Transgressive Jokes and Western Civilization

 

The day that the Challenger blew up, I was sitting in a lounge area adjacent to the cafeteria with some friends when another friend came up.

He said in an obviously joking tone, “Hey, do you know what NASA stands for?”

I bit, “No, what does it stand for?”

“Need Another Seven Astronauts?”

Talk about going from disaster to humor in nothing flat, he had it down to a few hours. These days, I’m sure he would have followed up with, “Too soon?” Of course, that joke had probably been a variant of one from Apollo 1, where it might have been, “Need Another Set of Astronauts,” so the speed came through recycling.

When the subject of the Challenger explosion came up recently, I thought about that moment. If someone today, especially a university student, cracked a tasteless joke like that on the day of a disaster, the authorities would lock him up, clear the building, and provide psychological counseling for all who had been triggered by his obtuseness towards the feelings of the snowflakes around him.

Back at that time, I had a job at the university, and my boss’ boss was a black man with an Irish last name. One day, he announced he had gotten an invitation to attend the World (his surname) Gathering in Ireland.

“Can you see me strutting in there?” he asked while acting out the strut. He imagined he would say, “‘Hi! I’m just here to add a little color to the gathering!’”

Then he looked over at me, “Hey, Charley! You know why white men dress as they do on the golf course?”

“No, Doc, why do they?”

He waved at his outfit, which included bright colors and plaid pants, “So they can dress as cool as black men do every day.”

Can you imagine anyone doing that today? Yes, the target of the humor might be construed as white men, or the target might be seen as black fashion choices.

I grew up with all sorts of transgressive jokes. We learned to laugh. We learned to have humor in horrible situations.

Q. What is Al Qaeda’s favorite football team?

A. The New York Jets.

We were not brittle. Like iron, we were worked hard with a bit of carbon (or manure) thrown our way to make us tough and flexible steel.

Some of that manure thrown our way was in the form of ethnic jokes:

Q. How does a Polack tie his shoe?

A. *The guy puts one foot up on a chair and bends down to tie the shoe on the other foot, which is on the ground.*

Q: How can you tell if a WASP is sexually excited?

A: The stiff upper lip.

Q. How can you tell when a Scotsman is dead?

A. He lets go of his wallet.

We learned to tell dirty jokes without being offended or offensive:

Q. What’s black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, and green?

A. Four nuns fighting over a pickle.

In many ways, these jokes which would be considered offensive today were the glue that held us together. They were the hammers we were forged with. They were the naughty coals that warmed our hearts. These jokes were the building bricks of a cohesive civilization.

Sure, they could be sick and cruel or even gross:

Q. What’s red and white and hangs from the ceiling?

A. A baby on a meat hook.

Q. What’s green and hangs from the ceiling?

A. Same baby three weeks later.

Or they might make fun of people with disabilities:

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs when he’s on your porch?

A. Matt.

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs when he’s in the ocean?

A. Bob.

Hey, did you hear about the hockey game at the leper colony? There was a face off in the corner.

And they certainly made fun of professions:

Q. What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?

A. Your Honor.

Q. What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

A. Senator.

Q. What’s the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

A. Accountants know they’re boring.

Q. How do you know you’re talking to an extroverted actuary?

A. He looks at your shoes when he talks.

The only way for us to preserve Western Civilization is to get back to joking without worrying about who might be offended. So, give us your best. Disaster jokes? Go for it! Nun jokes? Dead baby jokes? Mommy, mommy jokes? Leper jokes? Quadruple-amputee jokes? Rude limericks? Bring ’em on.

Just remember that we still have a CoC on Ricochet, so clean up your language, you etaoin shrdlus.

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  1. Michael Brehm Lincoln
    Michael Brehm
    @MichaelBrehm

    Judge Mental (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Whatta ya call a man with no arms and no legs nailed to the wall?

    Art.

    In a Pile of leaves?

    Russel.

    Behind a waterski boat?

    Skipper.

    In your mailbox?

    Bill

    In a hole?

    Phil.

    Next to a hole?

    Doug.

     

    What do you call a dog with no legs?

    It doesn’t matter, he’s not going to come anyway.

    Who is that girl whose one leg is shorter than the other?

    Eileen

    • #31
  2. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    Does anybody know how you can tell the difference between an epileptic corn-husker and a prostitute with cholera?

    No, how do you tell?

    • #32
  3. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    Who is that girl whose one leg is shorter than the other?

    Eileen

    What if she’s Japanese?

    Irene.

    • #33
  4. Ed G. Member
    Ed G.
    @EdG

    Arahant: In many ways, these jokes which would be considered offensive today were the glue that held us together. They were the hammers we were forged with. They were the naughty coals that warmed our hearts. These jokes were the building bricks of a cohesive civilization.

    To get serious for just a moment: it used to be that progress was a melting pot. Now, progress is the Jets and Sharks eternally at war, for there can be no mixing as appropriation is evil. No, the peas must never touch the mashed potatoes which should be kept far away from the meat loaf – and don’t even think about adding curry to any of these American foods you imperialist bigot! We’re either supposed to encase existing cultures in amber to die off from stagnation as museum pieces or we’re supposed to battle each other for dominance first (except white people who should just roll over and die apparently) and then encase the winners and losers in amber to die off in the museum of Western Civ.

