Ricochet Movie Fight Club: Question 18

 

Last week Brian Watt came out of his corner raging for a Page One knockout. Philo’s Page Three uppercut sent him reeling and Brian ended up clinging to the ropes, eying the clock but still upright when the final bell sounded. His jaw may be a little sore today, but not too sore to ask: What is the worst movie (not a made-for-TV movie) ever made?

From Brian:

It should be a movie shown in a movie theater produced or distributed by a major studio (MGM, Universal, United Artists, 20th Century Fox, Columbia, RKO, Warner Brothers, Disney, etc.); a movie that others may have raved about which prompted you to see it; that was so bad, you may have walked out or griped about it and felt cheated for wasting your money on it; so bad that you may have even heckled it or made catcalls at the screen in the theater while watching it; and so bad that you may actually think less of others’ taste in movies – whether critics, celebrities, or friends — who actually hold this awful film in high regard.

Of course, the more comprehensive your answer on why the movie is so awful, the more persuasive your answer will be.

The Rules:

  • Post your answer as a comment. Make it clear that this is your official answer, one per member.
  • Defend your answer in the comments and fight it out with other Ricochet member answers for the rest of the week.
  • Whoever gets the most likes on their official answer comment (and only that comment) by Friday night wins the fight.
  • The winner gets the honor of posting the next question on Saturday.
  • In the case of a tie, the member who posted the question will decide the winner.

Notes:

  • Only movies will qualify (no TV shows) however films that air on television (BBC films, a stand-alone mini-series) will qualify.
  • Your answer can be as off-the-wall or controversial as you’d like. It will be up to you to defend it and win people to your side.
  • Fight it out.

Special thanks to Arahant for compiling a list of previous questions.

Movie Fight Club Questions by Week:

  1. What is the best film portrayal of a book character? Winner: Charlotte with 18 likes for Alan Rickman’s portrayal of Professor Severus Snape in the Harry Potter movies.
  2. What is the best motion picture comedy of the 21st century? Winner: split decision. In an exemplary display of genuine sportsmanship, Randy Webster conceded the fight to Marjorie Reynolds’ pick Team America: World Police.
  3. What film provides the most evocative use of location? Winner: Taras with 21 likes for Lawrence of Arabia. Wasn’t even close.
  4. What is the best film that utilizes or is inspired by a work of William Shakespeare? Winner: Dr. Bastiat with five likes for The Lion King, a film inspired by Hamlet
  5. Which movie has the best surprise ending, or unexpected plot twist? Winner: Repmodad with 18 likes for The Sixth Sense
  6. What pre-1970s black-and-white movie would be most enjoyed by a modern 18-to 25-year-old audience? Winner: E J Hill with 9 likes for a Casablanca. (He didn’t exactly designate it his official answer, and most of the likes may have been for the modern Casablanca trailer rather than for it as an answer to the question, but nobody seemed to dispute it on those grounds, so that’s how the cookie crumbles.)
  7. What movie did you go to based on the trailer, only to have felt cheated? (i.e., the trailer was 10x better than the movie?) Winner: Back to back wins by E J Hill with 9 likes for Something to Talk About.
  8. Name the worst movie portrayal of your profession (where applicable.) Winner: LC with 8 likes for Denise Richards’ Dr. Christmas Jones in The World is Not Enough.
  9. What is the worst movie that claims to be based or inspired by a true story? Winner: Tex929rr with 16 likes for the, “…terrible acting, and countless deviations from history,” in Pearl Harbor.
  10. What is your favorite little known movie? Winner: A last-minute rally for Tremors made the difference as Songwriter took the week 10 win! 
  11. What is the best movie that you never want to watch again? Winner: Hitler Charlotte with 15 likes for Schindler’s List. Sorry, Richard Oshea but Jesus won the real fight. 

