The Diner is open.

Went all the way to Mexico last week just to watch a man die.

We’re getting ready for a road trip and you know it’s not best to travel on an empty stomach. So sidle to the long counter and get something in you before we take off.

James will return in two weeks. See you then.

In which the SS Tighty Whitey becomes a wreck and strands Gilligan and company on an island with a lot of vines and bamboo. Meanwhile in the news…. one of these days, Alice… to the moon! (Or at least to The Diner.)

Singing roosters… musical pigs… and a trail of references.

Don’t believe me? Vas you dare, Sharlie?!? Eggs-actley!

It’s time for your weekly dose of delicious content, a tasty treat for your ears, packed with wholesomeness! Indulge in a hearty serving of Lileks! Pour yourself a serving of “The Diner” – it’s the most satisfying way to kickstart your day!

The Diner: Where A.I. meets three little words scribbled on a note pad.

It’s the stuff that dreams are made of.

Anybody got any bars? Anyone?

Snow in Minnesota is legendary. More legendary than you could possibly know…

Does anybody mind if I slip two bits into the jukebox? Man… that sounds… so familiar.

Is that a fresh pot sitting on the Bunn-O-Matic? Pour me a cup and hand me a pack of crackers.

And put away that screwdriver. You’ll void the warranty on this episode of The Diner.

An episode that rests quietly as a snowflake hitting your tongue… and as spicy as one-too-many dashes of hot sauce… and the stuff of bad childhood dreams… that’s The Diner.

Got a quarter for the juke box? Thanks. Pay you back when I get my change.

It’s cah-raaaazy, Daddy-O.

It’s a cold, blustery day. C’mon in and have a hot cup of something.

Pay no attention to the grumpy old poet in the corner booth. It’s just another day in The Diner.

C’mon in and park yer carcass. Have you seen this in the Times? Can you believe it? Almost wished we had been there to see that. I mean, that’s how you write a news story, right?

Place an order and join us for a cup of coffee. Or two.

Thanksgiving: what a great time to start a diet.

James Lileks’ The Ramble returns. No Politics, no punditry — just palaver.

You might not be watching the new Twin Peaks, or care that it ever existed. But it changed TV, and one of the reasons that made it so unique was the music. Let’s go beyond the theme and explore the compositions of Angelo Badalamenti.

What do you do in Reno? Yes, yes, besides that. But here’s the more pressing issue for modern times: what does Reno do with Reno?

What makes a city or a country sound familiar? When the music sounds like we think it’s supposed to sound like. But what if our preconceptions are wrong? (Hint: they’re probably not)

What does monophonic sound have to do with the moral turpitude of electric shavers? Let’s find out.

James Lileks’ The Ramble is brought to you by Harry’s Shave. For a great shave at an even greater price, go to Harrys.com and enter the coupon code RAMBLE