Social Media Warning Labels

Governor Kathy Hochul of the renowned Empire State has signed into law a bill to compel social media sites to display a public service announcement:

Governor Kathy Hochul negotiated a chapter amendment and signed legislation that will require social media platforms to display labels warning of the dangerous impact certain features can have on young users’ mental health. Legislation S4505/A5346, under the chapter amendment, requires social media platforms that offer addictive feeds, auto play or infinite scroll to post warning labels on their platforms. This legislation builds on the Governor’s ongoing efforts to address the youth mental health crisis statewide.

She could have drafted policies to forbid sexual grooming and indoctrination in the public schools, to keep violent offenders in jail or cooperate with ICE in the removal of illegal aliens engaged in criminal activity, but this was her top priority. Her number one agenda item. Her yuge, yuge legacy bid. For child health. While she braces for the emergence of a thousand Nick Shirleys to publicize the (soon to be alleged) fraud and abuse occurring across the renowned Empire State of New York.

It is clear from reviewing her work product that the governor requires some assistance in framing effective social media warning labels. I think Ricochet is just the community to provide sage, expert guidance in this area. Here are a few to get started:

• Kleptocracies are harmful for children and other living things
• Report to your parents anyone telling you not to tell your parents anything
• Minnesota’s welfare scandal is just a racist psyop
• Tim Walz will be the new Captain America in Avengers: Doomsday
• Your sex is something assigned to you at birth by the evil religionists
• Have you finished your homework?
• You should be reading a book

Have at it. Kathy needs us! The kids need us! It's for the children!