Tag: Imperfection

Accepting Our Imperfect Selves


This was my first draft reflecting on my own insecurity . . .and then transforms into another understanding.

I think I must be one of the most insecure people on the planet. On Ricochet, we have so many articulate, confident, knowledgeable, and intelligent members that I am frequently in awe of them. Seriously. And I wonder how I can measure up to their thoughtful sharing of their ideas when it’s my turn.

The Gift of Imperfection


The issue of transgenderism is one that has deeply disturbed me since I first heard of it. We are losing thousands of young people to this horrific ideology that is determined to convince, especially young people, that there is something wrong with them and their bodies. Even more tragic is the radical insistence that they should reject their bodies, essentially reject who they are, and become the opposite sex. A recent article in The Federalist presented a compassionate way to identify the source of these victims’ self-hatred and to help them in less radical and destructive ways.

But I would like to suggest that this self-hatred is prevalent in other areas of our society that needs to be addressed as well. In this post, I would like to summarize what people have identified as a more reasonable and compassionate approach to people who want to change their identity. Then I’ll explore how the issue is a reflection of a greater issue within the current culture.

One of the most startling factors that have been happening in great numbers is not just the number of people who make the decision to transition, but those who have decided to “de-transition.” The people who transition are often pre-teen or teenage girls who already probably suffer from identity issues. With the pressures that come from teachers, friends, and the onslaught of transgender groups and videos on the internet, young girls are barraged with the idea that the only solution to their misery is changing their identity. By the time they tell their parents what they will be doing, it is often too late; parents have either assumed that the actions that their children take to identify with the other sex are a passing phase, or in many cases, they don’t tell their parents, rather than consult them with their confusion.

Renovation: Clearing My Spindle, Cleaning My Bowl


Let’s be clear: I could write at length about renovation in one of its generally accepted senses. I could write about the house we’ve been building and renovating for over three decades, and which still has a couple of unpainted surfaces of the original drywall for the interested to view at will (don’t call me, I’ll call you). I could write about my almost-complete set of DeWalt 20v Li-Ion cordless tools. Or about my heavy-duty Bosch hammer drill. My three chain saws. My small cement mixer. And I could wax lyrical about all the uses I’ve put each of them, and their dozens of forbears, to since 1986, and what I plan to do with them this year.

But, right now, I’d rather talk about headspace. Mine. Here goes:

I gave up making New Year’s resolutions years ago. No more “this is the year I finally build that wet room I’ve wanted for decades,” or “I bet that over the course of the next twelve months, if I just set my mind to it, I can transform myself from ‘frumpy old grandma’ into to the mischievous and energetic gamine who still lives inside me somewhere,” or even, “perhaps I can resolve to keep the McDonalds and Starbucks detritus out of the car for the foreseeable future, so that the mice don’t invite themselves in quite so frequently for parties with the leftovers, leaving their own little presents in the cup holders and the glove compartment as they go.”

Perfection and Its Discontents


shutterstock_161407115Greeks promoted the notion of “perfection” – that there was such a thing as a perfect ratio, or a perfect body. And this word and concept has similarly entered our modern world: perfection has become the standard against whom everyone or everything is measured. Sadly, it is also part of our religious thinking as well: the concept that some people are “almost” perfect, for example.

The problem with the notion of perfection is that it is not only hard to achieve, but that it is, itself, a lie.

Take, for example, a simple physical object – a little cube. It might look like a perfect cube, but if you look closely enough, you will find that it is full of imperfections and impurities. The dimensions themselves can only be measured within certain tolerances, limited by instruments. There is nothing in this world that is “perfectly” any dimension at all, given that even a measurement is true only for a specific temperature and atmospheric pressure and composition of the ambient air… the list is endless.