Almost Heaven

 

My more attractive, talented partner in marriage and myself were sitting around discussing what today’s social distancing hath wrought. And what to do about it. I had a stack of once-watched DVD’s on the table with Amadeus and Lawrence of Arabia on top — great films notable for their length. We both agreed that, in times of panic, go for the Directors’ Cuts.

But it just didn’t work. Is that all there is? So we arrived at the best (only?) solution for fearless, devil-may-care Americans. Road Trip!

(Cue Willie and “On the Road Again.”)

Off to Western Maryland, down to West Virginia and Winchester, VA (home of Patsy Cline), and back home. About 225 miles, three states, six hours with stops, and many breaths of fresh air.

We traveled through the extraordinary Cumberland Gap — a historic piece of American geography — and spent a lot of time saluting the people of West Virginia, now at the bottom of US states with … well, you know. We saw houses with the wealthy. We saw houses with the poor. We saw strip malls — some of which had people in them — and we saw a lot of Dollar General Stores — all of which had people in them.

So life after the big C-19 doesn’t have to be about visiting your inner couch potato or that $2,000 treadmill, and it doesn’t have to be irresponsible. There’s a world out there. Take advantage of it.

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  1. iWe Coolidge
    iWe
    @iWe

    Sounds good! You should have stopped by and met the iWe clan, in the City that Reads.

    • #1
  2. Hoyacon Member
    Hoyacon
    @Hoyacon

    iWe (View Comment):

    Sounds good! You should have stopped by and met the iWe clan, in the City that Reads.

    Charm City?   Unfortunately, we didn’t get much closer than Frederick, but if Fells Point ever opens up again  . . .

    I see the mayor has asked civic minded crooks and drug dealers to stop shooting people for awhile to free up hospital space.  You can’t make this stuff up.

     

    • #2
  3. iWe Coolidge
    iWe
    @iWe

    Hoyacon (View Comment):

    iWe (View Comment):

    Sounds good! You should have stopped by and met the iWe clan, in the City that Reads.

    Charm City? Unfortunately, we didn’t get much closer than Frederick, but if Fells Point ever opens up again . . .

    I see the mayor has asked civic minded crooks and drug dealers to stop shooting people for awhile to free up hospital space. You can’t make this stuff up.

     

    AND they have formally decided not to prosecute the vast majority of crimes, AND they released as many criminals as possible because jails are unsafe places…

     

    • #3
  4. Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo… Thatcher
    Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo…
    @GumbyMark

    Sounds like a nice way to pass a few hours in calm. We are planning some day driving trips as well. 

    • #4
  5. Hoyacon Member
    Hoyacon
    @Hoyacon

    Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo… (View Comment):

    Sounds like a nice way to pass a few hours in calm. We are planning some day driving trips as well.

    True.  There’s practically no one on the road, you’re in an enclosed environment (with music), and we allocated two wipes and a rubber glove in case we stopped for gas or anything else.  What’s not to like?  

    • #5
  6. OldPhil Coolidge
    OldPhil
    @OldPhil

    Winchester is near where we live.

    (home of Patsy Cline)

    “Crazy . . .”

    • #6
  7. Hoyacon Member
    Hoyacon
    @Hoyacon

    OldPhil (View Comment):

    Winchester is near where we live.

    (home of Patsy Cline)

    “Crazy . . .”

    You know, I remember that now from the discussion about VA counties seceding to W VA.  I’ve never been but I assume her house has a little museum or something.  That stretch of W VA from Romney into Winchester is a challenging drive–curvy and mountainous.

    • #7
  8. OldPhil Coolidge
    OldPhil
    @OldPhil

    Hoyacon (View Comment):

    OldPhil (View Comment):

    Winchester is near where we live.

    (home of Patsy Cline)

    “Crazy . . .”

