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Toward a Hipper Ricochet
Folks, Ricochet has an image problem. The political Right has long been seen as a bunch of old fuddy-duddies who wouldn’t know a B3 (blah, blah, blah) from a BIH (burn in hell). If you were young and hip, would you want to join such a square web site? Bro, get real!
So what we’ve got to do is change our image. I am hipper and doper than you, so I can tell you what we need to do.
First, we need to adopt hipper names and pseudonyms. She, your new Ricochet name is Cis. Ms. RightAngles, you’re now Ms. LeftAngles. Nanda Pajama-Tantrum, you need something shorter and snappier, perhaps The Pajama Man. Susan, you’re now Quinn the Eskimo. Kate, you’re Shaneka Brown. RushBabe, you’re The CheBabe. Arahant, from now on you’re merely Jose. Front Seat Cat, you’re Shotgun Cat. My new name is I’ve Got a Tat on My Neck. Midget Faded Rattlesnake and Boss Mongo, you two can keep your names. They’re cool enough as it is.
The rest of you: Come up with your own hip name. I can’t do everything for you.
Next, we need to update our language. Right now it smacks of nerdiness and linear thinking. We can do better than that, posse, perhaps by gratuitously inserting the phrase “I’m hip to your groove” every now and then. Wait, that sounds like it comes right out of the sixties. I’m going to have to Google this.
Ok, I’m back again. Here’s a cool phrase I found: “Bible, my squad is phat and faddy.” Translation for the squares: “Truthfully, my friends are hot and and up-to-date.” So from now on, please insert “Bible, my squad is phat and faddy” every now and then. If it matters to you where in your discourse you place the hip phrase, that only means you’re still thinking in a linear mode. Chill out, squad.
In the Ricochet biographies, you can no longer say that you’re from Kansas or Iowa. That’s Flyover Country, guys. From now on we’re from San Fran, La La Land, or Tribeca.
We also need to change our avatars. Here’s a photo of an anonymous hipster, suitably androgynous. We can all use it until we can come up with new and hip avatars of our own.
Listen, it’s not like I’m asking you to get a tat, wear your hair in a bun, or sport a pork pie hat—though if my suggestions in this post don’t work, you may have to do those things.
In the meantime, if we put into effect my suggestions, Ricochet will be attracting crowds of Millennials, Gen Z’s, Centennials, Bicentennials, and Nanocentennials. Our site, Bible, will then be phat and faddy.
If you can think or other ways to attract the young and cool crowd, I’d like to hear them, though I seriously doubt that you’re as hip as I am, so your suggestions will probably be as square as you are. (If you doubt this, look at the clothes you’re now wearing.)
Endnote: As usual, I submitted this post to my wife Marie for her approval. She said, “Kent, it’s not all that clever.” I think she says things like that to crush my spirit.
Published in General
I went to a large high school in PG county Maryland in the late 60’s. We weren’t allowed to wear jeans.
We weren’t either, and the girls had to wear skirts. And if your skirt was too short you got sent to the Dean’s office. Never mind how I know this.
Disappointing all the guys, I’m guessing.
I’m all for single sex schools. Miniskirts were the rage when I was in junior high. It was hard to concentrate when girls’ skirts were short enough to show the tops of their stockings.
Word up!
Ms. Tabby, I’m pretty sure that Ms. RightAngles’ photo is doctored to add the tats.
Well DUH yeah. I’m so boring I don’t even have pierced ears.
Oh I assumed so (since I have seen other photos of Ms. RightAngles). I was illustrating what I see as a problem with extensive tattoos – we see the tattoos and not the person under the tattoos.
Depending on dress, I could be persuaded to see something under the tattoos.
Can I be Granny Shaneka?
My son sometimes calls me MomDude or MomDawg. Maybe I can be GrannyDawg.
Or GrannyDude, since that sounds sort of Trans-y, too?
I so agree, mostly for girls. They close doors on themselves forever. Here are the 2 pictures I used above:
Evening Kent,
Everyone knows a B3 is a Hammond organ. And smile when you say “bite me, geezer”. Also as the mayor says in Music Man what your emphasis, or your punctuation, or both.
I am having trouble taking my picture of “Smiling Reagan in a Cowboy Hat” and making that my new profile picture. Any suggestions?
You can pm the Reagan picture to me and I’ll do it.
Evening, Jim. Here on he West Coast, it’s 4 p.m. I’m in the kitchen on my iPad, and my wife is just coming down to start dinner. We traditionally have “breakfast” (eggs, sausage, pancakes, grits, etc.) for Sunday dinner.
You must know keyboards to recognize a B3 Hammond. I don’t understand that last sentence. Is there a typo in there somewhere?
Where are you having the trouble? What steps are you following?
This would have worked out much better for me, Kent, if you’d gotten ahold of me 25 years ago.
And the fact that according to you, Susan gets to be Quinn The Eskimo Man really slams my inner Innuit sensibilities.
L8er.
If we find out you’ve been stealing her wind, we women will … well, you know.
GrannyDude is sorta hip and transy, but I think I’d go with Granny Dawg.
Or why they did this.
When I go to pictures at the Ricochet site, I press the button for “Select Files”. I then go to my downloads but after pressing the button nothing happens.
So should I change my avatar from Hops to Marijuana Bud? Maybe change my nom de plume to Panama Red?
What Is Hip?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6PZPQGj4K2M
Lash LaRoche 😎
Sorry Kent but I just can’t; that election still hurts deeply.
Carol, I couldn’t figure out what you’re saying. So I showed it to Marie and she didn’t know either. We’re both terribly old, though, and haven’t kept up with idioms that have popped up in the last thirty years or so. We stay in the house a lot and nap.
“Stealing her wind’? Wha?
And what will you women do? Sounds sexy, but as I say, I’m terribly old.
As you can see, I got it done!