Can You Spot the Democratic Candidate?

 

Back in the early 1970s, Camel ran a series of magazine ads featuring arrays of colorful characters, each with an amusing “gimmick.” Each, that is, except for the Camel Filters smoker, who didn’t need a gimmick: he was confident, secure, rugged, good looking, relaxed — and usually had a jacket hooked casually over his shoulder. A key on the page, or occasionally on the reverse page, named the gimmicky characters and described their particular affectations.

I loved those ads when I was a kid. (click picture to enlarge)

I thought of those ads recently while listening to Joe Biden struggling to make himself relevant to an identity-obsessed Democratic party. Biden’s pandering misandry was cringe-inducing, as he groveled for his failure to be something more than a pathetic male while taking part in the attempted Clarence Thomas lynching, and then debased himself (and men in general) in a weird riff about old world wife abuse half a millennium ago, and how it relates to 21st century American sexual relationships. It didn’t make much sense, but this is Joe Biden we’re talking about: his thoughts wander as much as his hands.

Poor Joe. He isn’t gay, or a member of a minority, or a woman, or an ersatz Native American, or a hip skateboarder, or some winning intersection of the above. In a Democratic Party that demands a gimmick, he comes up short, and so he’s having to fall back on self-loathing, claiming for himself a toxic masculinity that, while it might describe his penchant for being “handsy,” still rings hollow.

He could call himself a socialist, but that’s pretty much the universal gimmick for this crowd. And when everyone’s a socialist… well, then you still need another gimmick.

Or he could be the guy without a gimmick. He could be a plain old liberal, from back in the days when liberals were wrong and destructive, but not obviously crazy. He could be the voice of substance and reason in an increasingly unhinged party.

But then he wouldn’t be Joe Biden. And he’d still have the problem with the hands.

There are 27 comments.

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  1. dnewlander Coolidge
    dnewlander
    @dnewlander

    The problem on Biden’s hands is that he is handsy.

    • #1
  2. Saint Augustine Member
    Saint Augustine
    @SaintAugustine

    Does plagiarism count as a gimmick?

    • #2
  3. She Member
    She
    @She

    I remember those ads!  And yes, the trouble today is that the “in group” to which everyone aspires to belong is largely a bunch of freaks, and the relatively normal guy looks like the nutcase.  (I use the term “relatively normal” with some caution in this scenario, with reference to Uncle Joe, and I find his attempts make himself “relevant,” beyond cringe-worthy).

    This post reminded me of a Monty Python sketch called Spot the Loony.  I can’t find it on YouTube (looks like it’s been pulled), but here’s a script from one of them.   An outtake:

    Presenter (Eric Idle): And welcome to ‘Spot the Loony’, where once again we invite you to come with us all over the world to meet all kinds of people in all kinds of places, and ask you to . .. Spot the Loony!

     . . . describes several people such as “Gurt Svensson, the Swedish mammal abuser and part-time radiator” . . .

    Presenter: And we’ll be inviting them to… Spot the Loony. (a phone rings on the desk; he picks it up) Yes? Quite right … A viewer from Preston there who’s pointed out correctly that the entire panel are loonies. Five points to Preston there, and on to our first piece of film. It’s about mountaineering and remember you have to… Spot the Loony!

    Art cleverly prefiguring twenty-first century Democrat politics, it seems to me.

     

    • #3
  4. EJHill Podcaster
    EJHill
    @EJHill

    dnewlander: The problem on Biden’s hands is that he is handsy.

    Ana Navarro-Cárdenas, CNN’s Bushie-Turned-Trump-Basher, thinks Uncle Joe’s just fine. “(Biden) is way touchy-feely. Can make some feel uncomfortable. He needs to stop it,” she tweeted out last night. “But pls get back to me when +15 women say he sexually harassed them, or he boasts of grabbing a woman’s kitty-cat, or he pays hush-money to a stripper who reminds him of his daughter. I’ll wait.”

    So, guys, that’s good news, isn’t it? According to Ana the first 14 gropes are free!

    • #4
  5. Paul Erickson Inactive
    Paul Erickson
    @PaulErickson

    Maybe he could identify as a Camel smoker?  Though he’s probably in the wrong party for that.

    • #5
  6. Stina Member
    Stina
    @CM

    EJHill (View Comment):
    he pays hush-money to a stripper who reminds him of his daughter. I’ll wait.

