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In a remarkable turnaround from just a week ago when concepts such as law and order were deemed less popular than the coronavirus, pollsters across the country are now reporting that lawfulness has reached a record high approval rating, particularly among minorities.
As sociologists struggled to explain what could be motivating an unprecedented number of Americans of all backgrounds to support peaceful protesters over violent mobs, firemen over arsonists and the police over looters, public officials at every level of government scrambled to signal to their constituents their support for the rule of law.
According to pollsters, the rise in popularity of law and order transcended all political, racial, gender and socioeconomic lines and coincides with a new spirit of joyful anarchy in American cities. The spike in popularity for the enforcement of laws was most stark among minority-owned businesses. Working-class African Americans, who’ve been disproportionately impacted by the recent spate of indoor fireworks, the spontaneous borrowing of unsold stereo equipment and a laissez-faire approach to downtown window fronts have demonstrated the starkest spike in support for the rule of law.
Some minorities struggled to understand why their businesses have been targeted by the devil-may-care attitude of civil rights protesters in the first place. Speaking in front of the smoldering ruins of what was the small grocery store that had been owned by his family for three generations, one Atlanta resident spoke for many when he said that these new norms counterintuitively hurt his community: “I always worried that if we lost the business I’d have to go to work at Target” said the lifelong Georgian, who no longer need worry as his local Target is also now a hole in the ground.
At press time the former small business owner, who wished to remain anonymous because of his anti-crime stance, was wondering what impact the burning down of the local police station would have on local property values.Published in