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Yes, yes, I know the natural tendency upon hearing that the high-spirited president of Iran has denounced Paul the Octopus as an agent of Western propaganda is to mock. And to bring up that unfortunate business with the spy squirrels. Well, not me, folks. No mockery here. I, for one, congratulate him. It’s high time someone took a stand against that octopus.
I knew from the moment I saw that slimy thing what he was after. Mark my words, those tentacles will spread from the Red Sea to the Euphrates unless he’s stopped. Mollusks are exceedingly cunning, and their avarice is exceeded only by their ruthlessness.
Of course it’s no accident that Paul predicted the victors in the World Cup. He was tipped off. And you know by whom.
It is deplorable that the world’s so-called “leaders” have thus far been too cowardly to confront the powerful cephalopod lobby. Thank you, President Ahmadinajad, for your bravery.