    Week 11.5 Exhibition Match (as a make-up of sorts, since Songwriter didn’t get the week 11 question submitted in time)
    Name the best movie theme song ever? No winner declared but I’m pretty sure it was I.M. Fine with “Moon River.”
  12. Name the best animated feature-length movie of all time. Winner: I.M. Fine with 10 likes for Pinocchio, and justice for I.M. Fine prevailed.
  13. What is the worst acting performance in an otherwise good film? Winner: In one of the most brutal fights we’ve seen yet Repmodad fended off a furious 12th-round onslaught by Gary McVey to give Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves the win with 20 likes.
  14. What is the quintessential American movie? Winner: Miffed White Male pulled off the comeback with 20 likes for The Right Stuff.  There was a two-way tie at 19 for second place as well. 
  15. What’s the most entertaining movie set during WWII? Winner: Arahant clearly won with Casablanca’s walloping 30 likes despite the withering onslaught by Sisyphus on the final day.
  16. What is the best movie love story? Winner: Songwriter with 20 likes for The Princess Bride with 20 likes. Up managed to make a strong showing and Dr. Bastiat is still conducting recounts trying to “find” some uncounted votes. 
  17. What’s the best’ buddy’ movie? Winner: Brian Watt wins with 12 likes for The Man Who Would be King.

 

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  1. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    Charlotte (View Comment):

    Hypothesis: the weirdness of a Ricochet conversation increases at a faster rate as the comment count approaches 300.

    You need to adjust for the number of PITsters in the thread.  We specialize in weirdness and tangents.

    • #301
  2. Skyler Coolidge
    Skyler
    @Skyler

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    PITsters

    ?

    • #302
  3. Ed G. Inactive
    Ed G.
    @EdG

    Brian Watt (View Comment):

    Ed G. (View Comment):

    Skyler (View Comment):

    Ed G. (View Comment):

     

    Right. Howard the Duck is unworthy of this particular title. The differential between expectation and reality is slim on this one. However, a movie like, say, Taxi Driver has Grand Canyon sized differential.

    I guess it’s like a race to see who can run the slowest. You can always go slower.

    You’ve never seen me run.

    More racist remarks.

    That’s only a runner up to my last racist remark.

    • #303
  4. Randy Webster Member
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    Skyler (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    PITsters

    ?

    People who post in the PIT, a true chronophage.

    • #304
  5. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Skyler (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    PITsters

    ?

    People who post in the PIT, a true chronophage.

    The current one just passed 37,000 comments.  Since late March.

    • #305
  6. Vince Guerra Member
    Vince Guerra
    @VinceGuerra

    Charlotte (View Comment):

    Hypothesis: the weirdness of a Ricochet conversation increases at a faster rate as the comment count approaches 300.

    In inverse proportion to the number of people who still follow it.

    • #306
  7. Randy Webster Member
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Skyler (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    PITsters

    ?

    People who post in the PIT, a true chronophage.

    The current one just passed 37,000 comments. Since late March.

    Lol.  I figured.  That’s why I said it was a chronophage.

    • #307
  8. Skyler Coolidge
    Skyler
    @Skyler

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Skyler (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    PITsters

    ?

    People who post in the PIT, a true chronophage.

    The current one just passed 37,000 comments. Since late March.

    Okay, then what’s a PIT?

    • #308
  9. Saint Augustine Member
    Saint Augustine
    @SaintAugustine

    Skyler (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Skyler (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    PITsters

    ?

    People who post in the PIT, a true chronophage.

    The current one just passed 37,000 comments. Since late March.

    Okay, then what’s a PIT?

    Politically Incorrect Thread. A Ricochet tradition.

    https://ricochet.com/735345/pit-20-quarantined

    • #309
  10. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Charlotte (View Comment):

    Hypothesis: the weirdness of a Ricochet conversation increases at a faster rate as the comment count approaches 300.

    In the latest PIT, we’re over 37,000. You want weird?

    • #310
  11. Vince Guerra Member
    Vince Guerra
    @VinceGuerra

    Well, friends, there is a lot to unpack here but I’ll try and give it a go. First off, can we get a slow clap for @brianwatt for delivering a 300 comment question.

    Now, with that out of the way (thanks a ton buddy), let me also revisit some of what we’ve learned about each other:

    @lidenscheng (LC) it seems likes to spend an inordinate amount of time watching bad movies and has no qualms about admitting it.

    @addictionisachoice may be the only apologist left for the collective body of work of Jennifer Aniston.

