Quote of The Day: Lies, Damned Lies

The trouble with lying and deceiving is that their efficiency depends entirely upon a clear notion of the truth that the liar and deceiver wishes to hide.-- Hannah Arendt Honesty is more than not lying. It is truth telling, truth speaking, truth living, and truth loving. --James E. Faust

I couldn’t resist using both of these quotations, because they both describe my dislike for anyone who lies, and the reasons why I don’t indulge in lying myself. The first one demonstrates how complicated lying can be, because people almost always have to tell additional lies to cover their footprints. From what I understand, you have to be pretty smart to be a good liar! I don’t have the time, energy or inclination to hide things from others: not only is it too much trouble and wrong, but frankly I find that saving my rear end isn’t worth the raging of my conscience.

The second quotation, however, spoke more closely to my own personal beliefs about lying. Each phrase describes an attribute slightly different from the rest, and I believe all of them are important.

Truth telling is about making sure that I have described objectively what the truth is. I do my best to represent the facts, obvious and subtle, that are entailed in a situation, whether I like the truth or not.

Truth speaking is expressing what I believe to be true, even if my opinion might not be popular. It is being willing to hold my ground when I believe I am in the right. It’s about not being afraid when people push back. And yet at the same time, it means listening to the other person, just in case I am wrong. I always want to be willing to change my positions when I am wrong.

Truth living means living as much as possible according to my morals and values. For me, this is one of the most difficult to follow at times, because a part of me doesn’t want to be so disciplined and committed in my life. Sometimes I just want to prop up my feet, eat chocolate chip cookies, and read a good book. It also means that I will persuade myself to do things I don’t especially enjoy, like making a telephone call, or washing the dishes, or calling a repairman!

And truth loving is the last, but in many ways the most important. It means loving to have people in my life who believe in truth and integrity just as I do. It means meeting my commitments and following through on obligations. It means valuing my relationships and honoring them in a way that is loving and positive.

I’m not always successful at my efforts not to lie, usually because life interferes and I don’t want to antagonize another person. Also, some people think they have to tell the ugly truth to a person who is not prepared to hear it, and who will be devastated by their words, when no positive outcome is forthcoming.

But, except for an occasional white lie, I do my best to tell the truth.