Gillette Is Not Wrong

 

Is the new Gillette razor ad a radical feminist attack on masculinity – the commercial embodiment of a woke sensibility? I was prepared to think so. But having watched it twice, I find a lot to like. The ad has been panned by some conservative commentators. With all due respect, I think they are falling into a trap. They seem to have accepted the feminist framing. Feminists see culture as a Manichean struggle. It’s women versus men. Women are benign and men are malign. For society to progress, men must change. We must extirpate “toxic masculinity.”

Understandably, this rubs conservatives the wrong way. I’ve risen to the defense of masculinity many times myself. But is the Gillette ad really “the product of mainstream radicalized feminism—and emblematic of Cultural Marxism,” as Turning Point USA’s Candace Owen put it? Is it part of “a war on masculinity in America,” as Todd Starnes argued on Fox News?

Conservatives stripping off their coats to get into this brawl are like the man who, seeing a barfight unfold, asks “Is this a private quarrel or can anyone join in?”

Let’s figure out what the fight is about before taking sides.

There were a couple of undercurrents in the Gillette ad that suggested feminist influence – the term “toxic masculinity” should itself be toxic – but overall, the ad is pretty tame, even valuable. I have no idea if it’s the best way to sell razors, but as social commentary, it’s not offensive. “The Best Men Can Be” begins by showing men looking the other way as boys fight, shrugging “boys will be boys.” It shows men laughing at a comedy portraying a lout pantomiming a lunge at a woman’s behind. It shows kids teasing a boy for being a “freak” or a “sissy.” These are followed by more uplifting images of men breaking up fights, interfering with men who are harassing women, and being loving fathers to daughters. We hear a quote from former NFL star Terry Crews, saying “Men need to hold other men accountable.” These images didn’t strike me as a reproof of masculinity per se, but rather as a critique of bullying, boorishness, and sexual misconduct.

By reflexively rushing to defend men in this context, some conservatives have run smack into an irony. Imaging themselves to be men’s champions, they are actually defending behavior, like sexual harassment and bullying, that a generation or two ago conservatives were the ones condemning. Sexual license, crude language, and retreat from personal responsibility were the hallmarks of the left. It was to epate la bourgeoisie that leftists chanted “Up against the wall, [expletive]” on college campuses. Liberals were the crowd saying “Let it all hang out,” “If it feels good, do it,” and “chaste makes waste.” Feminists were the ones eyeing daggers at men who held chairs or doors for them, and insisting that a “woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”

The left won that cultural battle. Standards of conduct for both sexes went out the window. Whereas men had once been raised to behave themselves in front of women — “Watch your language, there are ladies present” – they were instead invited to believe that women deserved no special consideration at all.

As I’ve written many times, the MeToo movement may conceive of itself as a protest of “traditional masculinity,” but that’s only because memories are short. It’s actually a protest against the libertine culture the sexual revolution ushered in. Some men are behaving really badly – harassing women, bullying each other, and failing in their family responsibilities. Some women are too, though the MeToo movement doesn’t acknowledge that aspect of things.  But these behaviors are not “traditional.” They’ve always existed, of course, but they went mainstream with the counterculture, which is now the culture. In any case, everyone, left and right, who values decent behavior should be able to agree that encouraging men to be non-violent, polite, and respectful is not anti-male. It’s just civilized.

Conservatives should applaud that aspect of the Gillette message. Progressives, in turn, should grapple with the overwhelming evidence that the best way to raise honorable men is with two parents. We may wish it were otherwise, but fathers — as disciplinarians, role models, and loving husbands — are key to rearing happy, healthy, and responsible sons, as well as self-confident, happy, and high-achieving daughters.

That’s the cultural reform we so badly need. Any corporate volunteers? Apple? Google?

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  1. Tom Meyer, Common Citizen Member
    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen
    @tommeyer

    One point I wanted to add. Our society has (at least) two problems relating to masculinity:

    1. Too much bad/toxic masculinity.
    2. Too little positive masculinity.

    The Gillette commercial made a strong statement against #1. It made a confused statement about positive masculinity.

    • #31
  2. Barfly Member
    Barfly
    @Barfly

    toggle (View Comment):
    Is it just the weather ? Or is masculinity different in different places ? Is it OK to whistle ?

    No. Yes. Yes if you’re a recognized-but-we’re-too-weak-to-say-it barbarian.

