The Art of the Deal: Greenland Edition

 

Greenland in 10 years?

Donald Trump is eyeing the deal of the century. According to the Wall Street Journal, the President is interested in America purchasing the world’s largest island: Greenland.

The idea of the U.S. purchasing Greenland has captured the former real-estate developer’s imagination, according to people familiar with the discussions, who said Mr. Trump has, with varying degrees of seriousness, repeatedly expressed interest in buying the ice-covered autonomous Danish territory between the North Atlantic and Arctic oceans.

In meetings, at dinners and in passing conversations, Mr. Trump has asked advisers whether the U.S. can acquire Greenland, listened with interest when they discuss its abundant resources and geopolitical importance and, according to two of the people, has asked his White House counsel to look into the idea.

Some of his advisers have supported the concept, saying it was a good economic play, two of the people said, while others dismissed it as a fleeting fascination that will never come to fruition. It is also unclear how the U.S. would go about acquiring Greenland even if the effort were serious.

Caddy at Trump Kangilinnguit Golf Club and Casino.

Greenland is a massive chunk of land currently owned by Denmark, about one-fifth the size of the United States. The autonomously governing population is just 56,000 — so few people live there because most of what isn’t ice is bedrock. Even hearty Icelanders abandoned their settlements there centuries ago because it was impossible to sustain a self-reliant colony. Today, Denmark pays 60 percent of Greenland’s budget.

America already has a toehold on Greenland via Thule Air Base on a northwest corner of the island. But why would we want any more of the territory? The same reason we built that bleak Cold War outpost: national security.

China has sought more property in the Arctic and the Pentagon had to block three Chinese-funded airports on Greenland just last year. It would also provide a nice legacy for Trump since President Truman was unable to make the same deal.

And, let’s face it, Trump is a real estate guy. If he can get 836,000 square miles for a few billion, it’s worth it. The island looks like a wasteland now, but we can all see him rebranding the southwestern coast “Greenland’s Riviera” and building a golf course and casino.

What do you think: is buying Greenland a crazy idea or one worth considering?

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  1. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Hang On (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    There was one much later, officially. As in during the Reagan Administration.

    Google says it’s the Northern Marianas. Who knew?

    If you go back here and look very carefully, your question will be answered.

    • #91
  2. Seawriter Contributor
    Seawriter
    @Seawriter

    Hang On (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    There was one much later, officially. As in during the Reagan Administration.

    Google says it’s the Northern Marianas. Who knew?

    Well, except for Guam, which was already ours. Even more impressive? They voted to join us. So far, they have not applied for statehood.

    • #92
  3. Hang On Member
    Hang On
    @HangOn

    Seawriter (View Comment):

    Hang On (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    There was one much later, officially. As in during the Reagan Administration.

    Google says it’s the Northern Marianas. Who knew?

    Well, except for Guam, which was already ours. Even more impressive? They voted to join us. So far, they have not applied for statehood.

    In the same article, it said that the Northern Marianas had applied to become part of Guam, but Guam said no. Too many massage parlors and too much corruption.

     

    • #93
  4. Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo… Coolidge
    Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo…
    @GumbyMark

    We must not pay the Danegeld!  I hear you can’t get rid of them afterwards.

    • #94
  5. SkipSul Inactive
    SkipSul
    @skipsul

    Would it be insulting to refer to the residents of any prospective Greenland territory as “Greenbacks”?

    • #95
  6. Hartmann von Aue Member
    Hartmann von Aue
    @HartmannvonAue

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Wholly Cow!

    Auðumbla?

    Ask and Embla send their regards.

    • #96
  7. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    SkipSul (View Comment):

    Would it be insulting to refer to the residents of any prospective Greenland territory as “Greenbacks”?

    Only if they know the history.

    • #97
  8. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    They’re clearly trying to drive up the price.

    https://twitter.com/GreenlandMFA/status/1162330521155887105

    • #98
  9. SkipSul Inactive
    SkipSul
    @skipsul

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    They’re clearly trying to drive up the price.

    https://twitter.com/GreenlandMFA/status/1162330521155887105

    some of the comebacks are hilarious:

    • #99
  10. Midget Faded Rattlesnake Member
    Midget Faded Rattlesnake
    @Midge

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    If memory serves, the Great Lakes is one of the largest bodies of fresh water in the world. We would also have one of the largest “solid” bodies of water (a.k.a. “ice”) in the world.

    The volume of the Greenland Ice Sheet is about 125 times larger than the volume of the Great Lakes. Definitely a Strategic Ice Reserve.

    Wholly Cow!

    Wholly cow, or partly fish and auk?

    • #100
  11. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    Wholly cow, or partly fish and auk?

    The auks are dead.

    • #101
  12. Midget Faded Rattlesnake Member
    Midget Faded Rattlesnake
    @Midge

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    Wholly cow, or partly fish and auk?

    The auks are dead.

    As of 2017, little auks still returned in great numbers to Thule in Greenland to breed, 80% of the total little auk population.

    They do ferment dead auk, though. Yum!

    • #102
  13. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    Wholly cow, or partly fish and auk?

    The auks are dead.

    As of 2017, little auks still returned in great numbers to Thule in Greenland to breed, 80% of the total little auk population.

    They do ferment dead auk, though. Yum!

    You call those auks? We need to make auks great again.

