Chinese Dad Hires an Assasin

 

….to kill his son’s on-line character. Apparently, that was the only way to get the kid to join the real world. From The Next Web:

What would you do if your adult son was playing video games all day instead of looking for work? Well, one Chinese father resorted to desperate measures when he reportedly hired in-game hitmen to attack his son whenever he logged on to his favorite game, according to the People’s Daily.

After being killed repeatedly in an online game, 23-year-old Xiao Feng figured out that the high-level griefers had been put up to the task by his dad, who says he hoped the trick would cause his son to lose interest in the game. Xiao Feng maintains that he’s not going to settle for just any job and that he hasn’t found the right fit yet.

Two immediate responses: 1) It’s rather brilliant of the father, and suggests that the time has arrived when both parent and child are on-line game enthusiasts. And 2) It’s enormously comforting to hear that in China, young people are just as feckless and entitled as they are here. He hasn’t “found the right fit yet?” Doesn’t sound very Confucian to me. Sounds, in fact, like the Chinese-American trade balance is tipping in our favor: they send us iPhones, we send them the feel-good vocabulary of indolence.

We might win this trade war after all.

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Members have made 29 comments.

  1. Profile photo of NancyB Member

    Under China’s one child policy the one child tends to be a little spoiled, perhaps?

    • #1
    • January 7, 2013 at 1:07 am
  2. Profile photo of Stephen Hall Member
    NancyB: Under China’s one child policy the one child tends to be a little spoiled, perhaps? · 4 minutes ago

    Many of the one-child progeny are called “little emperors” because they are so spoiled. Not to be confused with the “princelings”, who are the super-rich offspring of Mao Zedong’s political cronies.

    • #2
    • January 7, 2013 at 1:15 am
  3. Profile photo of Skyler Member

    The son should get a job as an on line hit man.

    • #3
    • January 7, 2013 at 4:42 am
  4. Profile photo of Keith Preston Member

    Glad to hear dad found the kill switch.

    As Joe Biden would say, “literally.”

    • #4
    • January 7, 2013 at 4:54 am
  5. Profile photo of Dave Carter Contributor

    So if we give President Obama a virtual country to destroy, might he leave our real one alone? I know, I know, …but a guy can dream, can’t he?

    • #5
    • January 7, 2013 at 5:00 am
  6. Profile photo of EJHill Member

    23? No online hit man for me. One day the kid wakes up and all of his stuff is in selfstorage. Then he gets handed an envelope with $100 and a key to an apartment with one month’s rent prepaid.

    “Son, you have four weeks to get your act together.”

    • #6
    • January 7, 2013 at 5:25 am
  7. Profile photo of Matthew Gilley Member

    This really sounds like one of your great Kim Jong Un parodies.

    • #7
    • January 7, 2013 at 5:25 am
  8. Profile photo of Jimmy Carter Member
    Skyler: The son should get a job as an on line hit man. · 48 minutes ago

    This is a magnificent, clever comment.

    Well played.

    • #8
    • January 7, 2013 at 5:32 am
  9. Profile photo of Mudwallow Member

    There’s always Homer Simpson’s promise to his kids:

    “18 and you’re out the door!”

    • #9
    • January 7, 2013 at 5:46 am
  10. Profile photo of DocJay Member

    “Are you an assassin?”, “I’m a soldier”. “You’re neither. You’re an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill”.

    • #10
    • January 7, 2013 at 6:04 am
  11. Profile photo of EJHill Member

    And there’s this…

    Online.jpg

    • #11
    • January 7, 2013 at 6:19 am
  12. Profile photo of Nanda Panjandrum Inactive
    Nanda Panjandrum

    We may just win in the end as you say, Rob…

    • #12
    • January 7, 2013 at 6:19 am
  13. Profile photo of I. raptus Member

    If you’re not familiar with online games, this is even more clever than it sounds. It isn’t just having someone kill him in-game (which rarely is much more than an inconvenience), but they’re actively “griefing” him whenever he plays, which makes the entire experience totally unpleasant. Good discouragement, and the son will hopefully learn a lesson when/if he realizes that his father was responsible. Also … it’s hilarious.

    • #13
    • January 7, 2013 at 6:41 am
  14. Profile photo of Brian Clendinen Member

    Yay but the Father was lucky that his son was playing a game were greifers could get away with it long term and it was PvP. Some games you can’t get away with that. However it is a brilliant idea short of kicking him out of the house.

    • #14
    • January 7, 2013 at 7:20 am
  15. Profile photo of Capt. Aubrey Member

    I hate to be a grumpy old man but…well actually I like it and this is one of the few places I still can be so… I get t he creativity and all but when my boys play too much Xbox or wii they have to stop. Period. One reason they have to live with discipline is so this sort of thing doesn’t happen when they get older. If they whine and cry about int they get punished for that but they don’t probably because they know it doesn’t work. Just so you know I’m not a Luddite. I agree with Geo. Gilder in life after television and I’m sure kids gain some benefits from playing but they can also be a gigantic waste of time. I am happy the Cinese are also having the problem. We should make them all do judo like the Japanese…:)

    • #15
    • January 7, 2013 at 7:25 am
  16. Profile photo of Peter Gøthgen Member
    Xiao Feng maintains that he’s not going to settle for just any job and that he hasn’t found the right fit yet.

