM activists are going to get their opponents fired and shut down their businesses, we will have to retaliate.

    • #42
  13. No Caesar Thatcher
    No Caesar
    @NoCaesar

    I am not inclined to let by-gones be by-gones, and am more inclined to heap more opprobrium on him .  He made his bed and is emblematic of all that is destructive of our current society.  Let’s remember not only was he a jerk, but he willfully broadcasted his stupidity and jerkiness.  That’s very different than privately screwing up and trying to start anew.

    Since he did not harm or attack me, I have nothing to forgive.  However, in general we are too fast to forgive.  Forgiveness is appropriate only when the offending party has made a full, frank, complete and honest acknowledgment of what they have done wrong, and pleaded for forgiveness.  That does not mean the punishment is waived, it means the offended party forgives and gets on with their life.  True sincerity by both parties can truly put the incident behind them and they get on with a fresh start.  However, the evidence provided indicates this guy is only sorry he got caught and there were consequences.
    The bottom line as an employer, there is no way I want someone with the poor judgment and instability he demonstrated doing finances.  That collection of behavior is just begging for problems.

    • #43
  14. Patrickb63 Coolidge
    Patrickb63
    @Patrickb63

    We, as a collective entity, are not responsible for his actions, his condition, or his continuing problems.  I read about him being on food stamps a few days ago, and then put it out of my mind.  I felt some brief pity for him, but I did not create his problems, he did.  If he begins to show he can be trusted maybe someone will hire him.  But I will accept neither guilt nor responsability for his current plight.  Of course, it sounds like he won’t accept guilt or responsibility either.  And that may be why in three years he has been unable to find a job.

    • #44
  15. MarciN Member
    MarciN
    @MarciN

    I think he’s making it all up. He’s trying to imply that his not being employed is political. Ridiculous. Employers would be terrified of not employing him for that reason. Ridiculous.

    • #45
  16. user_162273 Member
    user_162273
    @ChuckGrady

    Sorry.  No sympathy for him.  In three years he could have started his own accounting business, put that very forgiving wife up front to help him deal with clients.  Or he could have started learning a new skill – website design, baking, dog trainer, small engine repair, welding – something that minimizes his contact with other humans but keeps him off welfare.  He could have turned this adversity into a success story of sorts, set a positive example.  But no, anything less than what he had is apparently beneath his dignity.  How his dignity is preserved while on food stamps I cannot imagine.

    • #46
  17. Songwriter Inactive
    Songwriter
    @user_19450

    Also – seems I read the guy has written a book about his travails – so he is trying to profit from it.  The capitalist in me applauds him. But since he is bragging about his stance and wears his Leftism as a badge of pride, the Conservative in me loathes him.

    • #47
  18. user_1152 Member
    user_1152
    @DonTillman

    Mama Toad:He’s using food stamps to buy $5.99/lb free range chicken in Portland?

    That is brilliant video editing.  I see three jokes there:

    1. The fact that he’s buying chicken, the very stuff that Rachel at Chick-Fil-A serves.

    2. Expensive chicken with an EBT card.

    3. And a reference to the Portlandia skit, “Is the Chicken Local?”:

    • #48
  19. Mama Toad Member
    Mama Toad
    @CBToderakaMamaToad

    Don Tillmann, exactly.

    Peace!

    • #49
  20. Fritz Coolidge
    Fritz
    @Fritz

    Chuck Grady:Sorry. No sympathy for him. In three years he could have started his own accounting business, put that very forgiving wife up front to help him deal with clients. Or he could have started learning a new skill – website design, baking, dog trainer, small engine repair, welding – something that minimizes his contact with other humans but keeps him off welfare. He could have turned this adversity into a success story of sorts, set a positive example. But no, anything less than what he had is apparently beneath his dignity. How his dignity is preserved while on food stamps I cannot imagine.

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Exactly.

    My first thought was, it’s not like he has a felony record or anything, just that he acted like a total jerk. So if he was good enough with numbers and financials to become a CFO,  why doesn’t he open a home-based bookkeeping service? If he really has learned his lesson, then the one-to-one relationships by which such an enterprise grows would support him and his family.

