“He that wrestles with us strengthens our nerves and sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our helper.” — Edmund Burke

We can look at Burke’s statement through the lens of our own lives. I’ve met all kinds of people who either hide from those who disagree with them, or look for people to fight with. In many ways, both attitudes can be unhelpful because their underlying goals are not productive.

A person who hides from disagreement is never in a position to analyze his own beliefs and values. He’s created a cave in which to hide, afraid that someone in the world may make him feel uncomfortable or damage his belief system. Some people are just averse to conflict, period. They value peace and calmness above all else. The biggest problem for these folks is that they never check out their assumptions because they are either too insecure or too self-absorbed to engage with people who disagree with them.