    @josepluma , in grand Seinfeldian fashion, “Chooses not to fight.”

    and,

    @taras has an aptitude for dropping Dennis Miller-style, obscure historical references.

    We also learned there is a surprisingly large contingent of passionate Zoolander defenders. Of course, I also know of many passionate defenders of Socialism, but hey, you be you.

    With that said, and much left unsaid, here is where we stand:

    Leading the pack is @brianwatt himself with 16 likes for Barbarella (comment#58), followed closely by @henryv (B.W. Wooster that is) with 14 likes for The Hobbit (comment #79). Not far behind them is @gosammercat with 12 likes for The English Patient that Elaine Benes hopes will just die already (comment #55) , and running a distant fourth is @occupantcdn with 9 likes for Howard the Duck (comment #188), which ordinarily wouldn’t register on the leader board except for the fact that I’m always impressed with a fighter laying down some moxie on page 9.

    So, there you have it. One day left to make your case, change your likes, bribe some members, or, sit back and have a watch party for Zoolander on a Portland street corner with all your rowdy friends.

    I need a beer.

    • #311
  12. Randy Webster Member
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    Vince Guerra (View Comment):
    So, there you have it. One day left to make your case, change your likes, bribe some members, or, sit back and have a watch party for Zoolander on a Portland street corner with all your rowdy friends.

    All my rowdy friends have settled down.

    • #312
  13. Sisyphus Member
    Sisyphus
    @Sisyphus

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Vince Guerra (View Comment):
    So, there you have it. One day left to make your case, change your likes, bribe some members, or, sit back and have a watch party for Zoolander on a Portland street corner with all your rowdy friends.

    All my rowdy friends have settled down.

    Tell them it’s a pin the tail on the Trump party.

    • #313
  14. OccupantCDN Coolidge
    OccupantCDN
    @OccupantCDN

    Barbarella is a bad movie? I love that movie! Jane Fonda made it great!

    For a moment I was going to claim it was Jane Fonda’s best movie – but then I recalled Cat Ballou.

    • #314
  15. Vince Guerra Member
    Vince Guerra
    @VinceGuerra

    OccupantCDN (View Comment):

    Barbarella is a bad movie? I love that movie! Jane Fonda made it great!

    For a moment I was going to claim it was Jane Fonda’s best movie – but then I recalled Cat Ballou.

    I can forgive the sins of a quality actor like Donald Sutherland, but not those of a hollow log like Jane Fonda. 

    • #315
  16. Randy Webster Member
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    Vince Guerra (View Comment):
    but not those of a hollow log like Jane Fonda. 

    Is that the same as saying she’s wooden?

    • #316
  17. Sisyphus Member
    Sisyphus
    @Sisyphus

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Vince Guerra (View Comment):
    but not those of a hollow log like Jane Fonda.

    Is that the same as saying she’s wooden?

    All bark.

    • #317
  18. Taras Coolidge
    Taras
    @Taras

    Vince Guerra (View Comment):

    OccupantCDN (View Comment):

    Barbarella is a bad movie? I love that movie! Jane Fonda made it great!

    For a moment I was going to claim it was Jane Fonda’s best movie – but then I recalled Cat Ballou.

    I can forgive the sins of a quality actor like Donald Sutherland, but not those of a hollow log like Jane Fonda.

    “That’s a regular — Tintoretto!”

    • #318
  19. Vince Guerra Member
    Vince Guerra
    @VinceGuerra

    No change in the voting means that a) we’re all done with this question, and b) Brian Watt joins E.J. Hill as the only other back-to-back winner with 16 likes for Barbarella. Brian will get another crack at it by choosing the week 19 question. Can he make it three? In the words of Johnny Lawrence: “Good match.”

    • #319
  20. Brian Watt Inactive
    Brian Watt
    @BrianWatt

    Vince Guerra (View Comment):

    No change in the voting means that a) we’re all done with this question, and b) Brian Watt joins E.J. Hill as the only other back-to-back winner with 16 likes for Barbarella. Brian will get another crack at it by choosing the week 19 question. Can he make it three? In the words of Johnny Lawrence: “Good match.”

    Thanks Vince and thanks for everyone who appeared to detest Barbarella as much as I did. I’ve submitted the next question for the Fight Club that Vince should share with you soon. All the best.