    Many people, I myself, and quite a few people I know, have all had to make one or more complete re-starts in life, sometimes late in life. It ain’t easy, but you just quit whining and do it.

    • #50
  21. Nick Stuart Inactive
    Nick Stuart
    @NickStuart

    When Brendan Eich gets his job back.

    • #51
  22. user_1065645 Member
    user_1065645
    @DaveSussman

    Glad others brought up the Entrepreneurial option. The mans got 4 kids and he’s relying on food stamps?
    Start a business now. Freelance. Get independent gigs. Be a bookkeeper for crisakes!
    No excuse for 3 years on welfare with his skills.
    Lousy example he’s setting for his children.

    • #52
  23. user_494971 Contributor
    user_494971
    @HankRhody

    Until he’s drained his cup to the bitter dregs, there’s no hope for him.

    • #53
  24. AUMom Member
    AUMom
    @AUMom

    My guess is that he is a jerk at all times. When you brutalize folks around you on a regular basis, you get no breaks. I am sorry for his family.

    • #54
  25. Autistic License Coolidge
    Autistic License
    @AutisticLicense

    I don’t hear much gloating here. As others have said, if he found a leftist employer, he could do alright. The Southern Poverty Law Center, the Village Voice, one of those outfits would be glad to have him.

    • #55
  26. Valiuth Member
    Valiuth
    @Valiuth

    The Well of Vengeance has no bottom.

    • #56
  27. Cato Rand Inactive
    Cato Rand
    @CatoRand

    Does anybody else have doubts about whether this stunt from three years ago is the only reason he’s on food stamps?  I mean, I know it’s been a slow recovery and whatnot, but he’s young, not obviously disabled, apparently reasonably educated, etc.  You don’t usually get from there to food stamps with just one mistake.  I don’t doubt he lost his then existing job because of the video, but nothing for three years?  There’s gotta be more to the story.

    • #57
  28. Raw Prawn Inactive
    Raw Prawn
    @RawPrawn

    The thing that surprises me about this story is that this bully’s wife has not taken the kids and split. He bullied a Chick-fill-A employee so its more than likely he bullies the wife and kids. Stokholm Syndrome? Battered Wife Syndrome?

    I’m certain that if, say a pro-lifer, were to use tactics similar to the ones Adam Smith used he would be hounded by social workers for the remainder of his days.

    • #58
  29. inmateprof Inactive
    inmateprof
    @inmateprof

    No Caesar:I am not inclined to let by-gones be by-gones, and am more inclined to heap more opprobrium on him . He made his bed and is emblematic of all that is destructive of our current society. Let’s remember not only was he a jerk, but he willfully broadcasted his stupidity and jerkiness. That’s very different than privately screwing up and trying to start anew.

    Since he did not harm or attack me, I have nothing to forgive. However, in general we are too fast to forgive. Forgiveness is appropriate only when the offending party has made a full, frank, complete and honest acknowledgment of what they have done wrong, and pleaded for forgiveness. That does not mean the punishment is waived, it means the offended party forgives and gets on with their life. True sincerity by both parties can truly put the incident behind them and they get on with a fresh start. However, the evidence provided indicates this guy is only sorry he got caught and there were consequences. The bottom line as an employer, there is no way I want someone with the poor judgment and instability he demonstrated doing finances. That collection of behavior is just begging for problems.

    I agree.  Is he sorry for the way he treated the lady working the drive-thru, or is he sorry about the fact that he lost his money and lifestyle.  I would assume if there were no consequences for his actions, he would continue his silly behavior.

    I have done stupid things, and said stupid things, but I always asked for forgiveness privately, and didn’t make a show of my apology.  That’s where I think he messed up.  He should have gone back and apologized to the woman, not another stupid YouTube video.

    • #59
  30. The Great Adventure! Inactive
    The Great Adventure!
    @TheGreatAdventure

    There aren’t any Chick-Fil-A’s in Portland. I’ll chip in for one-way tickets for him & his family (bus) to a city that has them.

    • #60
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