“When your mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.” — Taylia, age 11
A collection of “childhood wisdom” graced my Facebook feed this week; this was one of the standouts, though there were several in the same vein: common-sense lessons learned early in life through personal experience. Some were in the “Things I’ll-never-try-again” category (“Never hold a Dustbuster and a cat at the same time.” — Kyoyo, age 9), and others check the “fool-me-once” box (“Don’t pull Dad’s finger when he tells you to.” — Emily, age 10). There’s even a Joe-Biden-in-training in the mix (“Never squat with your spurs on.” — Neil Kinnock, 1987).
The list is generally funny because the advice is both spot-on, and blindingly obvious in hindsight (“Don’t pick on your sister when she’s holding a baseball bat.” — Joel, 10). But when you’re young and learning by your own experience, this newfound wisdom may surprise you.
I asked my sister, who says she learned a lot from her kids when they were growing up, if she had any 20/20-hindsight wisdom. She said: “never assume it’s chocolate.” I’m afraid to ask for clarification.
How about you? What hard-won wisdom did you gain, either as a child or later in life? Anything you think could have made “kids say the darnedest things”? Anything your own kids or grand-kids have announced to the family with the voice of Moses on the Mount?
And remember: “Never trust a dog to watch your food.” –Patrick, age 10.