The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
It's probably wishful thinking, but I'm noticing something happening in the culture. Here are the dots, and here's how I connect them:
1. It's official: for a huge number of students, college is a waste of time. Not just because they could be out in the world, learning on the job. But because college is, in many many ways, an expensive, coddling resort. From Yahoo News:
A study of more than 2,300 undergraduates found 45 percent of students show no significant improvement in the key measures of critical thinking, complex reasoning and writing by the end of their sophomore years.
Not much is asked of students, either. Half did not take a single course requiring 20 pages of writing during their prior semester, and one-third did not take a single course requiring even 40 pages of reading per week.
The findings are in a new book, "Academically Adrift: Limited Learning on College Campuses," by sociologists Richard Arum of New York University and Josipa Roksa of the University of Virginia.
2. Tough parents demand a lot from their kids, and the kids are grateful for it. In her now-famous WSJ piece, Why Chinese Mothers are Superior, Amy Chua lays it down:
In one study of 50 Western American mothers and 48 Chinese immigrant mothers, almost 70% of the Western mothers said either that "stressing academic success is not good for children" or that "parents need to foster the idea that learning is fun." By contrast, roughly 0% of the Chinese mothers felt the same way.
What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until you're good at it. To get good at anything you have to work, and children on their own never want to work, which is why it is crucial to override their preferences. This often requires fortitude on the part of the parents because the child will resist; things are always hardest at the beginning, which is where Western parents tend to give up.
So her kid must hate her, right? Not so fast. From the NYPost, Sophia Chua-Rubinfeld, her daugher, responds:
I admit it: Having you as a mother was no tea party. There were some play dates I wish I’d gone to and some piano camps I wish I’d skipped. But now that I’m 18 and about to leave the tiger den, I’m glad you and Daddy raised me the way you did.
I think #1 and #2 are related, in a very big way. Again, maybe wishful thinking, but I'm detecting in the first cracks in the 1950's and 1960's philosophy of child-raising and education. Children need to be praised. Everyone goes to college. The most important thing is to build up self-esteem. All of that nonsense seems to be under attack -- and thank God! -- as Americans face a more competitive and cutthroat world marketplace.
Leaving college with a degree in Sociology and $100,000 in debt no longer seems smart, let alone a birthright. Teachers' unions no longer have the moral high ground -- not even in Boston! -- and one of the most popular politicians in America has made teachers union bashing an indoor Olympic sport:
And then I re-watched this artifact from the 2008 campaign -- barely three years old -- and it somehow seems hilariously dated, like leisure suits and hippie chicks who say "groovy."
I connect the dots this way: the culture is turning away from soft. It's turning away from sociology degrees, feel-good parenting, sagging schools, and political daydreaming. It's turning back to toughness.
If I were running for president, I'd make note of that.
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Comments :
Aug '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Rob Long:
Again, maybe wishful thinking, but I'm detecting in the first cracks in the 1950's and 1960's philosophy of child-raising and education. Children need to be praised...
But children do need to be praised when they do something praiseworthy. Just like they need punishment when they do something blameworthy.
The behavior you reward, you get more of. That's a basic conservative principle, no?
May '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Chris Christie's popularity speaks strongly for the potential of John Bolton in 2012.
Aug '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
When you don't reward your children's outstanding performance (not that the reward need be lavish, simple parental affection will do), you discourage them from pursuing that outstanding performance, just as when you don't discipline bad behavior, you encourage them to pursue more bad behavior.
I had parents who, because they thought I was a "genius" and therefore everything ought to come easily to me, never thought to reward me (simple words of appreciation would have sufficed) for outstanding accomplishments. When I accomplished something outstanding, their reaction was, "Oh, that's just Midge. It's no big deal." Or they'd find some detail to pick on.
Suffice it to say, when great productive effort goes just as unrewarded as lack of effort, you feel considerably less incentive to make an effort. It's true in the economy. It's true in family life.
Edited on Jan 18, 2011 at 10:43amRe: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Rob, that commercial--that is beyond creepy. I missed that at the time. Yes, it seems dated, and everything else you say. It's also vulgar and grotesque beyond words. What were those parents thinking, allowing their children to be exploited like that?
Jun '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Yeah, Rob, you really baited me on that one. It almost made me sick. Give one of those TV-type warnings next time!
May '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Few things have made my flesh crawl like that video. Not quite the production values of Triumph of the Will but, well you get the idea.
What were those parents thinking? Not much of anything, I'm afraid. They were just being swept along by celebrity posing as politics and taking their poor kids along with them.
May '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
My dad was the same way. His immediate response to everything was criticism. I sympathize. My mom was exactly the opposite, which is also problematic because cheap praise is fleeting. A balance is good.
Odds are, their home environments were much the same.
Oct '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Rob, you may be the canary in a coal mine when it comes to the demise of squishiness. Say on, sir, say on!
Aug '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
My oldest daughter has been weighing whether or not to continue in grad school in the second year, as she has landed a job and now running the restaurant that hired her five months ago, I could only advise her to make sure that she took accounting at some point for general purposes. All the courses in public administration that are built to process people right into the government really irked her. I took such pride in her indignation when she complained about it.
