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I have drawn on my vast psychic powers to make bold predictions for the coming year. Check back next December to see how many I got right.
1. A Democrat will be caught in a corruption scandal but will escape prosecution or punishment.
2. It will be warmer than usual in some part of the world at some point in time. The media will call this proof of catastrophic global warming.
3. Several public school teachers will be arrested for sexually molesting their students, but edgy comedians will still make Catholic-Priest molestation jokes based on things that happened in the 1980s.
4. A shooting will take place, but it will be quickly memory-holed because the circumstances will be “unhelpful” to media’s preferred narrative.
5. A woke feminist will become outraged because some behavior previously thought to be innocuous perpetuates rape culture and makes people feel unsafe.
6. A celebrity whose career is in decline will become an “outspoken Trump opponent.”
7. A celebrity whose career is in decline will announce that she has a transgender child and appear on several chat shows.
8. Congress will pass an enormous budget, with a huge deficit, that contains billions in wasteful spending.
9. The quality of life in California, New York, and Chicago will continue to deteriorate. Local politicians will pass laws dealing with Climate Change and LGBTQ issues.
10. Trump will Tweet something that will make the media and Conservatism, Inc., go nanners.
11. Lots more Baby Yoda memes.