Tag: Ask Uncle Max

Contributor Post Created with Sketch. Ask Uncle Max: Schmuck, Putz, or Schlong?

 

Dear Uncle Max,

An old friend from New York was talking about a time I was cheated, and he said I got “schlonged.” Can you explain what that means? Also, why does Yiddish have so many different words for the same thing — schmuck, putz, schlong? How can I tell which one to use?

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Dear Uncle Max, Christmas is coming, which means a visit from our crazy, tone-deaf uncle (also named, coincidentally, Max). Now, my lapsed Lutheran family may no longer believe in the reason for the season, but they do believe in singing Christmas carols, and coming from sturdy Lutheran stock, most are pretty good at it. More

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Dear Uncle Max, A bisexual friend of mine just broke up with her girlfriend. Is there any tactful way to suggest to her that maybe she should try for a man next time? More

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Dear Uncle Max, I can’t understand it. I’m not weird or anything, but women just won’t go out with me. I’m nice and polite and respectful, a good listener, all the things women say they want. They’re happy to be my friends — just never anything more. Why? More

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Another week passes with no sign of Penelope. Fortunately, Uncle Max has agreed to answer another question. Dear Uncle Max, More

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Note: Since Penelope has not been seen in a while, Ricochet has accumulated a backlog of members’ questions. My Uncle Max has agreed to fill in for Penelope for the time being. Dear Uncle Max, More

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