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[Disclaimer: The point of a granddad hypothetical is not to necessarily be realistic. It could be something so stupid, so outrageous, that you think, “Why are we granddads even wasting our time talking about it?”]
Now that I’ve put that issue aside, here is the hypothetical:
Suppose you found out (via the grandmom) that your daughter just texted that she was taking your two grandchildren to Nordstrom’s for a face painting class.
OK. That’s easy. You must admit that neither you nor your wife is a certified trained face-painting educator, with some credits toward a Master’s Degree in it.
Now on the other hand, it is true that in the old days (before a week ago last Thursday), parents of 6- and 4-year-olds assumed that any decent grandparent, given such a low-pressure assignment, could simply fake it, and reaffirm their epic stature in the minds of the little ones.
But never mind. This hypothetical is not about your own flesh and blood paying good money to a giant corporate retail chain to teach their kids face-painting.
It is about your grown daughter, hypothetically, mentioning that she is taking the kids to Nordstrom’s (also) for a class in shoe-tying.
Shoe-tying. That’s what I said.
I’m sorry. I cannot finish this post right now. I am too upset. Maybe tomorrow.
Discussion (25)
CONTRIBUTOR
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I weep for today's parents.
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What's wrong with Velcro?
CHARTER MEMBER
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Thank you! I had to explain why Velcro was a sign of parental neglect and social awkwardness. Once I broke mom from using Velcro, the kids fell right in line.
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The real question is, why aren't they wearing cowboy boots?
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Because the red firemen's boots are hot.
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