    This, to me, is the most insanely aggravating part. It reminds me of an incident a while back in which Hannity debated an occupier who claimed that there was no work anywhere. The next day, Hannity’s staff called the guy to offer him a job, which he rejected because he wanted more money.

    I’m sorry, buttercup, does this section of Ponyland have the wrong flavor of free ice cream?

    Try this on for size: take the job you can get until you find the job you want. It’s called being an adult, you whiny little glob of self-entitled flotsam. You do not deserve to be celebrated because you have a pulse. If you want to be successful you need to make yourself valuable to others – not a drain on their resources.

    • #16
    • January 7, 2013 at 7:47 am
  17. Profile photo of TheRoyalFamily Member
    EJHill: 23? No online hit man for me. One day the kid wakes up and all of his stuff is in selfstorage. Then he gets handed an envelope with $100 and a key to an apartment with one month’s rent prepaid.

    “Son, you have four weeks to get your act together.”

    When your one kid is both your retirement plan and your future caregiver, this might not be the best idea. It might work, but it might blow up in your [old] face.

    • #17
    • January 7, 2013 at 8:12 am
  18. Profile photo of outstripp Inactive

    Proper gun control will put an end to stories like this.

    • #18
    • January 7, 2013 at 8:37 am
  19. Profile photo of Stephen Hall Member

    Maybe the ‘kid’ should help establish an Occupy Tiananmen Square movement. Oh, wait ….

    • #19
    • January 7, 2013 at 8:56 am
  20. Profile photo of HerrForce1 Member

    It’s a good thing the son is 23. If some clever parent of a middle schooler tried that here the administration would summon police for a misplaced cyber bullying charge…and win. Thanks for pointing this out Rob.

    • #20
    • January 7, 2013 at 9:21 am
  21. Profile photo of Mr. Bildo Inactive

    I just block my kid’s devices’ MAC id on the router. Problem solved. Turn off the Internet and they’re left with bricks.

    Network access is privilege in my house and I’m a [C0C] tyrant. 

    • #21
    • January 7, 2013 at 9:45 am
  22. Profile photo of Valiuth Member
    Rob Long: 

    … they send us iPhones, we send them the feel-good vocabulary of indolence.

    We might win this trade war after all. · · 5 hours ago

    “They will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.” 

    Our culture of decadence, laziness, and comfort is a powerful thing. Why do you think Al Queda hates us? Cause we bomb their families? No! It is because we can lure their children to forsake all their old traditions and morals. It is what we do best. We don’t just defeat our enemies we change them. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of their lives.

    Buwahahahaahaha!!!!

    They will soon all be like us. 

    • #22
    • January 7, 2013 at 10:06 am
  23. Profile photo of SWBart Member

    It’s too late for this young fool, but I agree with many here that early discipline and parental interference is the key. My kids would be kicked out of the house to be out doors to play. Technology is great, but we generally do a lousy job of controlling ourselves around it. When my kids complained about the house rules, I would remind them that until they are 18 they lived in a benign dictatorship. If they continued to complain they got to clean up after the dog in the back yard, one of my most effective parenting inspirations: “pick up poop for a poopy attitude”. I think they both did it once and just the threat worked wonders. They are now 24 and 20 and have their heads on fairly straight so far. We got lucky with good kids, but parents do need to put some effort in to increase the chances.

    • #23
    • January 8, 2013 at 1:53 am
  24. Profile photo of Nathan Harden Contributor

    Great story

    • #24
    • January 8, 2013 at 3:30 am
  25. Profile photo of Annegeles Reagan

    An only child is only spoiled if the parents spoil him/her. Children with siblings can be spoiled brats. As the parent of an “only,” I can proudly say that mine is generous, caring, hard working, responsible, and a lot of fun! I “spoiled” her with love, not with things.

    As for the post – I love that the Dad knew how to play the game as well as, or better than, his son.

    Stephen Hall
    NancyB: Under China’s one child policy the one child tends to be a little spoiled, perhaps? · 4 minutes ago

    Many of the one-child progeny are called “little emperors” because they are so spoiled. Not to be confused with the “princelings”, who are the super-rich offspring of Mao Zedong’s political cronies. · 14 hours ago

    Edited 14 hours ago

    • #25
    • January 8, 2013 at 4:02 am
  26. Profile photo of Joan of Ark La Tex Member

    A nation that sees human life as nothing more than state property to be disposed at whims cannot hope to inherit true leadership in this world. God’s justice will be done. Good will triumph evil. All the underground churches are fully packed in China. They cannot kill everyone. 

    • #26
    • January 9, 2013 at 8:02 am
  27. Profile photo of Nanda Panjandrum Inactive
    Nanda Panjandrum

    ^ Wisdom, Joan!

    • #27
    • January 9, 2013 at 8:34 am
  28. Profile photo of Joan of Ark La Tex Member
    Nanda Panjandrum: ^ Wisdom, Joan! · 37 minutes ago

    Thanks Nanda, it’s maddening to see how much evil is being done by the hopelessly corrupt CCP. To think that Obama voted for the bill that would support this kind of outcome. 

    • #28
    • January 9, 2013 at 9:29 am
  29. Profile photo of Stephen Hall Member

    In terms of its size, goals, methods, and political and miltary power, the CCP is indeed the single most significant organized wickedness in the world today.

    • #29
    • January 9, 2013 at 9:43 am