    • #32
  3. Terry Mott Member
    Terry Mott
    @TerryMott

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    One point I wanted to add. Our society has (at least) two problems relating to masculinity:

    1. Too much bad/toxic masculinity.
    2. Too little positive masculinity.

    The Gillette commercial made a strong statement against #1. It made a confused statement about positive masculinity.

    Looked to me like it made no attempt to distinguish between the two, but then again, I bailed before seeing the whole thing.

    • #33
  4. Manny Coolidge
    Manny
    @Manny

    Nonsense.  That ad presupposes that the majority of men are creeps and bullies.  What rot.  No time to write a full opinion, but I could not disagree more with the OP.

    • #34
  5. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    The ad is a load of feminist bilge. So was the Audi Superbowl ad. If you actually believe there was nothing so bad about the Gillette ad, you’re the frog in the slowly boiling water. I recommend getting out of that pot.

    • #35
  6. Vance Richards Inactive
    Vance Richards
    @VanceRichards

    Is bullying really a masculine trait, toxic or otherwise? I mean, have you ever seen teenaged girls in action?

    • #36
  7. Stina Inactive
    Stina
    @CM

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    Gillette is wrong in that they got into their heads the presumption that their job was to create a better sort of man.

    That is not their job. In actuality, their only job –the sole thing that justifies the corporation’s existence– is to create sharp little bits of steel and to sell those exorbitant scraps of metal to a man regardless of his moral standing.

    In fact, if they can manage to succeed in commerce honestly, they will be doing more to make the world a better place than a thousand of these indulgent “better men” campaigns.

    I’d like to see them take on toxic femininity which actually rejects the use of their products.

    Chivalry, standing up for women, yada yada yada… I thought feminists killed those decades ago.

    They kicked good men out of their homes, thinking they could raise boys into better men. All they managed were Verizon’s pajama boy who wouldn’t know how to stand against the tide while tied to a pylon.

    They removed all male-only hang outs, forcing men to either be guarded 24/7 or relax in mixed company with disastrous results. Women – how would you like men demanding you be your absolute best, 24/7 with nowhere to cut loose? Oh, that’s right. It is the new social requirement that women can be as crass, rude, domineering, emasculating, and lazy as they want while men are tied into straight jackets.

    And then we get to rub men’s faces in it.

    My dad is a good man. My grandfather was a good man. My father in law is a good man. This society isn’t making them “better”. Its making them worse.

    • #37
  8. Tom Meyer, Common Citizen Member
    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen
    @tommeyer

    Terry Mott (View Comment):

    Looked to me like it made no attempt to distinguish between the two, but then again, I bailed before seeing the whole thing.

    The commercial ends with several guys doing more positive things: breaking up fights, chasing away bullies, stopping cat-calling, one dad teaching his daughter to be strong, etc.

    I have some problems with these choices, but it’s hardly the direct assault on masculinity Michelle Malkin made it out to be.

    • #38
  9. Henry Racette Member
    Henry Racette
    @HenryRacette

    I’m a dad and I appreciate the “good dad” moments in the commercial. I think that is a message we should do more to advance. We could start by saying crazy things like “fathers are important, and kids are better off having both a mother (ergo, female) and a father (ergo, male) in the home, if that’s possible.” But it’s always nice to see men being protectors, and I loved the image of the little boy appreciating watching his father rise to the defense of someone else: hero worship of dads is beautiful.

    The one line I found most irritating was this:

    “But something finally changed … [collage of #metoo and toxic masculinity stories] … and there will be no going back.”

    Other than for a handful of high-profile abusers, nothing has really changed. Women remain cheap and easy — just like men have always been. Because that is the inevitable effect of telling people that men and women are the same and that they should act the same. In fact, that’s the inevitable effect of pretending that men and women are equal, with equivalent strengths and interests and vulnerabilities.

    I have five grown sons, and I think every one of them has a good idea of what it means to be a man, and to be a good man. I have one daughter, in her first year of college. She knows what I think men and women are supposed to be. But I worry about what she’ll find out there and, more, about what our culture will try to make of her.

    • #39
  10. Ed G. Member
    Ed G.
    @EdG

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):
    (confused, ham-hammed, and unsuccessful)

    mmmmmmm…… ham-ham. Is that like a ham sandwich with ham slices instead of bread slices? Much better than ham-hands any day.

