Ricochet Movie Fight Club: Question 18

 

Last week Brian Watt came out of his corner raging for a Page One knockout. Philo’s Page Three uppercut sent him reeling and Brian ended up clinging to the ropes, eying the clock but still upright when the final bell sounded. His jaw may be a little sore today, but not too sore to ask: What is the worst movie (not a made-for-TV movie) ever made?

From Brian:

It should be a movie shown in a movie theater produced or distributed by a major studio (MGM, Universal, United Artists, 20th Century Fox, Columbia, RKO, Warner Brothers, Disney, etc.); a movie that others may have raved about which prompted you to see it; that was so bad, you may have walked out or griped about it and felt cheated for wasting your money on it; so bad that you may have even heckled it or made catcalls at the screen in the theater while watching it; and so bad that you may actually think less of others’ taste in movies – whether critics, celebrities, or friends — who actually hold this awful film in high regard.

Of course, the more comprehensive your answer on why the movie is so awful, the more persuasive your answer will be.

The Rules:

  • Post your answer as a comment. Make it clear that this is your official answer, one per member.
  • Defend your answer in the comments and fight it out with other Ricochet member answers for the rest of the week.
  • Whoever gets the most likes on their official answer comment (and only that comment) by Friday night wins the fight.
  • The winner gets the honor of posting the next question on Saturday.
  • In the case of a tie, the member who posted the question will decide the winner.

Notes:

  • Only movies will qualify (no TV shows) however films that air on television (BBC films, a stand-alone mini-series) will qualify.
  • Your answer can be as off-the-wall or controversial as you’d like. It will be up to you to defend it and win people to your side.
  • Fight it out.

Special thanks to Arahant for compiling a list of previous questions.

Movie Fight Club Questions by Week:

  1. What is the best film portrayal of a book character? Winner: Charlotte with 18 likes for Alan Rickman’s portrayal of Professor Severus Snape in the Harry Potter movies.
  2. What is the best motion picture comedy of the 21st century? Winner: split decision. In an exemplary display of genuine sportsmanship, Randy Webster conceded the fight to Marjorie Reynolds’ pick Team America: World Police.
  3. What film provides the most evocative use of location? Winner: Taras with 21 likes for Lawrence of Arabia. Wasn’t even close.
  4. What is the best film that utilizes or is inspired by a work of William Shakespeare? Winner: Dr. Bastiat with five likes for The Lion King, a film inspired by Hamlet
  5. Which movie has the best surprise ending, or unexpected plot twist? Winner: Repmodad with 18 likes for The Sixth Sense
  6. What pre-1970s black-and-white movie would be most enjoyed by a modern 18-to 25-year-old audience? Winner: E J Hill with 9 likes for a Casablanca. (He didn’t exactly designate it his official answer, and most of the likes may have been for the modern Casablanca trailer rather than for it as an answer to the question, but nobody seemed to dispute it on those grounds, so that’s how the cookie crumbles.)
  7. What movie did you go to based on the trailer, only to have felt cheated? (i.e., the trailer was 10x better than the movie?) Winner: Back to back wins by E J Hill with 9 likes for Something to Talk About.
  8. Name the worst movie portrayal of your profession (where applicable.) Winner: LC with 8 likes for Denise Richards’ Dr. Christmas Jones in The World is Not Enough.
  9. What is the worst movie that claims to be based or inspired by a true story? Winner: Tex929rr with 16 likes for the, “…terrible acting, and countless deviations from history,” in Pearl Harbor.
  10. What is your favorite little known movie? Winner: A last-minute rally for Tremors made the difference as Songwriter took the week 10 win! 
  11. What is the best movie that you never want to watch again? Winner: Hitler Charlotte with 15 likes for Schindler’s List. Sorry, Richard Oshea but Jesus won the real fight. 

