Kindergarten (1957)

35 years ago, there was a famous essay by Robert Fulghum entitled “All I Really Need To Know I Learned in Kindergarten.” I endorse everything in that essay, and I wish to supplement it. The lessons did not come solely from teachers. Classmates and parents gave lessons too.

My kindergarten started in 1957.

I learned that I was a citizen of the United States of America. I pledged allegiance to its flag every morning. I learned that I was very lucky to be an American citizen. Millions of children around the world wished they could be Americans because being an American was the best. One big reason it was the best was that, as an American child, I could grow up to be anything. Doctor, lawyer, policeman, fireman, president of a company or president of the entire country. Even at age five I understood that family connections and family money were important, but they were only two of many factors. (My family had neither money nor connections.)

In America, the most important factor was merit. There were no guarantees, but the greater the merit, the greater the chances of success.

In my five-year-old mind, merit had two components: abilities and character. People were born with abilities, and abilities were not handed out equally. Everyone was different. Practice and work could improve abilities, but there were limits. When it came to abilities, life was not fair.

Character, on the other hand, was up to me, and to everyone else. We could all have good character. I was twelve years away from hearing the term, but character was not a zero-sum game. Character was a choice we all could make. Character was fair. I could equal anyone in character.

I also learned that I would get older and one day mom and dad would kick me out. I would have to get a job and support myself, so the merit thing started now. The better I did at kindergarten, the better prepared I would be for first grade, and on and on it would go.

My two older brothers ensured that I learned to be competitive before kindergarten. But, in kindergarten, I actually got to win now and then. I learned about winning and how to act afterwards. I won a fair share. I would have been an arrogant first grader, but I was also taught that humility was part of good character.

I learned to care about others and about how to be a friend.

Because Dad was in the Navy, he taught me that adults would always be impressed whenever I added the words “sir” or “ma’am” after Yes or No. He was right.

Here is what I didn’t learn. I did not learn anything that would concern the word gender. Half my class were girls, half were boys. I had no trouble telling them apart. I did not learn where babies came from, nor did I learn anything about sexual attraction. I did not learn anything about race. I noticed some people had darker skin than mine, but no one talked about it in front of me.

Most important, I did not learn that the world owed me anything. If I failed, I failed. If others succeeded more than me, good for them. Anger and jealousy were bad character traits.

I agree with Robert Fulghum. Everything I needed to know, I learned in kindergarten. My only wish is that my grandchildren have the same kindergarten as Robert Fulghum and I had.

G-Pub