    • #320
  21. Vince Guerra Member
    Vince Guerra
    @VinceGuerra

    Brian Watt (View Comment):
    I’ve submitted the next question for the Fight Club that Vince should share with you soon.

    Since it’s come up from a few of you, a reminder: The question is always posted on Saturday, usually in mid-morning, Pacific time.

    • #321
  22. The Scarecrow Thatcher
    The Scarecrow
    @TheScarecrow

    Matt Bartle (View Comment):

    Too easy to put down Plan 9 From Outer Space. How about a Best Picture winner?

    I thought American Beauty was just awful. Not a recognizable human being among the characters. It’s been a long time since I saw it, but these are some things I think I remember: a bad boy teenager who turns out to be a sensitive filmmaker. A guy who thinks that working a fast-food drivethrough is the easiest job there is. An anti-gay military type who turns out to be gay. (Gee, there’s something we’ve never seen before!)

    It had one chance to make an impact on Hollywood and it failed: it should have sent the message that if you want to win a Best Picture Oscar, you have topless cheerleaders. But no, it couldn’t even do that. So it’s irredeemable.

    Official answer.

    I came late to this party, but yes, this was my first reaction. American Beauty is the only movie I can think of that I started hating in the first few minutes, and my hatred grew with each subsequent scene.  I was sitting there incredulous, wondering (aloud) who this effing piece of puerile, predictable, insulting, . . . Gaaah! Every deep poignant “issue” raised was fought and settled years ago – who the eff was this thing made to impress??

    Sorry.  I’m STILL ranting. This won the Oscar that year. That was when I finally gave up any defence of them and realized the Oscars are a complete joke. 

    • #322
  23. The Scarecrow Thatcher
    The Scarecrow
    @TheScarecrow

    Barfly (View Comment):

    ShellGamer (View Comment):

    Why has no one mentioned the pretentious David Lynch? There is so much to choose from.

    My official answer is Mulholland Drive. It is a mash-up of a TV pilot and a soft core porn film that is completely incoherent. I may be influenced by the fact that I watched it only a few months ago. You see, I’d read: “Mulholland Drive is widely regarded as one of Lynch’s finest works and one of the greatest films of the 21st century, ranking 28th in the 2012 Sight & Sound critics’ poll of the best films ever made, and topping a 2016 poll by BBC Culture of the best films since 2000.” Proving that the more obscure you make something, the more “sophisticated” people will claim to appreciate it.

    David Lynch is the cleverest director of his time. It only took me four viewings to get Mulholland Drive. Lost Highway is a little tougher.

    MD is one of my top ten faves of all time. (Though my sons remind me that I have about 50 top ten faves of all time.) Naomi Watts is indescribably good here.

    It’s not for everybody, but when you get on its wavelenght, that movie is endlessly interesting – you wonder how he does it.

    David Lynch is the real deal. 

    • #323
  24. The Scarecrow Thatcher
    The Scarecrow
    @TheScarecrow

    Flicker (View Comment):

    How about Birdman of Alcatraz? Starring Burt Lancaster! I never saw it, though. Who wants to see a movie about a convicted murderer turned amateur bird vet?

    Per wikipedia: A surly convicted murderer held in permanent isolation redeems himself when he becomes a renowned bird expert.

    @flicker, It’s lovely. And based on a true story.

    You might be interested in a few books I read recently: The Soul of an Octopus and The Good, Good Pig, both by Sy Montgomery, and especially Running With Sherman: the Donkey With the Heart of a Hero, by Christopher McDougall.  All are about our regrettably lost yet complicated relationship with animals.  Birdman doesn’t seem unlikely at all to me, more like inevitable.

    Okay, back to topic . . .

    • #324
  25. Barfly Member
    Barfly
    @Barfly

    The Scarecrow (View Comment):

    Barfly (View Comment):

    ShellGamer (View Comment):

    Why has no one mentioned the pretentious David Lynch? There is so much to choose from.