    Week 11.5 Exhibition Match (as a make-up of sorts, since Songwriter didn’t get the week 11 question submitted in time)
    Name the best movie theme song ever? No winner declared but I’m pretty sure it was I.M. Fine with “Moon River.”
  12. Name the best animated feature-length movie of all time. Winner: I.M. Fine with 10 likes for Pinocchio, and justice for I.M. Fine prevailed.
  13. What is the worst acting performance in an otherwise good film? Winner: In one of the most brutal fights we’ve seen yet Repmodad fended off a furious 12th-round onslaught by Gary McVey to give Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves the win with 20 likes.
  14. What is the quintessential American movie? Winner: Miffed White Male pulled off the comeback with 20 likes for The Right Stuff.  There was a two-way tie at 19 for second place as well. 
  15. What’s the most entertaining movie set during WWII? Winner: Arahant clearly won with Casablanca’s walloping 30 likes despite the withering onslaught by Sisyphus on the final day.
  16. What is the best movie love story? Winner: Songwriter with 20 likes for The Princess Bride with 20 likes. Up managed to make a strong showing and Dr. Bastiat is still conducting recounts trying to “find” some uncounted votes. 
  17. What’s the best’ buddy’ movie? Winner: Brian Watt wins with 12 likes for The Man Who Would be King.

 

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  1. Matt Bartle Member
    Matt Bartle
    @MattBartle

    And speaking of Ralph Fiennes, one could make an argument for one of his other movies, directed by that celebrated international auteur, Peter Greenaway: The Baby of Mâcon. Greenaway’s pictures are certainly different, but always weird and The Baby of Mâcon is just barely watchable. At the end of you just want to say, “Well, ok, I’ve seen that. If nothing else, I can say I’ve seen it.”

    • #91
  2. Western Chauvinist Member
    Western Chauvinist
    @WesternChauvinist

    Matt Bartle (View Comment):

    And speaking of Ralph Fiennes, one could make an argument for one of his other movies, directed by that celebrated international auteur, Peter Greenaway: The Baby of Mâcon. Greenaway’s pictures are certainly different, but always weird and The Baby of Mâcon is just barely watchable. At the end of you just want to say, “Well, ok, I’ve seen that. If nothing else, I can say I’ve seen it.”

    Or, “that was two hours of my life I’ll never get back?”

    • #92
  3. Bigfoot - Human Impersonator Coolidge
    Bigfoot - Human Impersonator
    @Bigfoot

    RushBabe49 (View Comment):

    It’s a “B” movie, so probably doesn’t count, but it is a real movie.

    Amazon Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death

    My first husband brought it home, and it was just awful, but so bad as to be hilarious.

    That is a great movie even if it does star Bill Maher. Shannon Tweed and Karen Mistal (now Waldren)  saved the movie. True art!!!

    Of course Karen Mistal reached the pinnacle of achievement as Tara in the Return of the Killer Tomatoes!!

    • #93
  4. Bigfoot - Human Impersonator Coolidge
    Bigfoot - Human Impersonator
    @Bigfoot

    Plan 9 From Outer Space is the winner. Most Ed Wood films are worth 4 to 6 viewings to get all of the nuance but Plan 9 was all done after 2.

     

    Official answer

    • #94
  5. Matt Bartle Member
    Matt Bartle
    @MattBartle

    Bigfoot – Human Impersonator (View Comment):

    Plan 9 From Outer Space is the winner. Most Ed Wood films are worth 4 to 6 viewings to get all of the nuance but Plan 9 was all done after 2.

    It’s a classic:

     

    • #95
  6. Sisyphus Member
    Sisyphus
    @Sisyphus

    Exodus: Gods and Kings, here’s a clip where El Shaddai is portrayed by a small boy mouthing dialogue that is inappropriate but, among other flaws, assumes that God has to ask what Moses is thinking.

    The whole movie plays God as a child having a temper tantrum.

    Lord have mercy.

    • #96
  7. Vince Guerra Member
    Vince Guerra
    @VinceGuerra

    B. W. Wooster (View Comment):

    Peter Jackson’s The Hobbit. He took a simple adventure story that was beloved to millions and gave us an overblown, ridiculous revisioning that may have ruined the book for an entire generation. Official answer.

    Bravo, sir. 

    • #97
  8. kylez Member
    kylez
    @kylez

    I’m glad about the list. I haven’t read through all the comments on the last three, and I somehow missed week number six.