    Maybe I’ll dust off the ol’ bbq grill and get some slow and low ham roast going tonight. I can’t promise to chant, but if my buddy comes over I won’t be opposed to a punch off. Who will tap out first? Well, I’m not a sissy so it won’t be me. My arm will fall off before I tap out, at which point I’ll be literally incapable of tapping out. If my wife should happen to sashay by me I’ll definitely grope her whether she’s in the mood or not; the coupla few beers I’ll have downed by then practically guarantee it. 

    • #40
  11. Tom Meyer, Common Citizen Member
    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen
    @tommeyer

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    One point I wanted to add. Our society has (at least) two problems relating to masculinity:

    1. Too much bad/toxic masculinity.
    2. Too little positive masculinity.

    The Gillette commercial made a strong statement against #1. It made a confused statement about positive masculinity.

    Dammit, I forgot to get to my main point: Our culture suffers more from a lack of positive masculinity than from an over-abundance of negative masculinity.

    And yes, our culture would benefit a lot from occasionally having discussions about positive/negative femininity.

    • #41
  12. DrewInWisconsin Member
    DrewInWisconsin
    @DrewInWisconsin

    Meanwhile, over at Schick, they’re not letting this opportunity go to waste.

     

    (Okay, that’s an old one. But I saw one today that just said “Schick. No Lectures”)

    • #42
  13. Tom Meyer, Common Citizen Member
    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen
    @tommeyer

    Henry Racette (View Comment):

    I’m a dad and I appreciate the “good dad” moments in the commercial. I think that is a message we should do more to advance. We could start by saying crazy things like “fathers are important, and kids are better off having both a mother (ergo, female) and a father (ergo, male) in the home, if that’s possible.” But it’s always nice to see men being protectors, and I loved the image of the little boy appreciating watching his father rise to the defense of someone else: hero worship of dads is beautiful.

    100%

    • #43
  14. Terry Mott Member
    Terry Mott
    @TerryMott

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    Terry Mott (View Comment):

    Looked to me like it made no attempt to distinguish between the two, but then again, I bailed before seeing the whole thing.

    The commercial ends with several guys doing more positive things: breaking up fights, chasing away bullies, stopping cat-calling, one dad teaching his daughter to be strong, etc.

    All of which are things that women also do, that require no masculinity.

    • #44
  15. Stina Inactive
    Stina
    @CM

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    The commercial ends with several guys doing more positive things: breaking up fights, chasing away bullies, stopping cat-calling, one dad teaching his daughter to be strong, etc.

    I have some problems with these choices, but it’s hardly the direct assault on masculinity Michelle Malkin made it out to be.

    The assault is the implication that men in general weren’t like those shining moments before #MeToo.

    Good job, feminists! It shouts. You domesticated men without giving the “til death”, while still promoting abortion over motherhood, and claiming men aren’t needed in the household!

    Helloooo…  the conservative argument is that good men were always needed to raise good men in a loving relationship with the child’s mother.

    This commercial says women just need to keep being pussy hat wearing harridans and browbeat and guilt men into village raising the collective offspring. But only teach the little bits we approve of.

    • #45
  16. Tom Meyer, Common Citizen Member
    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen
    @tommeyer

    Terry Mott (View Comment):

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    Terry Mott (View Comment):

    Looked to me like it made no attempt to distinguish between the two, but then again, I bailed before seeing the whole thing.

    The commercial ends with several guys doing more positive things: breaking up fights, chasing away bullies, stopping cat-calling, one dad teaching his daughter to be strong, etc.

    All of which are things that women also do, that require no masculinity.

    Hence, my next sentence:

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    I have some problems with these choices, but it’s hardly the direct assault on masculinity Michelle Malkin made it out to be.

    • #46
  17. Stina Inactive
    Stina
    @CM

    DrewInWisconsin (View Comment):

    Meanwhile, over at Schick, they’re not letting this opportunity go to waste.

    (Okay, that’s an old one. But I saw one today that just said “Schick. No Lectures”)

    Well its official. Good bye, Venus. I’m now made of Silk.

    • #47
  18. Misthiocracy secretly Member
    Misthiocracy secretly
    @Misthiocracy

    DrewInWisconsin (View Comment):
    Okay, that’s an old one. But I saw one today that just said “Schick. No Lectures”…

    … except at Indiana State University where they’ve hosted the Schick Lecture Series for 30 years.

    ;-)

    • #48
  19. Bryan G. Stephens Thatcher
    Bryan G. Stephens
    @BryanGStephens

    Moderator Note:

    borderline profanity

    Of course who do women actually sleep with? Who do women leave their beta male husbands for? Who gets all the women in this world?