    Whaaat?

    That’s where that went?

    I mean, Trump obviously has a type… and many daughters look like their mothers…

    So most decent husbands who adore their wives are schlepping women who look like their daughters.

    • #6
  7. Columbo Member
    Columbo
    @Columbo

    EJHill (View Comment):

    dnewlander: The problem on Biden’s hands is that he is handsy.

    Ana Navarro-Cárdenas, CNN’s Bushie-Turned-Trump-Basher, thinks Uncle Joe’s just fine. “(Biden) is way touchy-feely. Can make some feel uncomfortable. He needs to stop it,” she tweeted out last night. “But pls get back to me when +15 women say he sexually harassed them, or he boasts of grabbing a woman’s kitty-cat, or he pays hush-money to a stripper who reminds him of his daughter. I’ll wait.”

    So, guys, that’s good news, isn’t it? According to Ana the first 14 gropes are free!

    Funny. And … it’s 100’s for Joe, Ana, not 14. And one more thing … let us note that she is also giving creepy ‘Uncle’ Joe a pass on the age of the little girl/daughters that he gropes.

    • #7
  8. Stad Coolidge
    Stad
    @Stad

    Columbo (View Comment):

    EJHill (View Comment):

    dnewlander: The problem on Biden’s hands is that he is handsy.

    Ana Navarro-Cárdenas, CNN’s Bushie-Turned-Trump-Basher, thinks Uncle Joe’s just fine. “(Biden) is way touchy-feely. Can make some feel uncomfortable. He needs to stop it,” she tweeted out last night. “But pls get back to me when +15 women say he sexually harassed them, or he boasts of grabbing a woman’s kitty-cat, or he pays hush-money to a stripper who reminds him of his daughter. I’ll wait.”

    So, guys, that’s good news, isn’t it? According to Ana the first 14 gropes are free!

    Funny. And … it’s 100’s for Joe, Ana, not 14. And one more thing … let us note that she is also giving creepy ‘Uncle’ Joe a pass on the age of the little girl/daughters that he gropes.

    And on Drudge this morning:

    https://www.thecut.com/2019/03/an-awkward-kiss-changed-how-i-saw-joe-biden.html

    The legend keeps growing . . .

    • #8
  9. The Reticulator Member
    The Reticulator
    @TheReticulator

    Paul Erickson (View Comment):

    Maybe he could identify as a Camel smoker? Though he’s probably in the wrong party for that.

    These days they use drones to smoke the camels. But Biden could probably qualify as a drone.

    • #9
  10. Joshua Bissey Inactive
    Joshua Bissey
    @TheSockMonkey

    Stina (View Comment):
    So most decent husbands who adore their wives are schlepping women who look like their daughters.

    I think you mean “schtupping.”

    https://www.dictionary.com/browse/schlep

    https://www.dictionary.com/browse/schtupping

     

    Either way, the idea that “Stormy Daniels” is some kind of Ivanka Trump look-alike is so subjective, it’s a meaningless allegation. It’s possible the president thinks she looks like his daughter, but it’s much more likely a figment of a fevered, anti-Trump brain.

    • #10
  11. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

    Preface: I hold no brief for Biden. The criticisms of his beliefs and style are legion.

    Still….

    One has to question the judgement of his advisors or the man himself. He has a long record of liberal preferences. He was instrumental in the fights over Bork and Thomas. He served and was loudly supportive of Obama. He is a loyal Democrat with a perceived blue collar sensibility. Plus, he’s about as close as one can be to a Democrat Trump. He savaged Paul Ryan during the VP debate. He’s also a shameless prevaricator.

    Given the size of the Democrat field and the apparent concentration of candidates in the crazy quadrant, there is a clear avenue of approach for a moderate liberal. I assume there is an appetite among the Democrat leadership for a candidate who doesn’t scare the straights. I guess I should be pleased Biden still has the ability to miss an opportunity.

    • #11
  12. Stad Coolidge
    Stad
    @Stad

    Joshua Bissey (View Comment):
    Either way, the idea that “Stormy Daniels” is some kind of Ivanka Trump look-alike is so subjective, it’s a meaningless allegation.

    Stormy Daniels is a sex doll lookalike . . .

    • #12
  13. Hugh Member
    Hugh
    @Hugh

    He’s toast.  It was inevitable in the new reality.

