Tag: Marriage

More year-end awards today!  Jim and Greg embark on the second half of their six-episode saga known as the 2022 Three Martini Lunch Awards. Today, they offer up their selections for the best political idea, worst political idea, and boldest political tactics for the year. Their selections range from the campaign trail to the halls of Congress to the biggest land war in Europe in more than 75 years.

Betrayed Again


Just when I started to believe that the Republicans in Congress might actually be ready to act boldly, they have betrayed us again. It’s difficult for me to determine whether I am angrier with the Democrats for proposing this deceitful bill, the Respect for Marriage Act, or with the Republicans for lining up behind them. This Act further damages and weakens our religious liberties, in particular our support of traditional marriage, and it reminds us that the Progressive Left will never stop infringing on our rights and freedoms.

So what’s the big deal? A dozen Republicans have decided that they want to cozy up to the Democrats, or are too lazy or foolish to study the real intentions of the bill, or simply don’t care:

Quote of the Day: Love, Fidelity, and Perseverance


“Strong marriages—marriages in which a man and a woman stay together for their entire lives—are good for society as well as for the couple themselves. They serve as examples to the community of the virtues of love, fidelity, and perseverance. They demonstrate the capacity of the human being to live up to his or her promises.” — Made for a Reason Retreat Day Six—Marriage: Made for the Common Good

I see Susan Quinn has beat me to the topic of marriage today, and that we share a wedding anniversary. My husband and I have been married 32 years today, slightly more than half my life. I’ll go ahead and publish this post and make this wedding reflection day on Ricochet.

Overturning Roe and Obergefell Leads to … Cousin Marriage?


In a comment elsewhere, I was pondering the meaning of the overturning of Roe v. Wade.  While liberals are having a tizzy about Justice Clarence Thomas’ comments about gay marriage and contraception, I think they might be looking at it the wrong way.

Obergefell requires all states and territories to recognize same-sex marriages from any and all states, to uphold them, and to provide for them as a function of due process and equal protection.  Same-sex marriage cannot be banned.

Marriage Is Not Meant to Be Fun


You can’t imagine my exasperation a couple of days ago when I read about the marital bliss of many couples that comes from their living apart.

Seriously? Is that supposed to be an honest-to-goodness marriage?

Let me clarify that the people I’m describing in this post are not apart temporarily due to job changes or other life disruptions; these are people who think their lives are dramatically better because they aren’t living with their spouses.

On this episode of “The Federalist Radio Hour,” author and relationship coach Suzanne Venker joins Federalist Executive Editor Joy Pullmann to discuss her new book “How to Get Hitched (and Stay Hitched): A 12-Step Program for Marriage-Minded Women” and how to navigate marriage in a world with historic levels of singleness.

Marriage and Roles


When I played football, I wanted to be a running back. I wanted to be the bull that charges over and through opposition, pitting my strength against theirs.

Instead, the coach assigned me to tight end. My role was the less glorious — but no less important — job of blocking. At least in hindsight, I trust that the coach’s choice for me was the right one. But the dream of playing running back stayed with me.

A Marriage Declaration


I got married a few weeks ago and I thought I’d share the declaration that my wife and I gave in front of family and friends. We took inspiration from numerous sources, and I’m not ashamed to admit the closing line was lifted from one of the most important documents in human history.

We collaborated on this declaration and we hope this inspires you if you’re writing vows of your own or if you know anyone who’s getting married.

Together, we declare:

Seeing Time Differently


I realized early on that my beloved and I approach time very differently. Case in point: our recent trip. We were going to head out on a real vacation for the first time in over a year. Besides driving to our first stop, we had a couple of errands to run on our way out of town, and the wife announced that we’d be ok if we left at ten minutes to nine on that Friday.

OK, good – I have my mission. Ten minutes to nine. I am 100% committed to that departure time. For the preceding 24 hours, everything I do will be geared toward making sure that at ten minutes to nine we are in the car and headed down the driveway. When we do that, some small part of the universe will be in perfect order.

Member Post


As someone whose marriage has gone over the edge, metaphorically speaking, and crawled its way back up, I believe I have some helps to offer for those in a similar struggle. By “over the edge,” I mean that we were separated for a year and a half as we painstakingly worked our way upward and […]

Join Ricochet!

This is a members-only post on Ricochet's Member Feed. Want to read it? Join Ricochet’s community of conservatives and be part of the conversation. Join Ricochet for Free.

Member Post


Christians and Jews should not think in the same manner as agnostics. There will always be much to explore and to discover. But some answers have been given to us. Sacred scripture and apostolic tradition bear witness to received truths, general or particular, from which research and reason can proceed in confidence.  Hadley Arkes explains […]

Join Ricochet!

