Before Having a Hospital Birth, Here’s What You Need to Know

“Baby friendly” sounds so nice, doesn’t it? Wrong. Bethany and Kelly lay out the facts about hospital birth you need to know—from sleep-deprived psychosis to breastfeeding zealots. Skip this episode if you don’t want to hear medical descriptions of c-sections, lactation, and vaginal birth.

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There are 11 comments.

  1. Guruforhire Member

    The best case scenario for the birth of my second, if it had been at home would have been permanent cognitive disability. Yeah hospitals are not the most pleasant place, but some times god likes to keep you humble. Even being in the hospital with immediate emergency care, it was touch and go.

    So all else being equal, I think I prefer my healthy and alive son versus, ya know, a dead one. But then, my wife and I aren’t invited to give our birth story to our Doula’s natural childbirth classes because all the things “that almost never happen” happened….

    Edit: I am not judging anybodies choices, I am not telling anybody what they should or should not do. Just sayin’ sometimes this game called life gets put into hard mode.

    • #1
    • June 28, 2019, at 12:15 PM PDT
    • 7 likes
  2. JVC1207 Member

    Wow this podcast is spot on with regard to what it’s like to give birth in “baby friendly hospitals” these days. I had twins via scheduled c-section 3 months ago…and due to my complicated scoliosis, they had to do it under general anesthesia (which meant that they were pumping morphine into me the entire day or so after the surgery, rather than the spinal block/epidural). This of course made me extremely tired and loopy the whole day, in addition to chasing the pain the whole day of my twins’ birth. But what were they doing literally 20 min after I got out of surgery? Of course, trying to get me to breastfeed and let me know how important it was to my babies’ health, etc. Then of course, I got absolutely no sleep the entire time (I couldn’t even get out of bed until the following day).

    I was so out of it, exhausted and hormonal that I just did what I was told, and it took my mother standing up to the nurses and insisting that since my (37 week) twins were screaming from being hungry (as my milk wasn’t in yet), and I was beyond exhausted, it was time to let her work on feeding them with formula. You could tell the nurse knew that was the right call, but was afraid to do it lest she deviate from official policy. Sadly, it was probably the worst 3 days of my life. I broke down into tears with the OB who was tasked with assessing me for discharge, begging him to let me go home so I could sleep. He gave me the same line: “well, you should get used to no sleep now, you are a mom…”. I recall being so angry at that but too tired to protest much.

    I was pretty much bad-mouthing my hospital to anyone who would listen until I talked to a nurse friend and realized that this is just the normal state of things now at most hospitals…

    • #2
    • June 28, 2019, at 1:38 PM PDT
    • 5 likes
  3. TracyPoling Coolidge

    Love all your podcasts…but this one is so relatable! I too had 4 babies in 5 years (all boys 😳) and had 4 completely different birth stories. My last was an emergency c-section 5 weeks early. After all the drama, we realized baby 4 was completely fine, just small enough to stay in the nicu for 10 days. I went home without him which ended up being a blessing. I got so much sleep that I was completely ready for a premie baby when he came home 10 days later. Im sorry for all the guilt out there! My last was born 17 years ago and the nurses were all helpful and supportive. I didn’t get to breastfeed him as I did my others due to various reasons, but he is just as healthy as my other kids!

    • #3
    • June 28, 2019, at 1:43 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  4. Kozak Member

    Guruforhire (View Comment):

    The best case scenario for the birth of my second, if it had been at home would have been permanent cognitive disability. Yeah hospitals are not the most pleasant place, but some times god likes to keep you humble. Even being in the hospital with immediate emergency care, it was touch and go.

    So all else being equal, I think I prefer my healthy and alive son versus, ya know, a dead one. But then, my wife and I aren’t invited to give our birth story to our Doula’s natural childbirth classes because all the things “that almost never happen” happened….

    Edit: I am not judging anybodies choices, I am not telling anybody what they should or should not do. Just sayin’ sometimes this game called life gets put into hard mode.

    Home delivery is for newspapers.

    99% of the time everything in a delivery is fine. 1 % of the time it’s terror and chaos. I’ve been there when the mom had to be rushed into the OR for an emergency C section. More than once. Or when the child needs to be resuscitated at birth.

    When seconds count the hospital is minutes away for a home birth.