    • #13
  14. Muleskinner, Weasel Wrangler Member
    Muleskinner, Weasel Wrangler
    @Muleskinner

    I knew that Nebraska Tourism’s slogan, “Honestly, it’s not for everyone,” had to be copied from somewhere. I’d forgotten about the Camel ads. 

    • #14
  15. Gary Robbins Reagan
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    EJHill (View Comment):

    dnewlander: The problem on Biden’s hands is that he is handsy.

    Ana Navarro-Cárdenas, CNN’s Bushie-Turned-Trump-Basher, thinks Uncle Joe’s just fine. “(Biden) is way touchy-feely. Can make some feel uncomfortable. He needs to stop it,” she tweeted out last night. “But pls get back to me when +15 women say he sexually harassed them, or he boasts of grabbing a woman’s kitty-cat, or he pays hush-money to a stripper who reminds him of his daughter. I’ll wait.”

    So, guys, that’s good news, isn’t it? According to Ana the first 14 gropes are free!

    Good for Ana!  She is quite the spitfire!

    • #15
  16. Stina Member
    Stina
    @CM

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    EJHill (View Comment):

    dnewlander: The problem on Biden’s hands is that he is handsy.

    Ana Navarro-Cárdenas, CNN’s Bushie-Turned-Trump-Basher, thinks Uncle Joe’s just fine. “(Biden) is way touchy-feely. Can make some feel uncomfortable. He needs to stop it,” she tweeted out last night. “But pls get back to me when +15 women say he sexually harassed them, or he boasts of grabbing a woman’s kitty-cat, or he pays hush-money to a stripper who reminds him of his daughter. I’ll wait.”

    So, guys, that’s good news, isn’t it? According to Ana the first 14 gropes are free!

    Good for Ana! She is quite the spitfire!

    She’s defending Handsy. Does consistency matter to you at all?

    • #16
  17. Henry Racette Member
    Henry Racette
    @HenryRacette

    Stina (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    EJHill (View Comment):

    dnewlander: The problem on Biden’s hands is that he is handsy.

    Ana Navarro-Cárdenas, CNN’s Bushie-Turned-Trump-Basher, thinks Uncle Joe’s just fine. “(Biden) is way touchy-feely. Can make some feel uncomfortable. He needs to stop it,” she tweeted out last night. “But pls get back to me when +15 women say he sexually harassed them, or he boasts of grabbing a woman’s kitty-cat, or he pays hush-money to a stripper who reminds him of his daughter. I’ll wait.”

    So, guys, that’s good news, isn’t it? According to Ana the first 14 gropes are free!

    Good for Ana! She is quite the spitfire!

    She’s defending Handsy. Does consistency matter to you at all?

    Stina, I think Gary was just expressing the general enthusiasm of our sex for a greater license to practice toxic masculinity.

    I mean, that’s how I read the comment. ;)

    • #17
  18. Randy Weivoda Moderator
    Randy Weivoda
    @RandyWeivoda

    It’s not just women Biden can’t keep his hands off of.

    • #18
  19. tigerlily Member
    tigerlily
    @tigerlily

    Camel Filters? Those musta been for wusses. Real men smoked plain ol’ Camels with nothing to get in the way of all that good tar on its’ way to the lungs, like the following;

    1933 World Champion New York Giants

     

    1934 World Champion St Louis Cardinals

     

    1950’s No. 1 Box Office Star John Wayne

     

     

    • #19
  20. dnewlander Coolidge
    dnewlander
    @dnewlander

    tigerlily (View Comment):

    Camel Filters? Those musta been for wusses. Real men smoked plain ol’ Camels with nothing to get in the way of all that good tar on its’ way to the lungs, like the following;

    1933 World Champion New York Giants

     

    1934 World Champion St Louis Cardinals

     

    1950’s No. 1 Box Office Star John Wayne

     

     

    I have smoked a couple of Camels in the probably two dozen cigarettes I’ve smoked in my life.

    The last word I’d use to describe them is “mild”.

    • #20
  21. Saint Augustine Member
    Saint Augustine
    @SaintAugustine

    dnewlander (View Comment):

    I have smoked a couple of Camels in the probably two dozen cigarettes I’ve smoked in my life.

    How is the internet not filled with more memes about “smoking camels” in the sense of barbecue?

    At least there’s this “smoking camels” picture from here.

