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December 3, 2006: Since I’d been in Montana for several months, I felt qualified to make this list. I shared this on Ricochet years ago, but it makes sense as part of our story about moving to Montana. (Read Part I here, Part II here, Part III here, Part IV here, Part V here, Part VI here, Part VII here, Part VIII here, Part IX here, Part X here, Part XI here, and Part XII here.)
The lady in front of you at the checkout lane in Target creates only a small stir when she pays with Canadian currency.
The filth on your car obscures the rear license plate, but during the winter, it isn’t that much dirtier than the other cars in the parking lot.
When you drive around town with a visible California license plate, you feel negative “vibes” from other drivers.
The contractors working on your siding give you and your kids rides in their lift.
Some radio and TV stations give you traffic and weather applicable only to the residents of Spokane, Washington. Thanks.
There’s a drive-through cigarette store in town.
People with whom you do business are hard to track down during hunting season.
Parents bring their Kindergartners to a birthday party, and then leave.
The contractor working on your garage is warming himself at a roaring bonfire about ten feet from the construction site.
One of the items on a worksheet your Kindergartner brought home–that she correctly identified as starting with ‘g’–was a gun.
Roughly an eighth of the traffic in town is made up of horse trailers.
You hear shots ring out near your house and don’t comment much beyond “that must’ve brought down a buck.”
On your route to town, you pass “Cowboy Church,” which meets every Sunday at “5:59 pm.”
Christian radio stations dominate the airwaves.
You meet a neighbor for the first time and you are just as genial after you notice that his hands are covered with blood and dirt. (He’s wearing an orange vest, after all.)
You can find close, convenient parking spots in the Target parking lot on Sunday mornings.
You hear that Midwestern twang coming from about every fifth person you meet.
Your husband is startled by a deer standing in his garage.Published in