This is a members-only post on Ricochet's Member Feed. Want to read it? Join Ricochet’s community of conservatives and be part of the conversation. Join Ricochet for Free.

The First Rule of Romance


Romance is the lover at play.

An acquaintance of mine told me how he had asked his live-in partner to marry him. He and his partner had lived together for several years. He had been married before and had grown children. The kitchen faucet started acting up, so she got under the sink and began working on it. He was watching her work and was moved by how much he loved this remarkable person.

Ayaan speaks with Dan Seligson about polygamy and the marriage market. They explore the question: does polygamy breed poverty or does poverty breed polygamy? Dan also explains where polygamy still exists, the chronic scarcity it creates, and the commodification of women.

Dan received his PhD in physics from Berkeley. From 1984 until 2001, he worked at Intel Corp. in Santa Clara and Jerusalem where he focused on manufacturing technology and machine learning. He has been an investor in, advisor to, and board member and founder of several genomics-related companies. He has been awarded 9 US patents.

The Four Marriage Questions


For the young ones… and the mature, as needs be…

Many people marry for the wrong reasons and end up single, often with obligations, and holding a cynical view of love and relationships. But a short, simple test can help guide you toward what a successful marriage may look like.

Group Writing: Connecting the Years


My parents first met in Worcester, MA, after my father returned from World War II. He was a translator in the Army; he’d learned French in high school so “translator” must have seemed like a logical assignment. His first name was Carlton, but everyone called him Tex, after a baseball player named Tex Carlton. As a teenager, he was a skinny kid and his friends called him “Tweet.”

Mom was pretty much a loner named Shirley, but she and my dad made a connection after the war. When they decided to be married, they had a large wedding with lots of family and friends. But when the photographer went to develop the photographs, they were somehow lost or destroyed.* The only testament to their wedding was a movie that was taken on 16mm film. Years later, when my uncle who had the only copy offered to share it with them, they learned that the projector needed to play the film wasn’t readily available. So, the film sat in a drawer.

Finally, a friend was able to convert the film for them so that it could be played! (I have no information about the technical details; I only know that we were going to see a wedding film of my parents’ special occasion—finally!)

A Cabbage Patch Guy in a World of Barbie and Kens


I was misled.

I grew up in the era of “Ozzie and Harriett” and “Leave It to Beaver.” In my formative years, I was taught that men grew up to be fathers and women grew up to be wives. Marriage was for life, except for that odd situation where a man abused a woman, or either party cheated. Sex was only proper when you loved someone. Somewhere in between first grade and high school, however, that changed. We had the Summer of Love starting in 1967, and the Vietnam War, and the integration of the public schools. Any one of those things would have been a social phenomenon, but all of them together at the same time truly upset the apple cart.

If I sound like a cranky get-your-kids-off-my-lawn old man, that’s not my intent. Integration was long overdue, and purchased in blood and toil. Women had been fighting for equal rights for decades and were not to be limited to one career choice as breeding stock. Allan Sherman explained in his book The Rape of the APE (American Puritan Ethic) that men and women had been having sex and not following the church rules for about 200 years. In fact, the myths that were sold by Ozzie Nelson and June Cleaver were already on their way out. Change is often painful, but stasis is more so. The Vietnam War put generations in conflict with each other, and it took until September 11, 2001, for that rift to finally heal with a united country. It’s taken less than 19 years for the rift to reappear.

Five Old-Fashioned Values We Rightly Reject


After a steady diet of period films, literature, and historical nonfiction, I’ve realized that in some ways, our culture has changed dramatically in the last 250 years or so. If you or I were transported to say, 1820, and we mingled with Americans then, we would struggle to fit in. We often grouse about the loss of shared values over time, and it is true that some of the beliefs that strengthened family units and held our culture together have been eroded. However, a few of those entrenched traditional attitudes were harmful and encumbered our progress. Some of them were held in opposition to the self-evident truths proclaimed in our founding documents, or worked against the family unit, and I say good riddance. Here are some examples:

Marrying Advantageously: One is probably wise to consider a prospective mate’s financial situation (especially to the degree that they reflect work ethic). However, novelists such as Jane Austen, who were contemporaneous to rank-and riches-conscious cultures, detail for us a milieu of shameless social climbing and gold-digging. Behaviors that would today be considered tacky seemed to be somewhat acceptable then, even expected: discussing openly how many pounds a year one was given as an allowance, or whether there was an inheritance to be had. One’s spouse needed to be of the right social class, and (as one biographer argued was true of George Washington’s marriage) even calculated to move one up the social ladder. We might argue that today’s criteria for marriage, a sense of romantic connection, for example, are even flimsier than they were in the past. Even so, we ordinarily do recognize today that character, kindness, and work ethic come into play in choosing a good spouse and likelihood of a productive future together.