    • #34
  5. Ed G. Member
    Ed G.
    @EdG

    You know, thinking about this more it occurs to me that all this seems to be, has been, and probably will ever be the domain of male humor. Do chicks, er I mean women, join in on this type of humor? Few examples I can think of.

    • #35
  6. Michael Brehm Lincoln
    Michael Brehm
    @MichaelBrehm

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    Does anybody know how you can tell the difference between an epileptic corn-husker and a prostitute with cholera?

    No, how do you tell?

    Well Arahant, I know that you can tell an epileptic corn-husker because they shuck between fits, but I forgot the rest. I’m terrible with punchlines…

    • #36
  7. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):
    Well Arahant, I know that you can tell an epileptic corn-husker because they shuck between fits, but I forgot the rest. I’m terrible with punchlines…

    Got it.

    • #37
  8. James Lileks Contributor
    James Lileks
    @jameslileks

    There’s a difference between the “too soon” type jokes that make light of a horrible recent event, and dead-baby / HK jokes, right? On 9.12.01 a co-worker made a joke about the previous day and I didn’t speak to him for 15 years. It was so, so wrong to do that.

    • #38
  9. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    James Lileks (View Comment):
    There’s a difference between the “too soon” type jokes that make light of a horrible recent event, and dead-baby / HK jokes, right?

    Yes, there is. Both tasteless, but one certainly shows less grace.

    • #39
  10. Ed G. Member
    Ed G.
    @EdG

    James Lileks (View Comment):

    There’s a difference between the “too soon” type jokes that make light of a horrible recent event, and dead-baby / HK jokes, right? On 9.12.01 a co-worker made a joke about the previous day and I didn’t speak to him for 15 years. It was so, so wrong to do that.

    I get it, but things like not speaking for 15 years, refusing admission to college, or not hiring all seem like drastic reactions to me. And for what? Not actions, not eternal declarations, but poor taste. Ok I guess.

    • #40
  11. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    James Lileks (View Comment):

    There’s a difference between the “too soon” type jokes that make light of a horrible recent event, and dead-baby / HK jokes, right? On 9.12.01 a co-worker made a joke about the previous day and I didn’t speak to him for 15 years. It was so, so wrong to do that.

    Interesting.

    To this day I can’t recall ever hearing *any* 9/11 jokes, unless I’ve blocked them out.   The one thing that comes closest is the photoshop of the guy on the observation deck of the tower with the plane coming in behind, but that wasn’t really a “joke” (although all of the take-offs on it, with Godzilla, or the sta-puff marshmallow man, etc in the background certainly were).

    I can remember a bunch of Jeffrey Dahmer jokes  (“Be careful moving that refrigerator – if you drop it, heads will roll”), and we went through a bunch of Challenger jokes in the PIT (“No, I said Bud Light”).

    But not a single 9/11 joke comes to mind.

     

    • #41
  12. Tex929rr Coolidge
    Tex929rr
    @Tex929rr

    I have never heard a 9/11 joke.

    But… the French killed more Germans in the Concorde crash than in two world wars.

    • #42
  13. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    But not a single 9/11 joke comes to mind.

    I had to search the Internet to find the joke I posted in the OP about Al Qaeda’s favorite football team. There were pages of them. I had never heard any, either.

    • #43
  14. ltpwfdcm allegedly Coolidge
    ltpwfdcm allegedly
    @ltpwfdcm

    What’s the chunkiest part of vegetable soup?

    .

    .

    .

    .

    The Wheelchair

    • #44
  15. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    ltpwfdcm allegedly (View Comment):

    What’s the chunkiest part of vegetable soup?

    The Wheelchair

    Unexpected. Got a great laugh out of me. Thanks.

    • #45
  16. Bishop Wash Member
    Bishop Wash
    @BishopWash

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Whatta ya call a man with no arms and no legs nailed to the wall?

    Art.

    In a Pile of leaves?

    Russel.

    Behind a waterski boat?

    Skipper.

    In your mailbox?

    Bill

    In a hole?

    Phil.

    Next to a hole?

    Doug.

     

    Two homosexuals?

    Neal and Bob

    Floating in the water?

    Bob

    • #46
  17. Bishop Wash Member
    Bishop Wash
    @BishopWash

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    James Lileks (View Comment):

    There’s a difference between the “too soon” type jokes that make light of a horrible recent event, and dead-baby / HK jokes, right? On 9.12.01 a co-worker made a joke about the previous day and I didn’t speak to him for 15 years. It was so, so wrong to do that.

    Interesting.

    But not a single 9/11 joke comes to mind.

     

    Not a joke but I remember the apocryphal story of the American who goes to a bar in Dublin and orders an Irish car bomb. Bartender comes back with two tall shot glasses, lights them on fire, and calls it the twin towers. 

