Contributor Post Created with Sketch. Unmarried Motherhood (and Fatherhood) Stats – WTF! Edition

 

The Washington Post had this today:

Overall, 36 percent of all births in the United States were to unmarried mothers in 2011, the year that the census analyzed from answers provided in the American Community Survey…

The census also found that Asian mothers were the least likely to be unmarried, with just 11 percent of new Asian mothers being single. White single mothers also were below the national average, at 29 percent. Among Hispanics, 43 percent of all new mothers were unmarried, as were 68 percent of all African American women who had recently given birth.

The Census Bureau attributed the long-term increase in single mothers in large part to changing norms for sexual behavior and a decrease in marriage rates.

You know that old thing where fathers used to help raise the children they made? So retro! (Unless you’re Asian.)

The wife is now known, simply, as “the baby mama.” The fatherly responsibility of bringing home the bacon has now been supplanted by the much more fleeting task of wham bam thank you ma’am.

Sorry, I’m venting here. But please, people, don’t inflict your selfish behavior on innocent children.

When I think of all those little kids out there who don’t know their own fathers, I start thinking like a liberal and want flood the world with government-subsidized condoms. Yeah, and maybe a genuine government agent standing by in every bedroom to ensure that it gets put on properly. There could be a whole new branch of government called the Sexual Security Administration.

Is marriage on life support in this country or what?

There are 36 comments.

  1. Profile Photo Member

    The instituion of Marriage needs a shock from a defibulator.

    • #1
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:05 AM PDT
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  2. Barkha Herman Member

    People, like children, respond to what is being rewarded. And, if you are a low income woman, you are paid by the government to have kids out of wedlock. If you are a high earning woman, you are penalized by paying higher taxes as married couple than you would pay individually.

    So, I am not surprised.

    On the flip side, we should be glad we have kids at all. In countries in western Europe, the government can’t pay people enough to have babies…

    • #2
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:18 AM PDT
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  3. Frozen Chosen Inactive

    Our country simply cannot survive the destruction of marriage. We are already feeling the devastating effects of the statistics you cite.

    • #3
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:24 AM PDT
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  4. captainpower Inactive
    Barkha Herman: On the flip side, we should be glad we have kids at all. In countries in western Europe, the government can’t pay people enough to have babies… · 0 minutes ago

    A commenter from the singapore a while back pointed out that the authoritarian government in Singapore did much to discourage large families a few years back. Turns out they are below replacement rate, so time to encourage large families. It’s not working. Whoops.

    • #4
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:25 AM PDT
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  5. Barkha Herman Member
    captainpower
    Barkha Herman: On the flip side, we should be glad we have kids at all. In countries in western Europe, the government can’t pay people enough to have babies… · 0 minutes ago

    A commenter from the singapore a while back pointed out that the authoritarian government in Singapore did much to discourage large families a few years back. Turns out they are below replacement rate, so time to encourage large families. It’s not working. Whoops. · 0 minutes ago

    Not to worry, us Asians are making enough babies for the entire plant. If only we could get them to vote Republican.

    • #5
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:29 AM PDT
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  6. J Climacus Member

    Nathan, you aren’t thinking like a liberal if you still think children need fathers (or mothers, for that matter). When you realize even thinking such thoughts is an insult to same-sex marriage equality, then you’ll finally start to think like a liberal.

    • #6
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:36 AM PDT
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  7. Douglas Inactive

    Marriage is on life support because moral standards and civilization are on life support.

    • #7
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:37 AM PDT
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  8. Brian Clendinen Member
    Brian Clendinen Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

     

    When people say their is a gap and class difference in their country I agree, just not on what the gap is. It is between children from two parent families and thous that grow up in single mother families of wedlock.

    The interesting part is I looked at % of wedlock births by state. Utah has the lowest, it also has the lowest divorce rate and has one of the highest birth rates. So when I look at demographics that matter, Utah is the state of hope.

    Not that I plan on moving there ever. I will try to reform the culture in my state of Florida first.

    • #8
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:37 AM PDT
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  9. Mike H Coolidge

    Still… it’s debatable that even crappy existence, especially in America, is better than no existence.

    Doesn’t excuse the fathers (or mothers) though.

    • #9
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:55 AM PDT
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  10. Ansonia Member
    Ansonia Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Weren’t out of wedlock births for Hispanics once higher?

    • #10
    • May 2, 2013, at 1:57 AM PDT
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  11. Spin Coolidge
    Spin Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Don’t you mean “WT[expletive]! Edition”?

    • #11
    • May 2, 2013, at 2:00 AM PDT
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  12. Adriana Harris Member

    Many of these problems have developed because of government programs that reduce personal responsibility. If you’re a single mom you get money for the kid, money for housing, money for food…etc., as long as there is no man in the house. Instead, I think the government should go after the fathers for these financial responsibilities and the mothers should be made to depend on their own families before they turn to the government. Then there would be more people interested in making sure children aren’t born out of wedlock. 

    • #12
    • May 2, 2013, at 2:32 AM PDT
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  13. Foxfier Inactive
    Ansonia: Weren’t out of wedlock births for Hispanics once higher? · 18 minutes ago

    Table 16.

