I Won!

 

Yesterday he thought he could sneak into my office without detection. He had no idea what he was up against. Although I lost him temporarily, I knew he’d be back. They just can’t stay away.

Sure enough, there he was this morning! He wasn’t going anywhere on my watch. Frantically I threw everything off the lower shelf of my bookcase. There! I lurched at him with a towel, but to no avail. But I was determined. I decided I’d have to catch him with my bare hands.

There! Got him! He struggled to get loose, and lost his tail in the effort. There I stood, holding his thrashing body as his body-less tail kept time. Now there was no escape.

Could somebody help me put my books away?

He was huge, I tell you, huge!!! (His cousin)

Welcome to Florida.

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  1. Limestone Cowboy Coolidge
    Limestone Cowboy
    @LimestoneCowboy

    Rent a cat. They will umm.. dispatch the critter.

    • #1
  2. Susan Quinn Contributor
    Susan Quinn
    @SusanQuinn

    Oh no, those guys eat the bugs! Which are worse!

    • #2
  3. danys Thatcher
    danys
    @danys

    Ah, lizards. Not just in Florida. We have them in southern California, too.

    One night while sleeping I stretched, my hand slid under the pillow. A cool toy wrapped around my finger. “What toy is that?” I wondered sleepily.

    Instantly, I awoke, heart pounding. That wasn’t a toy. It was a lizard. I tried brushing it away with my pillow but the cold intruder would not leave.

    I woke up Mr. danys and he removed it for me. 

    Unpleasant things around my face creep me out. 

    • #3
  4. EB Thatcher
    EB
    @EB

    We have lots of geckos on our lanai, but for some reason the rarely get in the house.  I only see the occasional frog around the pool.  But yesterday, Mr. Eb had to remove a frog that had gotten into our master suite hallway.  (“It’s the man’s job”…to handle bugs, remove critters, etc.)  Then this morning, when moving out a piece of furniture, I discovered a dead frog.   Mr. Eb said it was so stiff, it had to have been dead for some time.  Guess I should move the furniture more often.

    • #4
  5. Susan Quinn Contributor
    Susan Quinn
    @SusanQuinn

    danys (View Comment):

    Ah, lizards. Not just in Florida. We have them in southern California, too.

    One night while sleeping I stretched, my hand slid under the pillow. A cool toy wrapped around my finger. “What toy is that?” I wondered sleepily.

    Instantly, I awoke, heart pounding. That wasn’t a toy. It was a lizard. I tried brushing it away with my pillow but the cold intruder would not leave.

    I woke up Mr. danys and he removed it for me.

    Unpleasant things around my face creep me out.

    Yikes! We had a gecko in our condo on vacation in Hawaii. My husband kept tickling my neck in bed.   G.rrrrr… 

    • #5
  6. colleenb Member
    colleenb
    @colleenb

    EB (View Comment):

    We have lots of geckos on our lanai, but for some reason the rarely get in the house. I only see the occasional frog around the pool. But yesterday, Mr. Eb had to remove a frog that had gotten into our master suite hallway. (“It’s the man’s job”…to handle bugs, remove critters, etc.) Then this morning, when moving out a piece of furniture, I discovered a dead frog. Mr. Eb said it was so stiff, it had to have been dead for some time. Guess I should move the furniture more often.

    Absolutely the man’s job. Also I think he should move the furniture – a win/win for you.

    • #6
  7. Dave of Barsham Member
    Dave of Barsham
    @LesserSonofBarsham

    We haven’t had any get in the house yet this year (the cats always find them and show them off), but I went to cover some porch furniture because of incoming rain and four or five scattered. Tis’ the season! May they eat all the bugs they can…outside. 

    • #7
  8. Vance Richards Inactive
    Vance Richards
    @VanceRichards

    As the Good Book says, “a lizard can be caught with the hand, yet it is found in kings’ palaces.”

    • #8
  9. Tree Rat Inactive
    Tree Rat
    @RichardFinlay

    Anoles can get in the house in unusual ways.  We had one come up through the overflow slot in the bathroom sink.  He (?) had trouble getting out of the sink for some reason, so was easily trapped and removed.  The Florida Room, having a drain to the outside, is always home to at least one.  Some are dumb enough to be unable to find their way out again and are found after they have been very, very still for a while.  The worst is when they set off the alarm and we hear from ADT or Largo police.

    • #9
  10. The Scarecrow Thatcher
    The Scarecrow
    @TheScarecrow

    Maybe you should take the hint and consider switching to Geiko.

    • #10
  11. Doug Watt Member
    Doug Watt
    @DougWatt

    These are the lizards that are very dangerous.

    • #11
  12. Susan Quinn Contributor
    Susan Quinn
    @SusanQuinn

    Dave of Barsham (View Comment):
    We haven’t had any get in the house yet this year (the cats always find them and show them off), but I went to cover some porch furniture because of incoming rain and four or five scattered. Tis’ the season! May they eat all the bugs they can…outside. 

    They love our lanai and it’s fun to see them skitter around. They rarely come inside. My husband doesn’t want anything to do with catching them!

    • #12
  13. Susan Quinn Contributor
    Susan Quinn
    @SusanQuinn

    Tree Rat (View Comment):
    The worst is when they set off the alarm and we hear from ADT or Largo police.

    Oh no!!

    • #13
  14. GLDIII Temporarily Essential Reagan
    GLDIII Temporarily Essential
    @GLDIII

    This is Florida right? 

    If you cornered this lizard I think we would be impressed.

