Contributor Post Created with Sketch. Recommended by Ricochet Members Created with Sketch. Quote of the Day: What I Tell You Three Times Is True

 

“Just the place for a Snark!” the Bellman cried,
As he landed his crew with care;
Supporting each man on the top of the tide
By a finger entwined in his hair.

“Just the place for a Snark! I have said it twice:
That alone should encourage the crew.
Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:
What I tell you three times is true.” — Lewis Carroll, The Hunting of the Snark

My middle son is getting married today.

For the third time.

To the same woman.

All within a year.

Seriously. Pipeliner and Viet Girl are getting married to each other for the third time this year. The first ceremony was in Viet Girl’s home country of Vietnam. It was an engagement ceremony, which in Vietnam is equivalent to a marriage. It was done there so all of her Vietnamese relatives could attend. The second one was a civil ceremony in the United States, shortly after she arrived here on a fiancée visa.

US immigration law calls for anyone entering on a fiancée visa to marry the intended spouse named in the visa within 90 days of arrival. If not, the immigrant must leave the United States and is not allowed to return. Ever. This is to prevent people from using fiancée visas as a “Get in the US Free” card. And you get interviewed before being granted the visa to ensure the couple know each other and it is not a marriage of convenience.

So, the went ahead and got married in the eyes of the law as soon as they could.

This is the church wedding, where they get married in the eyes of God. The definitive one as far as they concerned. The relatives are coming, on both sides of the family. (Viet Girl has two sisters in the US — one in the Dallas-Fort Worth area, and one in the Houston area. My mother, in her late 80s is coming (escorted by a granddaughter who lives in the same town).

And, as far as all of us are concerned, the third time will be the charm. Certainly, after the two of them go through a marriage ceremony for the third time they will be so thoroughly married they must inevitably believe what they were told three times is true.

There are 18 comments.

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  1. She Reagan
    SheJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    All the best, and prayers and hopes for many happy years ahead for the lovely and loving couple. And that’s no snark.

    • #1
    • July 27, 2019, at 6:50 AM PDT
    • 5 likes
  2. Seawriter Contributor
    Seawriter

    She (View Comment):

    All the best, and prayers and hopes for many happy years ahead for the lovely and loving couple. And that’s no snark.

    To anyone who does snark: 

    Remember that some snarks are boojums.

    . . . beware of the day,
    If your Snark be a Boojum! For then
    You will softly and suddenly vanish away,
    And never be met with again!’

    • #2
    • July 27, 2019, at 6:54 AM PDT
    • 6 likes
  3. The Reticulator Member

    I’ve never known a passage from Lewis Carroll to be recited during a church wedding, but maybe it’s not too late for a first time! Best wishes, regardless.

    • #3
    • July 27, 2019, at 7:07 AM PDT
    • 8 likes
  4. The Great Adventure! Inactive
    The Great Adventure!Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Congrats to the blessed couple and to the parents!

    • #4
    • July 27, 2019, at 7:23 AM PDT
    • 6 likes
  5. Doug Watt Moderator

    Congratulations to your son, his wife, and to you.

    • #5
    • July 27, 2019, at 8:09 AM PDT
    • 3 likes
  6. Kay of MT Member

    Have to admit that sure beats my “hippy” marriage. Congratulation to all and best of everything for them.

    • #6
    • July 27, 2019, at 9:32 AM PDT
    • 5 likes
  7. Al French of Damascus Moderator

    Congratulations, and welcome to Vietnamese-American life.

    I married my Vietnamese wife in 1973. At the time she was living in San Diego. The ongoing war and the expense of air travel in those days made it very impractical to go there. So we had our engagement ceremony in San Diego with her friends and one cousin living nearby. Later jewelry were married by a minister in Portland. So only two “weddings” for me.

    • #7
    • July 27, 2019, at 10:24 AM PDT
    • 9 likes
  8. SkipSul Coolidge
    SkipSulJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    That’s wonderful! And a great story too.

    • #8
    • July 27, 2019, at 11:28 AM PDT
    • 6 likes
  9. Arahant Member

    Tell them if they ever think about divorce, they’ll have to do it three times, and it’s just not worth the work.

    • #9
    • July 27, 2019, at 12:36 PM PDT
    • 7 likes
  10. TBA Coolidge

    Mazel Tov! 

    • #10
    • July 27, 2019, at 2:23 PM PDT
    • 1 like
  11. Arahant Member

    TBA (View Comment):

    Mazel Tov!

    Yes, definitely congratulations to them.