    • #4
    • June 28, 2019, at 4:03 PM PDT
    • 5 likes
  5. MarciN Member

    Kozak (View Comment):

    Guruforhire (View Comment):

    The best case scenario for the birth of my second, if it had been at home would have been permanent cognitive disability. Yeah hospitals are not the most pleasant place, but some times god likes to keep you humble. Even being in the hospital with immediate emergency care, it was touch and go.

    So all else being equal, I think I prefer my healthy and alive son versus, ya know, a dead one. But then, my wife and I aren’t invited to give our birth story to our Doula’s natural childbirth classes because all the things “that almost never happen” happened….

    Edit: I am not judging anybodies choices, I am not telling anybody what they should or should not do. Just sayin’ sometimes this game called life gets put into hard mode.

    Home delivery is for newspapers.

    99% of the time everything in a delivery is fine. 1 % of the time it’s terror and chaos. I’ve been there when the mom had to be rushed into the OR for an emergency C section. More than once. Or when the child needs to be resuscitated at birth.

    When seconds count the hospital is minutes away for a home birth.

    I could not agree more.

    I strongly believe that women should find a hospital and doctor they trust and go that route.

    • #5
    • June 28, 2019, at 4:17 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  6. GrannyDude Member

    Like Guru, I have a birth story—my late, first grandson’s—that makes me much more inclined to put up with the various discomforts of a hospital because there’s an O.R. thirty seconds away. But there are certainly risks to being in a hospital—they’re germy, for one thing (I got a staph infection during my first son’s cesarean, for example). Home is nicer, and the germs are mostly yours.

    But losing a grandchild…yeah. 

    I used to be very doctrinaire about childbirth as well as about much else. Not so much anymore. 

    • #6
    • June 28, 2019, at 5:20 PM PDT
    • 4 likes
  7. Stad Thatcher

    I found it amazing a hospital could be new-mom unfriendly – calling child protective services just because you want to take your baby home within 24 hours?

    I find it ironic a hospital that would call CPS to take a newborn away from a new mother who just wants to take her baby home, would not touch the phone if they saw a pregnant woman entering the Planned Parenthood clinic across the street . . .

    • #7
    • June 29, 2019, at 6:32 AM PDT
    • 6 likes
  8. EB Thatcher
    EB

    My young cousin (we’ll call her Jane) had a very disappointing experience with the birth of her first child – she hadn’t educated herself so unrealistic expectations and ignorance of choices, OB nurses that didn’t listen to her, a young husband and parents who were too emotional to be good advocates, etc. When a friend was having her first baby, she asked Jane to be there with her. Beforehand, Jane talked with her at length about what she really wanted. During the childbirth, Jane was able to speak up and advocate for her friend.

    A nurse there told Jane, “You are really good at this. You should be a doula.” So she found out what a doula actually was, what were the requirements for certification, took the training, and became certified. She now has a doula practice and her objective is to work with the mother to educate her on the various options, aid her in deciding what option(s) she wants, and then during childbirth to assist the mother and be her advocate.

    • #8
    • June 29, 2019, at 7:55 AM PDT
    • 2 likes
  9. Stad Thatcher

    EB (View Comment):
    So she found out what a doula actually was, what were the requirements for certification, took the training, and became certified. She now has a doula practice and her objective is to work with the mother to educate her on the various options, aid her in deciding what option(s) she wants, and then during childbirth to assist the mother and be her advocate.

    Ain’t it amazing when people discover what their God-given talent is, then have the gumption to act on it?

    A big “Woohoo!” for Jane!

    • #9
    • June 29, 2019, at 2:10 PM PDT
    • 1 like
  10. I Shot The Serif Member

    You know, I’ve been significantly more nervous about the Hospital Experience than about labor itself, and this didn’t help. Lots of interesting stuff here; thanks.

    • #10
    • June 29, 2019, at 11:12 PM PDT
    • Like
  11. danys Thatcher

    I chose to deliver my 2 babies, 12 years apart, at the same hospital where my mother delivered her 8 children. My expectations and desires were pretty low with both deliveries: healthy baby, healthy me and in that order. My expectations were realized plus we received excellent care from the nurses, respiratory therapist, and my ob-gyn. I’m particularly grateful for the respiratory therapist.

    • #11
    • June 30, 2019, at 12:30 PM PDT
    • 3 likes