Acknowledging the Passage of Time

No, this is not a post about Kamala Harris or her word salads. In fact, it is a poignant reflection on the aging process that my husband and I are experiencing, along with the gifts of our encounters on our recent vacation. We experienced a kind of acknowledgement of our maturity, of the years that have passed, and gained a sense of the limited time we have ahead of us. It was both surprising, touching, and enlightening.

A couple of weeks ago we left for our first American Cruise Lines cruise to visit historical sites on Chesapeake Bay and the Potomac River. Most on board were seniors, so differences in age were minimal. Many of the others, however, had limited mobility, requiring walkers and canes, struggling with overweight conditions and hearing limitations. I was constantly reminded that at least I had eschewed vanity and had been fitted with hearing aids that let me listen to podcasts—a bonus! Otherwise, we realized that our fitness gave us the freedom to walk around and see the sites.

When the cruise was over, we spent two days in Washington, DC. My main goal was for us to walk the National Mall and see the memorials again. I never tire of walking up the stairs to the Lincoln Memorial, although Jerry (due to his breathing limitations) watched me from below. I’m always moved by the statue, and feel a sense of reverence and admiration in those moments. I’m always stirred by the nearby war memorials, the wall of names for men lost in Vietnam and the expressions on the faces of the soldiers of the Korean War.

I also realized my own limitations after walking for several hours. In spite of walking and exercising in the gym regularly, I was exhausted by the end of the day. My legs and hips ached, and I couldn’t help but be grateful that I had walked the mall, because I didn’t know if I would be willing to do it again. Surprisingly, we both seemed to recover after a good night’s sleep.

We also found people being extraordinarily kind and helpful during this trip. When we went to the Metro, Jerry showed his tickets from several years ago, and an employee couldn’t help chuckling (Jerry assumed they wouldn’t work in the terminals). But the man told us about the senior cards we would buy that were half the price of regular tickets; then he walked us down two flights of escalators to a trailer where we could purchase the tickets, and let the ticket clerk know why we were there. Before he left us, he reminded me of the rickety stairs that led into the trailer, and we thanked him profusely. We didn’t expect such generosity in DC, and didn’t know if it was some new training under Trump or our gray hair.

Later on in DC, we decided to try to visit the Capitol Building. We weren’t optimistic without reservations, but we asked one of the Capitol policemen where we should go to try. He pointed to the lines of people down a flight of stairs and then proceeded to walk us there, offering to see if one line might be shorter than the other. And then he wished us a good day. (The tour was awesome.)

A younger couple offered us their front seats on a shuttle bus, and another volunteered their seats at an airport fast-food restaurant as they were leaving.

We talked about our reactions to these acts of kindness and generosity. Were they treating us in this manner because of training? Because of a respect for senior citizens? Because we looked fragile? (I think this last one is the least likely) Because of the growing need to connect with others genuinely and compassionately?

I’m so glad that we’ve worked so hard at staying healthy and fit, so that we can appreciate life so richly. And I’m so glad that with all the negative news these days, I can see and enjoy the beauty and warmth in others.