    • #98
  9. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    Flicker (View Comment):

    Spaceballs

    Official Answer

    Good choice.  It, along with Caddyshack, definitely high up on the most over-rated list.

     

    • #99
  10. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    KirkianWanderer (View Comment):
    I love France, I speak French, it is one of my goals to live there full time at least for a bit one day…but the affection for Jerry Lewis makes me wonder about the sanity of that society. The French pride themselves on having such a sophisticated culture, one which celebrates all of the best parts of life (good sex, food, philosophy, etc), and then Jerry Lewis, who made a career out of acting like a mentally stunned orangoutang on speed, becomes their favorite foreign comedy icon. Pourquoi?

    I heard somewhere once that it was actually the guy who dubbed Lewis’s part in all his movies that made his movies so popular.

    • #100
  11. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    Addiction Is A Choice (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    I don’t have a nominee yet off the top of my head, but my wife says whatever it is, it will star Jennifer Aniston.

    Mr. & Mrs. Miffed, I beg to differ: Jennifer Anniston was great in Office Space; perfect for the role in The Good Girl; delightful in The Break Up; and look at those legs!

    I don’t recall what movie it was, but I once spent a 20-minute walk with my wife listening to her rant about a JA movie she’d watched the previous day.  Then a few months later another one.

     

    • #101
  12. Saint Augustine Member
    Saint Augustine
    @SaintAugustine

     - Dilbert by Scott Adams

    • #102
  13. kylez Member
    kylez
    @kylez

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Gosh. So many bad movies…

    I’ll say Showgirls.

    Movie about Vegas showgirls that was so badly written, acted, and directed that I wondered if anyone involved in production ever said, “You know, maybe we should just stop.”

    It made porn seem joyful and inspiring.

    Just indescribably horrible.

    I’v never seen it, but my understanding is that that’s one of those movies that is so bad it crosses over into good, if you approach it with the correct mindset.

    After some thought, I’m going to nominate the only movie I ever walked out of in the theater, the original Friday the Thirteenth, which started the trend of slasher films. I’d nominate the whole genre if I could, but I’ll at least go with the progenitor.

    Official answer.

    No. Showgirls is just bad.

    I never saw Friday the 13th. I saw the original Nightmare on Elm Street, and I thought it was actually a pretty clever movie. But in general, I can’t watch horror movies.

    I was surprised when I finally saw the original Nightmare that it should have been rated PG. Raiders of the Lost Ark is a more violent movie.

    • #103
  14. kylez Member
    kylez
    @kylez

    Ed G. (View Comment):

    New official answer: Taxi Driver

    I did not finish watching it. Nothing grabbed me, and much annoyed me. I didn’t care about any of the characters; I didn’t deliberate about just who or what what was crazy and who or what was normal. I wasn’t shocked by it. I hated the style and the acting. What was the point? Little to nothing as far as I could tell. No thanks.

    Very overrated movie. It’s anybody’s guess why “you talkin’ to me?” is such a famous line. So underwhelming. 

    • #104
  15. Dotorimuk Coolidge
    Dotorimuk
    @Dotorimuk

    Kevin Costner’s “The Postman,” a film which MUST’VE been sponsored by the USPS. (Post apocalyptic nonsense, where postmen are the heroes, because they deliver mail. Could be John Kasich’s favorite film. Someone should ask.)

    Mitigating factor: A cameo by Tom Petty.

     

    “Ride, postman, ride!”

    • #105
  16. Charlotte Member
    Charlotte
    @Charlotte

    Western Chauvinist (View Comment):

    Charlotte (View Comment):

    Western Chauvinist (View Comment):

    Now, I’m insisting, Stella is the worst.

    If you’re not cringing and hating life after that, I just don’t know what to say.

    But Taye Diggs is so pretty. Day-um.

    He’d be more attractive if he didn’t speak. Especially those lines. Ack.

    Totally fair point.

    • #106
  17. Charlotte Member
    Charlotte
    @Charlotte

    I’m so glad someone nominated English Patient. I wish I could vote for it 100 times.