    • #47
  18. ltpwfdcm allegedly Coolidge
    ltpwfdcm allegedly
    @ltpwfdcm

    How many Branch Davidians can you fit in a car?

    2 in front, 3 in back and 81 in the ashtray

    • #48
  19. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    But not a single 9/11 joke comes to mind.

    I had to search the Internet to find the joke I posted in the OP about Al Qaeda’s favorite football team. There were pages of them. I had never heard any, either.

    The wikipedia article on 9/11 jokes references the issue of the Onion that came out a few weeks after that was dedicated to the 9/11 attacks. I remember that issue.  The main headline was “9/11 hijackers surprised to find themselves in Hell”, and there was also an article titled “What part of Thou Shalt Not Kill do you people not understand, angry God asks”.   So not really “9/11 jokes”.

    According to the wiki article, they self-censored one article titled “America Stronger than Ever, Say Quadragon officials”.

    That’s funny now, would not have been at the time.  At all.

     

     

    • #49
  20. Bishop Wash Member
    Bishop Wash
    @BishopWash

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Whatta ya call a man with no arms and no legs nailed to the wall?

    Art.

    In a Pile of leaves?

    Russel.

    Behind a waterski boat?

    Skipper.

    In your mailbox?

    Bill

    In a hole?

    Phil.

    Next to a hole?

    Doug.

     

    On your porch?

    Matt

    • #50
  21. Clavius Thatcher
    Clavius
    @Clavius

    What were Christa McAuliffe’s last words?

    What does this button do?

    • #51
  22. KentForrester Coolidge
    KentForrester
    @KentForrester

    Arahant, you posted something, just like you said you would. 

     I still think it’s your very first post, despite your claim that you’ve made  over 300 of them.

    BTW, I don’t know any tasteless jokes outside of that dead prostitute limerick I included within my poetry post a few days ago. I don’t suppose limericks count, though, since almost all are tasteless. 

    I think you claim too much —“the glue that held us together” — for the proliferation of tasteless jokes in the past.  Tasteless jokes are merely tiny, naughty pimples on the body politic.   I may be minimizing their importance, however, because I don’t know any. 

    Good post, Mr. Weatherford.  I look forward to your second one. 

    • #52
  23. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    KentForrester (View Comment):
    I look forward to your second one.

    Look down the Member Feed, @kentforrester. This was my second today. The other was a sonnet.

     

    • #53
  24. Randy Webster Inactive
    Randy Webster
    @RandyWebster

    From back in the day when the National Lampoon wrote its own letters to the editor:

    Have you seen Ray Charles’s new piano?  No?  That’s OK; neither has he.

    That was cruel, but he’ll never know.

                                                                                       Stevie Wonder

    • #54
  25. thelonious Member
    thelonious
    @thelonious

    Ya all hear about the newest German microwave?

     

     

     

     

    Seats 9 people.

    • #55
  26. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    Ed G. (View Comment):

    You know, thinking about this more it occurs to me that all this seems to be, has been, and probably will ever be the domain of male humor. Do chicks, er I mean women, join in on this type of humor? Few examples I can think of.

    I agree. 

    Dudes rib in order to bond and build trust. It is a kind of masculine love and women mostly don’t play – although becoming ‘one of the guys’ probably requires participation. 

    The loss of this not-so-very-gentle art has left us with a lot of lawsuits and HR complaints. Were there HR departments before women joined the work force? 

     

    • #56
  27. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    TBA (View Comment):
    Were there HR departments before women joined the work force? 

    Women in the work force predated HR departments by thousands of years.

    • #57
  28. Full Size Tabby Member
    Full Size Tabby
    @FullSizeTabby

    TBA (View Comment):

    Dudes rib in order to bond and build trust. It is a kind of masculine love and women mostly don’t play – although becoming ‘one of the guys’ probably requires participation. 

     

    I have had to point this out to a number of women I have worked with – guys insulting each other doesn’t necessarily mean they dislike each other; sometimes it is a sign of affection. Mrs. Tabby also understands it and has needed to explain it to some of her girlfriends.

    • #58
  29. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    But not a single 9/11 joke comes to mind.

    I had to search the Internet to find the joke I posted in the OP about Al Qaeda’s favorite football team. There were pages of them. I had never heard any, either.

    The wikipedia article on 9/11 jokes references the issue of the Onion that came out a few weeks after that was dedicated to the 9/11 attacks. I remember that issue. The main headline was “9/11 hijackers surprised to find themselves in Hell”, and there was also an article titled “What part of Thou Shalt Not Kill do you people not understand, angry God asks”. So not really “9/11 jokes”.

    According to the wiki article, they self-censored one article titled “America Stronger than Ever, Say Quadragon officials”.

    That’s funny now, would not have been at the time. At all.

    I remember that issue. The tried to hard on the jokes and I didn’t care. I needed them to be funny. 

    There was a piece about someone baking a red white and blue cake that really worked for me as it caught the national mood. 

    • #59
  30. Bishop Wash Member
    Bishop Wash
    @BishopWash

    Why do babies have soft spots on their heads?

    So you can carry five at a time in an emergency. 

    • #60
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