    Two aspects to that–recent redefinition of who is what (Portuguese are now ‘Latino’ instead of ‘White’–not sure who else got modified) and lower rates of illegals.

    (At least in Washington, even married illegals will say they’re not, because it makes it easier to skip on the bill. That could be an effect of crazy state medical laws, though.)

    • #13
    • May 2, 2013, at 3:00 AM PDT
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  14. Foxfier Inactive
    Adriana Harris: Many of these problems have developed because of government programs that reduce personal responsibility. If you’re a single mom you get money for the kid, money for housing, money for food…etc., as long as there is no man in the house. 

    Not sure about other states, but in Oregon at least it only matters if you’re married. My sister was turned away from a lot of programs because she actually got married before having her son. (Married poorly, but I digress.)

    Now, with only half custody, she is eligible for a lot more programs– so is her ex, and he’s already gone through at least one more live-in without hurting his ability to milk the system.

    If you’re willing to lie, you can get even more. Having a job gets in the way of making it to the appointments for the freebies, though.

    • #14
    • May 2, 2013, at 3:14 AM PDT
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  15. Fake John/Jane Galt Coolidge
    I have seen a trend lately among my friends of older women having children. These women seldom have steady relationships and mainly have seen men as something to do on a Friday night. With their biological clock running down they all of sudden end up pregnant. They either do not tell the father or when the father offers to step up, tells them they are not interested. They have all said some form of “It’s MY baby, I want nobody else to have rights to it”. On the birth certificate they list the father as unknown. They have lived a life mostly without men, they have constantly been told they do not need men and men can not be trusted. Is it any wonder they do not want men except as an occasional play toy?
    • #15
    • May 2, 2013, at 4:05 AM PDT
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  16. Paul J. Croeber Inactive

    Casting marriage as an antiquated institution isn’t a shield from the consequences of doing so.

    • #16
    • May 2, 2013, at 4:24 AM PDT
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  17. Hammer, The Member

    I used to think that the term “baby mama” was used embarrassingly… my clients use that phrase with regularity, but I am more dismayed by the manner in which they use it. Not even a hint of embarrassment or shame; it is as common and acceptable as would be “my girlfriend,” or “my wife.” It make me cringe every time I hear it.

    • #17
    • May 2, 2013, at 4:44 AM PDT
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  18. Hammer, The Member
    Foxfier

    If you’re willing to lie, you can get even more. Having a job gets in the way of making it to the appointments for the freebies, though. · 1 hour ago

    The frequency with which I see these things makes my head spin… 

    But here is a funny variation on the “government money scam” that is run by, well, virtually everyone on welfare:

    (please pardon if you heard this the first time I told the story)

    Judge: “will you be hiring your own attorney?

    defendant: “I can’t afford one.”

    Judge: “what do you do for a living?”

    D: “I babysit my kids”

    J: “you mean you are a stay at home mom?”

    D: “no, I don’t have custody…”

    Long story short (without relaying the whole conversation), CPS terminated parental rights on this lady and granted custody to a relative. The state pays that relative for child-care, and she gives that money to Mom, to “babysit” her own kids.

    Well done, state of Washington. Well done.

    Ask, sometimes, for the anecdotes of other welfare recipients…

    • #18
    • May 2, 2013, at 4:50 AM PDT
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  19. JeanVianney Inactive

    Somehow those who disdain marriage prior to having children are living in an “alternative universe” in which life is about “doing what I want”. God’s Word and the invisible, real love is unknown, as are their family members real needs. What counts? Whatever gains their attention at the moment, the latest fad, the latest news on the MSM, fearing to “impose judgment” on anyone’s immoral behavior, (unless it violates the current moral norms of the political correctness). Their appearance matters a great deal. They like Obama, and all his sensational lifestyle. What kind of a shock will they have on Judgment Day? I fear to say.

    • #19
    • May 2, 2013, at 5:34 AM PDT
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  20. RushBabe49 Thatcher

    Here is what killed it:

    “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle”. All else stems from that one sentiment.

    • #20
    • May 2, 2013, at 5:36 AM PDT
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  21. kgrant67 Inactive

    This is not to undermine your point at all because it is totally valid and correct. I am curious though about what percent of those single mom’s are cohabitating with the father. In a monogomous committed relationship with the father, but not ‘married’. My guess from empirical observation is that though not high, it is higher among whites than blacks, making the effective disparity even greater.

    • #21
    • May 2, 2013, at 5:40 AM PDT
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  22. Joan of Ark La Tex Member

    Do most people believe in the concept of sanctity anymore?

    The sanctity of marriage, of chastity, of parenthood. When the spiritual dimension is removed, the foundation for morality collapses. 

    Denise Prager once said if we discard all of Judeo-Christian doctrines, then what is good and evil? It would be indefinable, like pretty and ugly. 

    When we abort babies and say it isn’t murder, on what basis do we build the right for a human life to exist? 

    When we glamorous nudity, how can we not expect sexual experimentation among teenagers? 

    When a child is nothing more than a growth of cells of a woman, how can it justify unconditional love? 