    • #107
  18. Flicker Coolidge
    Flicker
    @Flicker

    Sisyphus (View Comment):

    Exodus: Gods and Kings, here’s a clip where El Shaddai is portrayed by a small boy mouthing dialogue that is inappropriate but, among other flaws, assumes that God has to ask what Moses is thinking.

    The whole movie plays God as a child having a temper tantrum.

    Lord have mercy.

    Chris “Baal” Bale said Moses clearly was psychotic and hallucinating and he played him that way.  But this doesn’t count as a movie.  It’s anti-christian propaganda.  The by the way, the public just wasn’t interested.

    • #108
  19. Lois Lane Coolidge
    Lois Lane
    @LoisLane

    The Lobster.

    The premise seems like a creative black comedy waiting to happen, but the only thing you’re left with is a pretentious piece of life sucking sadness that pretentious elites call “art.”  (An hour into this misery, you remember pretentious elites don’t actually have a sense of humor.)

    By the end, you’ll want to poke your eyes out. 

    • #109
  20. Lois Lane Coolidge
    Lois Lane
    @LoisLane

    Gossamer Cat (View Comment):

    Bishop Wash (View Comment):

    Phil Turmel (View Comment):

    The image in the OP reminded me that my son once made me watch….

    Official Answer: Zoolander

     

    I had successfully suppressed the memory, until just this post. That puts you on my [expletive] list, @vinceguerra.

    Is there a way to negative vote on here? While not a great movie, Zoolander is the opposite of a bad movie and by no means the worst. A fun movie that had the misfortune of being released shortly after 9/11 but gained a following on DVD.

    I loved Zoolander. Loved it!

    I hated this one, too, but I get it’s a cult classic.  I might even try it again to make sure it wasn’t just my mood in the theatre.  

    (You could not pay me to rewatch The Lobster.)

    • #110
  21. Lois Lane Coolidge
    Lois Lane
    @LoisLane

    B. W. Wooster (View Comment):

    Peter Jackson’s The Hobbit. He took a simple adventure story that was beloved to millions and gave us an overblown, ridiculous revisioning that may have ruined the book for an entire generation. Official answer.

    There are other films here that weren’t great, but if I could endorse someone else’s choice…. yeeeeessssss, my precious!!!!!   

    Jackson got needlessly, unforgivably greedy.  I’ve still never managed to get through all three of these.  And I moved to England in part because I just wanted to walk for a while where J R R Tolkien once breathed air.  

    Unlike ‘bad films’ this was actually a crime against story telling… a destruction of art… a sin on the silver screen.

    I felt truly bad for the actor cast as Bilbo.

    • #111
  22. Flicker Coolidge
    Flicker
    @Flicker

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Addiction Is A Choice (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    I don’t have a nominee yet off the top of my head, but my wife says whatever it is, it will star Jennifer Aniston.

    Mr. & Mrs. Miffed, I beg to differ: Jennifer Anniston was great in Office Space; perfect for the role in The Good Girl; delightful in The Break Up; and look at those legs!

    I don’t recall what movie it was, but I once spent a 20-minute walk with my wife listening to her rant about a JA movie she’d watched the previous day. Then a few months later another one.

    Jennifer Anniston was in the first wave of cyborg superstars, along with Ben Affleck and his buddy, the guy who sleep-walked his way through the Bourne Identity.  Nowadays it seems de rigueur that actors show no emotion, other than the characterization of three different and powerfully moving emotions: concern, serious concern w/ or w/out crying, and a mindless smile w/ or w/out laughter.  PS: Mark Zuckerberg is a cyborg as well.

    • #112
  23. cirby Inactive
    cirby
    @cirby

    Bigfoot – Human Impersonator (View Comment):

    RushBabe49 (View Comment):

    It’s a “B” movie, so probably doesn’t count, but it is a real movie.

    Amazon Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death

    My first husband brought it home, and it was just awful, but so bad as to be hilarious.

    That is a great movie even if it does star Bill Maher. Shannon Tweed and Karen Mistal (now Waldren) saved the movie. True art!!!

    Of course Karen Mistal reached the pinnacle of achievement as Tara in the Return of the Killer Tomatoes!!

    I hate to bring it up, but it’s Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death.