    My official answer is Mulholland Drive. It is a mash-up of a TV pilot and a soft core porn film that is completely incoherent. I may be influenced by the fact that I watched it only a few months ago. You see, I’d read: “Mulholland Drive is widely regarded as one of Lynch’s finest works and one of the greatest films of the 21st century, ranking 28th in the 2012 Sight & Sound critics’ poll of the best films ever made, and topping a 2016 poll by BBC Culture of the best films since 2000.” Proving that the more obscure you make something, the more “sophisticated” people will claim to appreciate it.

    David Lynch is the cleverest director of his time. It only took me four viewings to get Mulholland Drive. Lost Highway is a little tougher.

    MD is one of my top ten faves of all time. (Though my sons remind me that I have about 50 top ten faves of all time.) Naomi Watts is indescribably good here.

    It’s not for everybody, but when you get on its wavelenght, that movie is endlessly interesting – you wonder how he does it.

    David Lynch is the real deal.

    Yeah, half of the fun of a Lynch movie is thinking about how Lynch made it. I’m convinced that he’s quite aware of that and he plays that level of interpretation as well as any other.

    The Cowboy and the Frenchman, for instance, seems to be a satire of how the French think Americans think the French see them. He might have folded it once more, even, but I lose track. 

    • #325
  26. The Scarecrow Thatcher
    The Scarecrow
    @TheScarecrow

    James Hageman (View Comment):

    Ishtar. Official answer.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wbcje5NRcc8

    I wanted to hate it, but any movie that contains the song “I’m Leaving You Some Love in My Will” is worth giving another chance.

    Also:

    Telling the truth can be a dangerous business

    Honest and popular don’t go hand in hand.

    If you admit that you can play the accordian

    You’ll never get a job in a rock-n-roll band.

     

    And that’s from memory!  C’mon, who can turn away from this glorious project?

    Plus, Isabel Adjani.

     

    • #326
  27. Brian Watt Inactive
    Brian Watt
    @BrianWatt

    • #327
  28. The Scarecrow Thatcher
    The Scarecrow
    @TheScarecrow

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Joseph Stanko (View Comment):
    You’re almost making me want to see Howard the Duck. That’s got to be some sort of an achievement.

    It is an achievement, but as someone who bears no hate for you, I say you should probably avoid it. The experience will not improve you in any way. It also may possibly cause future PTSD. It will be seared, seared! into your brain. Only amnesia will be able to help you. You may take to purposefully incurring brain damage to try to erase that experience, but it may not work. You’ll wind up homeless, not knowing your name or address, but remembering that awful movie.

    Yes. Ishtar is definitely worth seeing for the reason you describe – I believe it was made terrible on purpose, written and edited expertly to just leave you gasping. So it is actually a brilliant movie for one who has eyes to see. (And Paul Williams wrote the songs, a great songsmith tasked to write believable yet cringeworthy songs. And boy does he deliver.)

     

    Howard the Duck is just bad. Not interesting bad, insulting bad.

    • #328
  29. Vince Guerra Member
    Vince Guerra
    @VinceGuerra

    The Scarecrow (View Comment):

    Matt Bartle (View Comment):

    Too easy to put down Plan 9 From Outer Space. How about a Best Picture winner?

    I thought American Beauty was just awful. Not a recognizable human being among the characters. It’s been a long time since I saw it, but these are some things I think I remember: a bad boy teenager who turns out to be a sensitive filmmaker. A guy who thinks that working a fast-food drivethrough is the easiest job there is. An anti-gay military type who turns out to be gay. (Gee, there’s something we’ve never seen before!)

    It had one chance to make an impact on Hollywood and it failed: it should have sent the message that if you want to win a Best Picture Oscar, you have topless cheerleaders. But no, it couldn’t even do that. So it’s irredeemable.

    Official answer.

    I came late to this party, but yes, this was my first reaction. American Beauty is the only movie I can think of that I started hating in the first few minutes, and my hatred grew with each subsequent scene. I was sitting there incredulous, wondering (aloud) who this effing piece of puerile, predictable, insulting, . . . Gaaah! Every deep poignant “issue” raised was fought and settled years ago – who the eff was this thing made to impress??

    Sorry. I’m STILL ranting. This won the Oscar that year. That was when I finally gave up any defence of them and realized the Oscars are a complete joke.

    This would have been my second choice, and for all the same reasons. 

    • #329
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