Tag: Ads

Psst, Consumer, Wanna Buy Your AlieNation?

 

Like many Americans right of center, the ads I see online feature plenty of vaguely patriotic products. Some of the stuff’s campaign gear. Some of it’s randomly tacti-cool. (Already got a tactical pen? Have you tried our tactical toothbrush yet? Got the toothbrush already, have you? What about a tactical toothpick?) Perhaps because my browsing habits are eclectic, the ads “targeting” me are eclectic, too. According to my ads, I’m a Trump-voting, militantly pro-life charismatic sedevacantist Catholic wiccan secular humanist who’s also militantly pro-choice and pining for the deceased Ruth Bader Ginsberg. I’m deaf, too. Because of earwax. But at least I’m not alone in that: judging by consumer ad complaints, the main symptom of Covid-19 is massive earwax buildup.

People who say they know about these things say that Covid’s virtual earwax buildup is a symptom of declining click-throughs on online ads. The more time we spend online without clicking through on ads, the more “bottom feeder” ads we see. Maybe I am who I am to online marketers because I don’t click through. Therefore I must “want”, in no particular order, Osteen Cubes, <insert name of Biblical woman here> Anointings, conversational Medieval Latin kits, “homeopathic” essential-oil blends consecrated to Jesus or my choice of goddess. Little lapel pins featuring lab flasks bubbling vacuities like “Science is real!” or light-splitting prisms spelling out “I’m gay for science!” in rainbow writing.

Rapid-fire lapel pin advertising directed my way, whether from right or left, never hits its target, since even if I saw a pin I liked, I wouldn’t buy it. If I saw an ad for a lapel pin featuring the smexxxiest anthropomorphized doped garnet laser — adorned with real synthetic garnet chips reading “She blinded me with science!” — well, I’d chuckle. But I wouldn’t click.

Jim Geraghty of National Review and Greg Corombos of Radio America welcome news that military and police are starting to defy President Maduro and that more influential nations are recognizing Juan Guiado as the interim president. They also wade through Virginia Gov. Ralph Northam’s shifting explanations for the racist photo in in his medical school yearbook and Northam defying both parties by refusing to resign. And they give thumbs down to most of the Superbowl ads for being too serious and too obvious in their efforts to be woke, saving their biggest eye roll for the Washington Post.

Member Post

 

Today Ted Cruz’s campaign (his campaign, not a SuperPAC) released a new immigration ad on their Youtube channel whose production qualities and tenor testify to a man who is not only serious, but has the chops to compete with the ad men and women on the Left. This is always where the GOP falls short, […]

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Member Post

 

I listen to Rush Limbaugh on the local AM station, and I’m usually tuned in to Sirius/XM Satellite Radio when I’m in the car, and I’ve long noticed how different their ads are from the FM music stations.  The AM and satellite ads are often so awful that I have to turn the radio off […]

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