    You know, I remember that now from the discussion about VA counties seceding to W VA. I’ve never been but I assume her house has a little museum or something. That stretch of W VA from Romney into Winchester is a challenging drive–curvy and mountainous.

    Yes, there’s a museum, and we have not been there yet. She’s buried in a cemetery about 5 miles from our house.

    And we have to drive that curvy road a lot. Much of my remaining family on Mom’s side lives in or near Keyser, WV.

    • #8
  9. Gary Robbins Reagan
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    Please tell me that this is a joke.  How sure are you that you didn’t infect others?  You know better.  You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break.  Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!  

    • #9
  10. RandR Member
    RandR
    @RandR

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    One has to have the virus to infect others. Are you certain the @hoyacon’s are inflected?

    • #10
  11. OldPhil Coolidge
    OldPhil
    @OldPhil

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    Must . . . resist . . . commenting . . .

    • #11
  12. Hoyacon Member
    Hoyacon
    @Hoyacon

    OldPhil (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    Must . . . resist . . . commenting . . .

    My sentiments exactly.

    • #12
  13. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    They…were…in…a…car…

    • #13
  14. Hoyacon Member
    Hoyacon
    @Hoyacon

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    They…were…in…a…car…

    To be fair, we did get out for a stretch at a couple of unpopulated scenic overlooks, which made it even easier to determine that we’d achieved at least 1500 feet of social distancing.

    • #14
  15. Gary Robbins Reagan
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    Hoyacon (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    They…were…in…a…car…

    To be fair, we did get out for a stretch at a couple of unpopulated scenic overlooks, which made it even easier to determine that we’d achieved at least 1500 feet of social distancing.

    Then I am fine with that, but I sounded like, unaware of your own status, you just threw care to the winds and mingled with all those people hanging out in Dollar Stores.  

    • #15
  16. Hoyacon Member
    Hoyacon
    @Hoyacon

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Hoyacon (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    They…were…in…a…car…

    To be fair, we did get out for a stretch at a couple of unpopulated scenic overlooks, which made it even easier to determine that we’d achieved at least 1500 feet of social distancing.

    Then I am fine with that, but I sounded like, unaware of your own status, you just threw care to the winds and mingled with all those people hanging out in Dollar Stores.

    What’s the saying?  I was born at night but not last night.

    One can generally tell how much business is being done by looking at the parking lot.

     

     

    • #16
  17. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    Hoyacon (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Please tell me that this is a joke. How sure are you that you didn’t infect others? You know better. You sound like one of the young immortals on spring break. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

    They…were…in…a…car…

    To be fair, we did get out for a stretch at a couple of unpopulated scenic overlooks, which made it even easier to determine that we’d achieved at least 1500 feet of social distancing.

    It sounds like a great way to kill a day.  I’m tempted to do a drive myself, but the car I’d want to use is my MR2, and it’s still in winter storage at my 92-year-old mothers house, and I really shouldn’t be going over there for a while. 

    That, plus it’s snowing out.  (just light flurries, but still). 

     

    • #17
  18. Richard Fulmer Inactive
    Richard Fulmer
    @RichardFulmer

    Hoyacon: My more attractive, talented partner in marriage and myself were sitting around discussing what today’s social distancing hath wrought.

    I’m totally in favor of social distancing.  I look so much better at a distance.

    • #18
  19. Suspira Member
    Suspira
    @Suspira

    There is talk of rest stops being closed. I’d need reassurance that potty breaks would not be a matter of slipping into the piney woods, as in days of yore.

    • #19
  20. Gary Robbins Reagan
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    Suspira (View Comment):

    There is talk of rest stops being closed. I’d need reassurance that potty breaks would not be a matter of slipping into the piney woods, as in days of yore.

    You said it more delicately than I was hinting at.

    I ventured out for the first time today since Tuesday, going to the Dollar General.  My first purchase was latex gloves, which I opened before paying for it.  It was so great to be out, I was driving 20 mph below the speed limit.

    • #20