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I’ve been inspired by two of Denise’s recent posts (Choosing Life and Is Divorce Bad for Children?). The vulnerability she shared gave me courage to share more of my story. Also, Gary and I had a very pleasant exchange recently, in which he offered an apology for misunderstanding my motives. It’s not that I needed an apology, […]
We knew when the incoherent Supreme Court decision on gay marriage came down last year that judges would ignore the law and impose gender-neutral marriage on the nation, as is now happening in several states. Our country will reap the whirlwind. So, my friends of faith, how are we now going to live?
I’ve been thinking a lot about this. We’re going to be walking a tightrope, but we must stick to our beliefs and build communities that are as impervious as possible to the whirlwind of terrible things that are coming: polygamy, polyamory, children bought and sold, recruitment to homosexuality, pressure to ignore gender differences, a changed understanding of fidelity and so on. In other words, we will have to build a religious view of marriage that is entirely different than the secular view and the communities that revolve around it. A religious view of marriage has existed in the past, but it was not wholly different than the secular one. Now it will have to be. We are going to have to resist state efforts to crush even this. Our whole lives are going to have to change.
For all we fawn over celebrating mothers, or mother-figures on this holiday, we often forget that this day causes a fair amount of discomfort, or even pain for those parents and children whose relationships are rocky, or have failed altogether. Not all relationships transition well from childhood to adulthood, while other relationships falter later on. […]
American families have changed in the past 30 years. Parents are older and children are fewer. This combination of changes has led to a lot of parents who hover over their child’s every waking moment. They enroll their children in numerous lessons and activities, arrange play dates, help with homework, demand little by way of chores (but supervise what few chores they actually require), influence teachers and school administrators as much as possible on their child’s behalf, and continue this behavior into college. The charming designation “helicopter parents” has consequently entered the lexicon.
As the mother of five children, I often felt guilty that I didn’t give my children enough time. I sometimes thought that I should be playing with them or supervising them instead of doing some necessary task. Parental confession: I can count on one hand the number of times I helped with homework. They were on their own in choosing their friends, and in a whole lot of other ways.
I’m writing a paper about “third party reproduction.” If you’re not familiar, this is what they call it when a person or couple decide to make a baby but involve a third party in the process, either as a source of genetic material or as a host for purposes of gestation. Surrogacy and artificial insemination are two of the primary examples.
Third-party reproduction is going to become a big bioethical debate over the next few years. It’s not a new thing, but the pressures to make it easier and cheaper are intensifying rapidly. The reason is obvious. Same-sex couples are creating a market for children. The fertility industry is looking to meet that demand.
I’ve been working on an analogy and I’m curious how it strikes people. I’d be grateful if people would tell me what intuitions they have about it.