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Madame Tex and I are 63 and 66, respectively. We don’t have children although we are close to some of our nieces and nephews. Our home is on a large tract of land. The house was built in 1952, on a large ranch that was subdivided in the 90s. We have added to the original acreage. The water system (well, storage tank, pumps, etc) was already somewhat complicated, but since then we have added buildings with water and power. Even two complete septic systems and the electric power come off of two different utility line feeds.
I got to thinking about all the times we had to figure out where electrical and water lines ran and what a pain it was. So I started making diagrams and writing a long narrative explaining how all the stuff works. Now I have it all in a binder and I’m trying to figure out where to put it in case we unexpectedly shuffle off this mortal coil. I figure someone will end up with this place and I’d sure like to save them the trouble we went through.
We tell people to put DNRs and medication lists on the refrigerator so we can find them in case of medical emergencies. I’m not sure I’m ready to commit to that degree yet.
Everything is in electronic format so maybe we need a “in case of death” flash drive. I already sent my sister-in-law a spreadsheet with the combinations to the gun safes and info on all the guns. I hope I’m not the only boomer worrying about this.
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First of all - commit to making well thought out wills, drafted by a capable estate tax attorney. Otherwise, absent known descendants the state will enjoy your equity. That will drafting process will help identify some things to do, particular to your facts, and you can develop your own timeline for working through them. It’s hardly too soon to have durable powers of attorney for health care, following the TX guidelines. Accidents happen.
The fact that you’re documenting the property aspects says you’re quite ready to consider (not worry about) aging. You’ll probably have to update it all every couple of decades to go. It won’t hurt. Doesn’t hurt to apply your professional discipline to personal matters.
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The wills are good but of course we will need to make changes as the beneficiaries and executor age.
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A flash drive can get lost, hard drives can die, all are losable, might get damaged in a fire, or you might not have the cabling in the future.
I use a Google Drive account to store all sorts of family and house related things; paint colors, plumbing hardware details, various documents, etc. Nothing financial.
It's free, you can control access, it's pretty trustworthy.
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Massachusetts is one of the few states in the country that does not allow legally binding "living wills." Instead, they use healthcare proxies. I have always admired the state for going that route. It makes the most sense to me.
With that thought in mind, I would avoid a do-not-resuscitate (DNR) standing order because it sometimes confuses a healthcare emergency situation. It's far better to have a designated proxy to make healthcare decisions for you.
My husband and I are each other's proxy. And we talk to each other.
If there are no other major healthcare problems, it would be good to be resuscitated in most situations simply because the field of cardiology has seen tremendous advances over the last two decades. It's very possible that whatever problem caused the heart attack could be solved. It's worth a try.
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Neither of us needs a DNR right now. It’s just something we deal with daily. And most families are way underprepared. I’ve walked into a full arrest where family members literally asked if they could sign one right then so we didn’t have to break all of grandpa’s ribs. That one was on Christmas Day.
It doesn’t matter if it’s a DNR or medical power of attorney; unless it’s properly signed and presented to us we are going to follow our protocols and work that patient hard. If you ever saw it you’d run to make sure your documents were up to date and available.
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