    • #113
  24. Brian Watt Inactive
    Brian Watt
    @BrianWatt

    cirby (View Comment):

    Bigfoot – Human Impersonator (View Comment):

    RushBabe49 (View Comment):

    It’s a “B” movie, so probably doesn’t count, but it is a real movie.

    Amazon Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death

    My first husband brought it home, and it was just awful, but so bad as to be hilarious.

    That is a great movie even if it does star Bill Maher. Shannon Tweed and Karen Mistal (now Waldren) saved the movie. True art!!!

    Of course Karen Mistal reached the pinnacle of achievement as Tara in the Return of the Killer Tomatoes!!

    I hate to bring it up, but it’s Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death.

    Directed by David Lean.

    • #114
  25. Barfly Member
    Barfly
    @Barfly

    I have encountered people who actually dig this kind of thing. Among that crowd, it’s generally accepted that Birdemic: Shock and Terror is the worst movie ever made.

    That is my official answer. Birdemic is so … I lack the word … that you’ll want to disqualify it. That’s not what we meant, you’ll say. I’ll understand.

    • #115
  26. cirby Inactive
    cirby
    @cirby

    Alien from L.A.

    That’s official.

    Terrible, terrible movie, starring Kathy Ireland right when she was one of the most famous swimsuit models in the world. So they take this absolutely gorgeous girl, put her in glasses, dress her in a bulky sweater, and have her speak in a very annoying childlike voice for the whole movie…

    Terrible writing, incredibly low production values, and the only real redeeming thing about the movie was how they used a handful of actors who played multiple characters each.

     

    • #116
  27. Barfly Member
    Barfly
    @Barfly

    Stad (View Comment):

    Vince Guerra: What is the worst movie (not a made-for-TV movie) ever made?

    My official answer is Snakes on a Plane.

    I love that movie. Consider this a downvote. 

    A friend and I were at work discussing it, before it came out. I’d heard of it, thought it was rumor, and he filled me in. Another guy was listening and asked what it was about. I laughed so hard I couldn’t explain it.

    • #117
  28. Barfly Member
    Barfly
    @Barfly

    ShellGamer (View Comment):

    Why has no one mentioned the pretentious David Lynch? There is so much to choose from.

    My official answer is Mulholland Drive. It is a mash-up of a TV pilot and a soft core porn film that is completely incoherent. I may be influenced by the fact that I watched it only a few months ago. You see, I’d read: “Mulholland Drive is widely regarded as one of Lynch’s finest works and one of the greatest films of the 21st century, ranking 28th in the 2012 Sight & Sound critics’ poll of the best films ever made, and topping a 2016 poll by BBC Culture of the best films since 2000.” Proving that the more obscure you make something, the more “sophisticated” people will claim to appreciate it.

    David Lynch is the cleverest director of his time. It only took me four viewings to get Mulholland Drive. Lost Highway is a little tougher.

    • #118
  29. Sisyphus Member
    Sisyphus
    @Sisyphus

    Flicker (View Comment):

    Sisyphus (View Comment):

    Exodus: Gods and Kings, here’s a clip where El Shaddai is portrayed by a small boy mouthing dialogue that is inappropriate but, among other flaws, assumes that God has to ask what Moses is thinking.

    The whole movie plays God as a child having a temper tantrum.

    Lord have mercy.

    Chris “Baal” Bale said Moses clearly was psychotic and hallucinating and he played him that way. But this doesn’t count as a movie. It’s anti-christian propaganda. The by the way, the public just wasn’t interested.

    The topic is worst movie. I think any film that intentionally and continuously offends the Creator and His children has to be considered. Many, many movies are anti-Christian propaganda. If it were a disqualifier Apple’s Trailers app might have three entries. Or less. 

    • #119
  30. LC Member
    LC
    @LidensCheng

    Reading through the comments, some people here have a really different take on terrible movies than I do. When I think of godawful bad movies, I think of Battlefield Earth, The Room, Gigli, Zaat, and various Adam Sandler movies. But Zoolander, Taxi Driver, The Exorcist, Spaceballs? Man, this is a tough crowd. Either that or you guys don’t sit around and watch really really bad movies and do your own version of MST3K like I do.

    • #120
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