    • #14
  15. Susan Quinn Contributor
    Susan Quinn
    @SusanQuinn

    GLDIII Temporarily Essential (View Comment):

    This is Florida right?

    If you cornered this lizard I think we would be impressed.

    And I would be going to the Happy Hunting Grounds!

    • #15
  16. JustmeinAZ Member
    JustmeinAZ
    @JustmeinAZ

    At least it wasn’t a rat. Or a scorpion.

    • #16
  17. Clifford A. Brown Member
    Clifford A. Brown
    @CliffordBrown

    Susan Quinn (View Comment):

    danys (View Comment):

    Ah, lizards. Not just in Florida. We have them in southern California, too.

    One night while sleeping I stretched, my hand slid under the pillow. A cool toy wrapped around my finger. “What toy is that?” I wondered sleepily.

    Instantly, I awoke, heart pounding. That wasn’t a toy. It was a lizard. I tried brushing it away with my pillow but the cold intruder would not leave.

    I woke up Mr. danys and he removed it for me.

    Unpleasant things around my face creep me out.

    Yikes! We had a gecko in our condo on vacation in Hawaii. My husband kept tickling my neck in bed. G.rrrrr…

    They are considered good luck in my neck of the woods. People painted a gecko on the inside plaster walls in old Spanish style homes. Why? Geckos apparently enjoy eating small scorpions and all the insects scorpions need for food.

    • #17
  18. aardo vozz Member
    aardo vozz
    @aardovozz

    danys (View Comment):

    Ah, lizards. Not just in Florida. We have them in southern California, too.

    And also, unfortunately, in Washington, D.C. , which contains an altogether different and slimier species….

     

    • #18
  19. J Ro Member
    J Ro
    @JRo

    Clifford A. Brown (View Comment):

    Susan Quinn (View Comment):

    danys (View Comment):

    Ah, lizards. Not just in Florida. We have them in southern California, too.

    One night while sleeping I stretched, my hand slid under the pillow. A cool toy wrapped around my finger. “What toy is that?” I wondered sleepily.

    Instantly, I awoke, heart pounding. That wasn’t a toy. It was a lizard. I tried brushing it away with my pillow but the cold intruder would not leave.

    I woke up Mr. danys and he removed it for me.

    Unpleasant things around my face creep me out.

    Yikes! We had a gecko in our condo on vacation in Hawaii. My husband kept tickling my neck in bed. G.rrrrr…

    They are considered good luck in my neck of the woods. People painted a gecko on the inside plaster walls in old Spanish style homes. Why? Geckos apparently enjoy eating small scorpions and all the insects scorpions need for food.

    Indeed! In Japanese the word for gecko is “palace protector”.

    • #19
  20. Eeyore Member
    Eeyore
    @Eeyore

    Doug Watt (View Comment):

    These are the lizards that are very dangerous.

    Description of the guy with whom he had an altercation at the bar, given to Officer Watt by shroomed arrestee.

    • #20
  21. Front Seat Cat Member
    Front Seat Cat
    @FrontSeatCat

    Yes he was big and ugly! Yukk!  For a minute there, I thought your haunted balloon was back……

    • #21
  22. Susan Quinn Contributor
    Susan Quinn
    @SusanQuinn

    Front Seat Cat (View Comment):

    Yes he was big and ugly! Yukk! For a minute there, I thought your haunted balloon was back……

    Actually Boris passed away, but Natasha sits next to my computer, still. She’s pretty much calmed down . . .  ;-)

    • #22
  23. Stad Coolidge
    Stad
    @Stad

    Limestone Cowboy (View Comment):

    Rent a cat. They will umm.. dispatch the critter.

    They knock over more books – and anything else you have resting on a horizontal surface . . .

    • #23
  24. Suspira Member
    Suspira
    @Suspira

    My office complex (Would that I could go there!) has ivy as ground cover and little, iridescent purple-and-blue lizards loved it and thrived there. One day as I got into my car, one of those lizards darted inside. I leaped out, door open, and looked for it everywhere. I could not find that lizard. Eventually I bowed to the inevitable and got in and drove home, knowing a lizard could appear at my feet at any moment.

    It didn’t. It never did. Then I fretted about the possibility of a mouldering lizard carcass in the car. Never found that, either. Perhaps it was too small to emit much of a stink as it decayed. Or maybe it had escaped, although I couldn’t understand how. It remains in my mind as the Missing Lizard Mystery.

    • #24
  25. Cow Girl Thatcher
    Cow Girl
    @CowGirl

    When I was first married and living in San Diego with my Navy guy husband, I encountered my first lizard. There are NO lizards in the high-altitude valley in the Wyoming Rocky Mountains where we grew up.

    I was in my kitchen, and I turned to see what my cat was playing with, and upon seeing the lizard (maybe 5 inches) I immediately vaulted to the top of the dining table, and picked up the phone to dial the police.

    But, I caught my breath and called my friend (who grew up in California) and got her advice instead. My cat had killed it by then, and was just tossing it into the air and bashing it about.

    Now, four states and many cats later…I’m living in the desert, and when I find a lizard, it’s usually just a little desiccated mummy of its former self, under a rug where it ran to get away from our current predator, The Queen.

    • #25
  26. Richard Fulmer Inactive
    Richard Fulmer
    @RichardFulmer

    We’ve got ’em in Texas, too.  I’ve gotten pretty good at herding them out the door and back into the garden.  Failing that, I set a glass over them, slip a stiff piece of paper under the glass (and the lizard), and carry it outside.  Usually, they’re happy to escape the glass, but sometimes they cling to it for dear life.  Talking reason to them doesn’t seem to help.

    • #26
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