They throw money at the kids , getting 20 k in loans was a no-brainer. And the kids seriously doubt if they will have to pay it back !! They're filling up the colleges with debt heavy students. Yet they're going after the for-profits because they actually produce people with job skills like HVAC . Is it because they're not part of the massive student loan takeover ?
Edited on Jan 18, 2011 at 10:51amNov '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Here is the title for your next post, Rob:
"Rob Long is Cracking: A Retreat from Squishiness"
Oct '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
So very creepy - I can't believe that the left got away with employing that tactic. The only good news that I can see is that they've exhausted the "Obama hopey-changey/tabula rasa" meme and 2012 will have to be based on results. Either his results or the results of the GOP-led house.
I think Rob's right - the culture is shifting back and conservatives have to act immediately to seize the initiative (if that sort of language isn't too martial).
May '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Aaron Miller
My dad was the same way. His immediate response to everything was criticism. I sympathize. My mom was exactly the opposite, which is also problematic because cheap praise is fleeting. A balance is good.
Odds are, their home environments were much the same. · Jan 18 at 10:44am
Ahh little grasshoppers. In time you too will see that parenting is a lot harder than it looks.
May '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Lady Kurobara: Here is the title for your next post, Rob:
"Rob Long is Cracking: A Retreat from Squishiness" · Jan 18 at 10:54am
Nothing a good facial and some Ashtanga yoga can't cure.
Nov '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Kervinlee
Few things have made my flesh crawl like that video. Not quite the production values of Triumph of the Will but, well you get the idea.
What were those parents thinking? Not much of anything, I'm afraid. They were just being swept along by celebrity posing as politics and taking their poor kids along with them.
Dave Molinari: Yeah, Rob, you really baited me on that one. It almost made me sick. Give one of those TV-type warnings next time!
There is historical precedent for that, you know:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hitler_Jugend
Do not cry foul; it is exactly the same thing — political indoctrination of the young.
Sep '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
I think you are quite right Rob. My oldest daughter, now a senior in college, took a lot of liberal arts courses as she is an excellent writer and proficient in languages. She wanted to work in International Aid or in the State Department. Seems she has found that they are only hiring Ivy League grads (elitism on parade), that it is extremely competitive, and she also has discovered that "helping" developing countries is a lot more problematic than it looks.
Now she will return home after graduation to take science courses at a local Community College so she can ultimately become a nurse/midwife.
Aug '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Trace Urdan
Aaron Miller
My dad was the same way. His immediate response to everything was criticism. I sympathize. My mom was exactly the opposite, which is also problematic because cheap praise is fleeting. A balance is good.
Ahh little grasshoppers. In time you too will see that parenting is a lot harder than it looks.
Oh, of that I'm sure.
But we can at least try to learn from our parents how to parent, right? Using them as examples of both what to do and what not to do.
Oct '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Lady Kurobara
Kervinlee
Few things have made my flesh crawl like that video. Not quite the production values of Triumph of the Will but, well you get the idea.
What were those parents thinking? Not much of anything, I'm afraid. They were just being swept along by celebrity posing as politics and taking their poor kids along with them.
Dave Molinari: Yeah, Rob, you really baited me on that one. It almost made me sick. Give one of those TV-type warnings next time!
There is historical precedent for that, you know:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hitler_Jugend
Do not cry foul; it is exactly the same thing — political indoctrination of the young. · Jan 18 at 11:07am
In other words, liberal fascism. Hmmm, now where have I heard that term before...?
Oct '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Lady Kurobara: Here is the title for your next post, Rob:
"Rob Long is Cracking: A Retreat from Squishiness" · Jan 18 at 10:54am
"Rob Long: Father of the Moderate Reformation"
Jan '11
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
A few years ago, I turned on the telly and saw an aerial view of a large flock of children all dancing in perfect synchronicity. I immediately thought, oh, this is probably in preparation for the Chinese Olympics. I couldn't see faces; why did I think that? I saw discipline and skill. Compare and contrast to baggy-panted hipsters getting their degree in some sort of "studies". I kindly refer to those as BS degrees - leading to nothing. As others have pointed out - you wouldn't tell an 18 year old to borrow money and choose $100K worth of stocks unguided, it seems immoral to tell an 18 year old that he can borrow money and blindly choose foolish degrees.
Nov '10
Re: The Culture is Cracking: A Return to Toughness
Midget Faded Rattlesnake
Trace Urdan
Aaron Miller
My dad was the same way. His immediate response to everything was criticism. I sympathize. My mom was exactly the opposite, which is also problematic because cheap praise is fleeting. A balance is good.
Ahh little grasshoppers. In time you too will see that parenting is a lot harder than it looks.
Oh, of that I'm sure.
But we can at least try to learn from our parents how to parent, right? Using them as examples of both what to do and what not to do.
For Aaron and Midge: Are you aware that Hillary Clinton's father was hyper-critical? Hillary was an overachiever in school, but if she brought home a test paper with a score of 104 (thanks to extra credit questions), her Dad would rip her head off. "You worthless bitch! Why didn't you score 105? You good for nothing, etc, etc, etc... " He was not joking, either. I cannot help feeling that it deeply affected Hillary in some way, contributing to the flawed personality we see today.