    • #103
  14. James Gawron Inactive
    James Gawron
    @JamesGawron

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    Strategic Ice Reserve

    I am now putting together a consortium interested in investing in the Strategic Ice Reserve. We have retained legal counsel that is noted for his ability to handle the press and has vast experience in cold climates.

    Regards,

    Jim

    • #104
  15. Midget Faded Rattlesnake Member
    Midget Faded Rattlesnake
    @Midge

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    Wholly cow, or partly fish and auk?

    The auks are dead.

    As of 2017, little auks still returned in great numbers to Thule in Greenland to breed, 80% of the total little auk population.

    They do ferment dead auk, though. Yum!

    You call those auks? We need to make auks great again.

    Foodies go nuts over fermented foods these days. Trust me, with the right marketing campaign, even little auks can be great again!

    A twee name helps entice the hipsters. “So Aukward!” perhaps?

    • #105
  16. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):

    Foodies go nuts over fermented foods these days. Trust me, with the right marketing campaign, even little auks can be great again!

    A twee name helps entice the hipsters. “So Aukward!” perhaps?

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_auk

    • #106
  17. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Go big or go home.

    • #107
  18. Midget Faded Rattlesnake Member
    Midget Faded Rattlesnake
    @Midge

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):

    Foodies go nuts over fermented foods these days. Trust me, with the right marketing campaign, even little auks can be great again!

    A twee name helps entice the hipsters. “So Aukward!” perhaps?

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_auk

    So, Jurassic-park-style genetic engineering, to Make Auks Great Again? I could see Trump backing that.

    • #108
  19. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    So, Jurassic-park-style genetic engineering, to Make Auks Great Again? I could see Trump backing that.

    Exactly.

    • #109
  20. Jeff Hawkins Inactive
    Jeff Hawkins
    @JeffHawkins

    China has large mining projects in Greenland that’s helping its tech sector

    It’s also the gateway to Arctic oil, so it’s important to China and Russia.

    This would not be the worst move to buy it and expel the Chinese mining interests, many of which are partnered with Canadian companies

    • #110
  21. Fake John/Jane Galt Coolidge
    Fake John/Jane Galt
    @FakeJohnJaneGalt

    Jeff Hawkins (View Comment):

    China has large mining projects in Greenland that’s helping its tech sector

    It’s also the gateway to Arctic oil, so it’s important to China and Russia.

    This would not be the worst move to buy it and expel the Chinese mining interests, many of which are partnered with Canadian companies

    That explains Trumps interest.  Leverage on China.

    • #111
  22. RyanFalcone Member
    RyanFalcone
    @RyanFalcone

    Buy it and then tell all the “greens” to go there and give them free reign to do whatever they want and prove to the rest of us that their pie in the sky ideals can work in the real world. Tell them that they have 50 years to prove themselves. After that, they all have to renounce citizenship and move out and make way for real Americans to go there and settle it for civilized people.

    • #112
  23. Skyler Coolidge
    Skyler
    @Skyler

    Jeff Hawkins (View Comment):

    China has large mining projects in Greenland that’s helping its tech sector

    It’s also the gateway to Arctic oil, so it’s important to China and Russia.

    This would not be the worst move to buy it and expel the Chinese mining interests, many of which are partnered with Canadian companies

    But our Constitution forbids interfering with private contracts.  What legal process would we use to exclude a nation we are not at war with from a business venture?

    • #113
  24. Jeff Hawkins Inactive
    Jeff Hawkins
    @JeffHawkins

    Skyler (View Comment):

    But our Constitution forbids interfering with private contracts. What legal process would we use to exclude a nation we are not at war with from a business venture?

    isn’t that states and not federal?

    • #114
  25. Randy Webster Inactive
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    Zafar (View Comment):

    Buy them all, because: why not?

    We seem to be broke.

    • #115
  26. Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo… Coolidge
    Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo…
    @GumbyMark

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Zafar (View Comment):

    Buy them all, because: why not?

    We seem to be broke.

    Fortunately the guy in charge knows you can’t be broke as long as someone will loan you the money. 

    • #116
  27. Randy Webster Inactive
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    Hang On (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    There was one much later, officially. As in during the Reagan Administration.

    Google says it’s the Northern Marianas. Who knew?

    What?  Saipan?

    • #117
  28. Seawriter Contributor
    Seawriter
    @Seawriter

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    What? Saipan?

    Along with Rota, Tinian, and largely uninhabited Farallon de Medinilla, Anatahan, Sariguan, Gudgeon, Alamagan, Pagan, Agrihan, Asuncion, Maug Islands, and Farallon de Pajaro

    • #118
  29. Randy Webster Inactive
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    Gumby Mark (R-Meth Lab of Demo… (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Zafar (View Comment):

    Buy them all, because: why not?

    We seem to be broke.

    Fortunately the guy in charge knows you can’t be broke as long as someone will loan you the money.

    I guess printing presses help too.

    • #119
  30. JimGoneWild Coolidge
    JimGoneWild
    @JimGoneWild

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    If memory serves, the Great Lakes is one of the largest bodies of fresh water in the world. We would also have one of the largest “solid” bodies of water (a.k.a. “ice”) in the world.

    The volume of the Greenland Ice Sheet is about 125 times larger than the volume of the Great Lakes. Definitely a Strategic Ice Reserve.

    Wholly Cow!

    Now I can get a nice piece of ice for my Buffalo Trace.

    • #120
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