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America’s newspaper of record—which is the Babylon Bee of course—is out with the headline, “Biden Campaign Says He Is So Close to a VP Pick He Can Smell Her.” The Bee really needs to stop scooping the New York Times. In any case, in this episode of the weekend happy hour Lucretia and I survey the box canyon Biden has got himself into by pledging to pick a woman running mate who essentially has to be a woman of color. And we give our predictions of who it will be when (and if) Biden clears his head.
Then we move on to the wider issues behind Trump’s tweet about possibly postponing the election. We get into some details about voting, mail-in and provisional ballots, ballot counting, precinct management, and other aspects of the matter that have drawn surprisingly little attention from the non-stop media panic about the election, and believe me, you’ll be wanting a double-shot of whisky after you hear us.
Finally, a lightning round of shots, along with some spiffy grilled hamburger recipes to go with your weekend (or weekday) whisky. Nearby is a before and after pic of Lucretia’s bacon-wrapped stuffed burger recipe in action. Remember—always drink your whisky neat, and don’t forget to milk the soft power dividend! (I forgot these reminders at the end of this episode, but at least I didn’t drunkenly mangle it like last week.)
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I think Susan Rice is a no go (especially in the Biden situation) because she’s never been elected to anything. And she has the whole Libyan thing (with plenty of film). I think it might be Tammie Duckworth with the idea that she’s basically uncritisiable but I have a feeling that Biden – or Dr. Jill – might not like her plus brings up Biden’s part in the wars.
I mentioned this burger to my cardiologist and he slapped me! Hard!
Slap him back! With a medium rare cheeseburger!