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September 17, 2025 at 6:20 PM

Silly Burgers

Andrew Miller
@AndrewMiller

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I like a slice of processed cheese on a beef burger. Of all the things called processed, it is the one I like the best (provided it’s still cheese) – add ketchup, mustard, and pickled gherkin to taste. A man’s burger is his own. As examples go, it may be silly, but it tastes good. And that slice of processed cheese adds an indefinable something.

The mistake of civilisation as a whole was not to stop at burgers. That is my thesis, and I shall defend it against all comers. Some things work well when processed (within their limits). Slices of cheese, yes. People, no. If only this simple maxim were applied more often, the world would be a happier place, says I.

To take the example that in some ways comes before the cheeseburger, finding a job – the world was a happier place when there was room for human discretion. People were easier to talk to, too. And you could find things in the shops that felt at least halfway real.

I’m sure you can think of your own examples. In a ruthlessly digital, automated, processed world, there seems to be less room for life.

More and more, I find myself asking: Where did all the adventures go? The heroes, the happy endings, friendship, true love – miracles – let alone beauty, enchantment, magic, and belief. It was all here not so long ago.

It wasn’t the slice of cheese on top exactly, but it was a world you could be human in, more or less. It had a definite hopeful quality about it. And you had the slice of cheese too, although it’s not about the cheese. You might say it’s about being able to play silly burgers, and enjoying it.

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Discussion (97)

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    Arahant@Arahant·1y

    Did someone say cheese?

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    Arahant@Arahant·1y
    Andrew Miller (View Post):

    The mistake of civilisation as a whole was not to stop at burgers. That is my thesis, and I shall defend it against all comers. Some things work well when processed (within their limits). Slices of cheese, yes. People, no.

    Uh, Andrew? You haven't been eating people again, have you?

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    John H.@JohnH·1y

    I am astonished that the tag "Living Life with Relish" has never been used before.

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    Sisyphus@Sisyphus·1y
    ReplyingtoJohn H.

    John H. (View Comment):

    I am astonished that the tag “Living Life with Relish” has never been used before.

    Thankfully, Andrew has recognized and rectified the omission. Well done.

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    Andrew Miller@AndrewMiller·1y
    ReplyingtoArahant

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Did someone say cheese?

    Gouda you to stop by.

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