    Funny Pictures of Smoking Camels

    • #21
  22. Gary Robbins Reagan
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    dnewlander (View Comment):

    tigerlily (View Comment):

    Camel Filters? Those musta been for wusses. Real men smoked plain ol’ Camels with nothing to get in the way of all that good tar on its’ way to the lungs, like the following;

    1933 World Champion New York Giants

     

    1934 World Champion St Louis Cardinals

     

    1950’s No. 1 Box Office Star John Wayne

     

     

    I have smoked a couple of Camels in the probably two dozen cigarettes I’ve smoked in my life.

    The last word I’d use to describe them is “mild”.

    Of course, John Wayne died of cancer.  John Wayne’s last film was “The Shootist” where he was a gun-slinger who was dying of cancer.  Jimmy Stewart was the doctor.  It is widely thought that he knew that he had cancer when he made the film.

    • #22
  23. toggle Inactive
    toggle
    @toggle

    EJHill (View Comment):
    Ana Navarro

    CNN’s Navarro files nails during immigration debate with Trump ally

    Give her credit for being consistent in how not to be taken seriously.

    • #23
  24. Chris Campion Coolidge
    Chris Campion
    @ChrisCampion

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    dnewlander (View Comment):

    tigerlily (View Comment):

    Camel Filters? Those musta been for wusses. Real men smoked plain ol’ Camels with nothing to get in the way of all that good tar on its’ way to the lungs, like the following;

    1933 World Champion New York Giants

     

    1934 World Champion St Louis Cardinals

     

    1950’s No. 1 Box Office Star John Wayne

     

     

    I have smoked a couple of Camels in the probably two dozen cigarettes I’ve smoked in my life.

    The last word I’d use to describe them is “mild”.

    Of course, John Wayne died of cancer. John Wayne’s last film was “The Shootist” where he was a gun-slinger who was dying of cancer. Jimmy Stewart was the doctor. It is widely thought that he knew that he had cancer when he made the film.

    Golly!  So informative.

    • #24
  25. Muleskinner, Weasel Wrangler Member
    Muleskinner, Weasel Wrangler
    @Muleskinner

    Chris Campion (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    dnewlander (View Comment):

    tigerlily (View Comment):

    Camel Filters? Those musta been for wusses. Real men smoked plain ol’ Camels with nothing to get in the way of all that good tar on its’ way to the lungs, like the following;

    1933 World Champion New York Giants

     

    1934 World Champion St Louis Cardinals

     

    1950’s No. 1 Box Office Star John Wayne

     

     

    I have smoked a couple of Camels in the probably two dozen cigarettes I’ve smoked in my life.

    The last word I’d use to describe them is “mild”.

    Of course, John Wayne died of cancer. John Wayne’s last film was “The Shootist” where he was a gun-slinger who was dying of cancer. Jimmy Stewart was the doctor. It is widely thought that he knew that he had cancer when he made the film.

    Golly! So informative.

    Try smoking 5 to 6 packs a day, and then film a movie 140 miles downwind from an above ground nuclear test site. John Wayne was so tough that Chuck Norris tells John Wayne jokes.

    • #25
  26. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

    Muleskinner, Weasel Wrangler (View Comment):

    Chris Campion (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    dnewlander (View Comment):

    tigerlily (View Comment):

    Camel Filters? Those musta been for wusses. Real men smoked plain ol’ Camels with nothing to get in the way of all that good tar on its’ way to the lungs, like the following;

    1933 World Champion New York Giants

     

    1934 World Champion St Louis Cardinals

     

    1950’s No. 1 Box Office Star John Wayne

     

     

    I have smoked a couple of Camels in the probably two dozen cigarettes I’ve smoked in my life.

    The last word I’d use to describe them is “mild”.

    Of course, John Wayne died of cancer. John Wayne’s last film was “The Shootist” where he was a gun-slinger who was dying of cancer. Jimmy Stewart was the doctor. It is widely thought that he knew that he had cancer when he made the film.

    Golly! So informative.

    Try smoking 5 to 6 packs a day, and then film a movie 140 miles downwind from an above ground nuclear test site. John Wayne was so tough that Chuck Norris tells John Wayne jokes.

    5 packs a day? That’s some dedicated chain smoking. 

    • #26
  27. unsk2 Member
    unsk2
    @

    But,but,but ………….wasn’t Slo Joe leading in the polls?

    The real question is ‘who took him out’? I know, I know, long time coming. 

    • #27
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