Never Trump, Ever Wrong - A Belated Review of ‘Make Russia Great Again’

I'm the first to admit, to my sorrow, that I'm no Seawriter. I'm not reviewing a new book, but one that's been out for over four years. I didn't set out to read this book, let alone review it, but here we are.

Several weeks ago, in preparation for a move, I took a flight out to Ohio and read books before returning. So, I stopped at a bookstore and bought Christopher Buckley's Make Russia Great Again (at a substantial discount from the original price). I've very much enjoyed some of CB's work in the past, such as Little Green Men, Florence of Arabia, and especially the very fine Thank You for Smoking (which was made into a decent film.)

I knew Buckley was a Never Trumper and thought that would figure into the book. But there is plenty about Trump that is funny and I've laughed at satire of Trump. I voted for Trump in 2020 and 2024 (voted for no one in 2016) but I hoped the book might still amuse.

It did not.

The novel was published in 2020, well before the election and some other significant incidents. (There is a single reference to Covid in the book, but there is no hint of the great impact that virus would make on the world.) Here are the key plots in the novel:

1. Trump won the 2016 election through Russian interference.
2. The intelligence agencies of the United States (who uncovered the Russian interference in our election) are extremely honest and competent.
3. "Mike Pants" is the clever alias for Vice President "Mike Pence" in the novel. And he was a Satanist in his youth.
4. Donald Trump, as judge in the 2014 Miss Universe competition, coerced contestants into sex with promises that each would win the contest. These sexual trysts were filmed, opening the President to threats of blackmail. When one of the women threatened to go public with this information, Trump encouraged a Russian mobster to keep her quiet. She died mysteriously.
5. Trump is a complete narcissistic idiot, barely able to follow conversations and with no compassion for anyone other than himself.
6. Trump wins the 2020 election.

There is obviously more to the book, but these are the things I'd like to discuss.

First of all, Buckley should have been able to know the hoax of Russian interference on Trump's behalf had been completely debunked. But Buckley is looking to tell a story of Trump leading an administration that was subservient to the whims of Vladimir Putin. The facts would kill the central premise of the book. (Funny how Putin invaded Ukraine when Biden was in office but not during Trump's term. I wonder why that was...)

Secondly, the incompetence of our intelligence services was also quite apparent when this book was written. So, when Buckley writes in the book that all of our intelligence services confirmed that Russian espionage led to the election of Donald Trump, it should be a laugh line, but it is not.

Thirdly, why does Buckley use Trump's real name but not Pence's real name? I guess because using "Mike Pants" shows off his wit... Cause, you know, "Pants" is a funny word.

Fourthly, the whole subplot of Trump coercing beauty pageant contestants to have sex is just sick and not humorous.

Fifthly, though Trump can be a jerk, it doesn't take much research to find that he has treated many people with kindness and compassion. Just talk to Gold Star family members who speak quite well of the man.

Sixthly, poor prediction skills on the election.

The year of 2020, with the Covid debacle, the BLM riots, the Basement Campaign of FJB, was so much wilder than the satire that Buckley imagined. And more darkly funny. Can't blame him for not foreseeing that madness, but his nasty view of Trump and all around him led him to write a book that is sadly unfunny.

Who knows what Christopher Buckley's father would have thought of the presidency of Donald Trump or this book. But I think the man who saw merit in Ronald Reagan when the establishment dismissed him might well have been supportive of the former and future president.

The one thing that brought me pleasure in reading this book was thinking about how incredibly ineffective the satiric skills of Christopher Buckley (and the satire of other Never Trump Clowns) were in preventing Trump from winning a second election. The imagined sounds of Buckley's current grinding teeth were what I enjoyed most about the book.