    All freedom comes with a price. 

    • #22
    • May 2, 2013, at 6:43 AM PDT
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  23. Brian Clendinen Member
    Brian Clendinen Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member
    Dr. J: As a Family Physician working in rural Iowa, I have witnessed first hand the destruction of the family and the devastation of single parenthood and fatherless children. Over the past 18 years the situation has gone from and occasional difficult situation to a 3 times a day heartache. I ache for the children that I deliver and care for as I see them going into the care of all of the things that the left wants to pass off as “family”. Medicaid, WIC, welfare and Aid for Dependent children make a terrible father. God’s moral law is invisible and the results of ignoring it are some years in the making, but the effect is just as disastrous as ignoring the law of gravity. · 11 hours ago

     

    On a side note, do you deal with infertility a lot? The reason I ask is I have heard one or two OB-GYN’s say they say antidotaly, it appears STD’s have lead to a huge increase in infertility. I am interested if you seem to see the same thing?

    • #23
    • May 2, 2013, at 7:04 AM PDT
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  24. Brian Clendinen Member
    Brian Clendinen Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member
    Ryan M: I used to think that the term “baby mama” was used embarrassingly… my clients use that phrase with regularity, but I am more dismayed by the manner in which they use it. Not even a hint of embarrassment or shame; it is as common and acceptable as would be “my girlfriend,” or “my wife.” It make me cringe every time I hear it. · 14 hours ago

     

    Yay, it really makes me wish for the days were birthing a basterd was considered shameful. Shame is very important in cultures for enforcing significant moral norms. When you remove all shame and almost take away financial suffering, you will have more people engaging in the destructive act. The success of the culture of basterhood has made a curse word into a badge of honor for those who give birth to them.

    • #24
    • May 2, 2013, at 7:21 AM PDT
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  25. Dr. J Inactive

    As a Family Physician working in rural Iowa, I have witnessed first hand the destruction of the family and the devastation of single parenthood and fatherless children. Over the past 18 years the situation has gone from and occasional difficult situation to a 3 times a day heartache. I ache for the children that I deliver and care for as I see them going into the care of all of the things that the left wants to pass off as “family”. Medicaid, WIC, welfare and Aid for Dependent children make a terrible father. God’s moral law is invisible and the results of ignoring it are some years in the making, but the effect is just as disastrous as ignoring the law of gravity.

    • #25
    • May 2, 2013, at 7:49 AM PDT
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  26. Astonishing Inactive
    RushBabe49: Here is what killed it:

    “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle”. All else stems from that one sentiment.

    Yes, exactly, but I would add:

    That sentiment would have remained a rarely-tried theory were it not for The Pill, which gave feminists a few decades to popularize the idea in the real world. The Pill changed everything. Women’s liberation–so called–would have been impossible without birth control. And women’s liberation (does anyone still call it that?) liberated men from civilized responsibilities of fatherhood.

    • #26
    • May 2, 2013, at 8:26 AM PDT
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  27. Dr. J Inactive
    Brian Clendinen

    On a side note, do you deal with infertility a lot? The reason I ask is I have heard one or two GBYN’s say they say antidotaly, it appears STD’s have lead to a huge increase in infertility. I am interested if you seem to see the same thing? · 2 hours ago

    Brian, The short answer is yes, STD’s lead to scaring of the reproductive organs and infertility. I don’t see a lot of that in my practice but it is definitely a major problem for women who have had infections and then later wish to conceive.

    • #27
    • May 2, 2013, at 9:47 AM PDT
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  28. Ansonia Member
    Ansonia Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member
    Re : Brian Clendinen at comment # 26Brian, I’d appreciate it if you’d write about “illegitimate parenthood” or “unwed parenthood” instead of “bastard hood” or “basterhood”, since children–my virtuous, hard working, well educated daughter, for example–have no control over the circumstances of their conception.Thanks so much,Ansonia
    • #28
    • May 3, 2013, at 1:41 AM PDT
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  29. Joseph Stanko Member
    Joseph Stanko Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member
    Ryan M: I used to think that the term “baby mama” was used embarrassingly… my clients use that phrase with regularity, but I am more dismayed by the manner in which they use it. Not even a hint of embarrassment or shame; it is as common and acceptable as would be “my girlfriend,” or “my wife.” It make me cringe every time I hear it. · 21 hours ago

    Same here, if not embarrassment at the very least I though it would have a somewhat ironic “air quotes” slangy quality to it.

    Then I recently overheard two teenage fast-food employees chatting, and one said “my cousin’s baby mama told my sister that…” As if it were the most natural thing in the world, doesn’t everyone have a cousin with a baby mama? Just another Webster’s English word to describe a normal relationship.

    • #29
    • May 3, 2013, at 2:08 AM PDT
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  30. Joseph Stanko Member
    Joseph Stanko Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    P.S. How long until expert consultants start telling us the GOP isn’t attracting enough voters from the baby mama demographic? We need to stop being so judgmental of baby mamas, we need to repackage our policies to appeal more to the concerns of baby mamas, etc.

    • #30
    • May 3, 2013, at 2:11 AM PDT
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