    Or as my father said to my wife when we were married, “No deposit. No return.” May it be many years of blessings.

    • #11
    • July 27, 2019, at 2:49 PM PDT
    • 6 likes
  12. Front Seat Cat Member

    Boy – this marriage better stick! It has everything in its favor! Congratulations to the whole family!

    • #12
    • July 27, 2019, at 3:51 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  13. TreeRat Member

    Seawriter (View Comment):

    She (View Comment):

    All the best, and prayers and hopes for many happy years ahead for the lovely and loving couple. And that’s no snark.

    To anyone who does snark:

    Remember that some snarks are boojums.

    . . . beware of the day,
    If your Snark be a Boojum! For then
    You will softly and suddenly vanish away,
    And never be met with again!’

    Kinda like getting banished from ricochet for improper or offensive comments, eh?

    But snarkiness is a way of life! I’ll just have to take my chances.

    • #13
    • July 27, 2019, at 4:02 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  14. Basil Fawlty Member
    Basil FawltyJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Seawriter: It was an engagement ceremony, which in Vietnam is equivalent to a marriage.

    But not recognized as such by the US?

    • #14
    • July 27, 2019, at 4:04 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  15. Seawriter Contributor
    Seawriter

    Basil Fawlty (View Comment):

    Seawriter: It was an engagement ceremony, which in Vietnam is equivalent to a marriage.

    But not recognized as such by the US?

    Not even by the Vietnamese government. It was a Christian ceremony, and Vietnam is officially Communist. It was under the radar. Additionally, Viet Girl was coming in on a fiancee visa, not a marriage visa. Getting married officially would have delayed her entry, potentially for years. (The US now works very hard to prevent phony marriages as means of entry into the US. If they didn’t, strange things could happen. Maybe a couple of siblings getting married with one of them getting elected to the House of Representatives. I know – that’s crazy talk.)

    Technically, the betrothal is the first half of an Orthodox Christian wedding. Originally they were held on different days, but over the years were combined. So what they did in Vietnam was only part of a marriage.

    • #15
    • July 27, 2019, at 5:38 PM PDT
    • 5 likes
  16. Basil Fawlty Member
    Basil FawltyJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Seawriter (View Comment):

    Basil Fawlty (View Comment):

    Seawriter: It was an engagement ceremony, which in Vietnam is equivalent to a marriage.

    But not recognized as such by the US?

    Not even by the Vietnamese government. It was a Christian ceremony, and Vietnam is officially Communist. It was under the radar. Additionally, Viet Girl was coming in on a fiancee visa, not a marriage visa. Getting married officially would have delayed her entry, potentially for years. (The US now works very hard to prevent phony marriages as means of entry into the US. If they didn’t, strange things could happen. Maybe a couple of siblings getting married with one of them getting elected to the House of Representatives. I know – that’s crazy talk.)

    Technically, the betrothal is the first half of an Orthodox Christian wedding. Originally they were held on different days, but over the years were combined. So what they did in Vietnam was only part of a marriage.

    Thanks. So there was no marriage under Vietnamese law, but only a betrothal. Thus, the need for the fiancee visa and subsequent marriage in the US.

    • #16
    • July 27, 2019, at 6:03 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  17. Seawriter Contributor
    Seawriter

    Basil Fawlty (View Comment):

    Seawriter (View Comment):

    Basil Fawlty (View Comment):

    Seawriter: It was an engagement ceremony, which in Vietnam is equivalent to a marriage.

    But not recognized as such by the US?

    Not even by the Vietnamese government. It was a Christian ceremony, and Vietnam is officially Communist. It was under the radar. Additionally, Viet Girl was coming in on a fiancee visa, not a marriage visa. Getting married officially would have delayed her entry, potentially for years. (The US now works very hard to prevent phony marriages as means of entry into the US. If they didn’t, strange things could happen. Maybe a couple of siblings getting married with one of them getting elected to the House of Representatives. I know – that’s crazy talk.)

    Technically, the betrothal is the first half of an Orthodox Christian wedding. Originally they were held on different days, but over the years were combined. So what they did in Vietnam was only part of a marriage.

    Thanks. So there was no marriage under Vietnamese law, but only a betrothal. Thus, the need for the fiancee visa and subsequent marriage in the US.

    Correct.

    • #17
    • July 27, 2019, at 6:09 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  18. RushBabe49 Thatcher

    Hearty congratulations to the happy couple, and to you, proud Papa.

    • #18
    • July 27, 2019, at 6:54 PM PDT
    • 2 likes

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