    Bad boys do. Horrible men. #Metoo is a joke. Women will keep jumping into bed with the hot guys who are bad and edgy. 

    Alpha [redacted] and Beta pays the bills. 

    But I am sure that Mona refuses that knowledge. 

    If you have taken the Red Pill, you know what I mean. 

    I will say this: No suprise that NT = Caving to the Feminists. Just follows.

    • #49
  20. Tom Meyer, Common Citizen Member
    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen
    @tommeyer

    I want to make this very clear: I’m really not a fan of this commercial. I just don’t think it’s as bad as some people have made it out to be.

    Second — and here’s something we can likely all agree on — it’s an interesting and telling choice that the women and girls in the commercial are all either victims of bad men, or the recipient of good men’s behavior.

    Showing a female behaving poorly toward others? Showing a man stopping a girl or a woman from doing something unwise or immoral? Perish the thought!

    • #50
  21. Terry Mott Member
    Terry Mott
    @TerryMott

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    Terry Mott (View Comment):

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    Terry Mott (View Comment):

    Looked to me like it made no attempt to distinguish between the two, but then again, I bailed before seeing the whole thing.

    The commercial ends with several guys doing more positive things: breaking up fights, chasing away bullies, stopping cat-calling, one dad teaching his daughter to be strong, etc.

    All of which are things that women also do, that require no masculinity.

    Hence, my next sentence:

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    I have some problems with these choices, but it’s hardly the direct assault on masculinity Michelle Malkin made it out to be.

    You gave these as examples of positive masculinity in the ad.  My point is there’s little that’s masculine in your examples, leaving only the “toxic” masculinity of the straw-man examples earlier in the ad.  It’s not a stretch to take the ad as an overall attack on masculinity when the only positives are not masculine.

    • #51
  22. Henry Racette Member
    Henry Racette
    @HenryRacette

    Bryan G. Stephens (View Comment):

    Of course who do women actually sleep with? Who do women leave their beta male husbands for? Who gets all the women in this world?

    Bad boys do. Horrible men. #Metoo is a joke. Women will keep jumping into bed with the hot guys who are bad and edgy.

    Alpha [redacted] and Beta pays the bills.

    But I am sure that Mona refuses that knowledge.

    If you have taken the Red Pill, you know what I mean.

    I will say this: No suprise that NT = Caving to the Feminists. Just follows.

    Right?

    And guitar players. For the life of me, I can’t figure out what it is about guitar players.

    • #52
  23. Terry Mott Member
    Terry Mott
    @TerryMott

    Henry Racette (View Comment):

    Bryan G. Stephens (View Comment):

    Of course who do women actually sleep with? Who do women leave their beta male husbands for? Who gets all the women in this world?

    Bad boys do. Horrible men. #Metoo is a joke. Women will keep jumping into bed with the hot guys who are bad and edgy.

    Alpha [redacted] and Beta pays the bills.

    But I am sure that Mona refuses that knowledge.

    If you have taken the Red Pill, you know what I mean.

    I will say this: No suprise that NT = Caving to the Feminists. Just follows.

    Right?

    And guitar players. For the life of me, I can’t figure out what it is about guitar players.

    But I bet you can figure out why I learned the guitar and started a band as a teen.

    • #53
  24. Ed G. Member
    Ed G.
    @EdG

    Bryan G. Stephens (View Comment):

    Of course who do women actually sleep with? Who do women leave their beta male husbands for? Who gets all the women in this world?

    Bad boys do. Horrible men. #Metoo is a joke. Women will keep jumping into bed with the hot guys who are bad and edgy.

    Alpha effs and Beta pays the bills.

    But I am sure that Mona refuses that knowledge.

    If you have taken the Red Pill, you know what I mean.

    I will say this: No suprise that NT = Caving to the Feminists. Just follows.

    Maybe, sometimes. Good doesn’t have to equal boring. Bad doesn’t always equal thrilling. Being paternalistic isn’t good, and letting your attraction be known isn’t bad.

    • #54
  25. Manny Coolidge
    Manny
    @Manny

    Tom Meyer, Common Citizen (View Comment):

    Terry Mott (View Comment):

    Looked to me like it made no attempt to distinguish between the two, but then again, I bailed before seeing the whole thing.

    The commercial ends with several guys doing more positive things: breaking up fights, chasing away bullies, stopping cat-calling, one dad teaching his daughter to be strong, etc.

    I have some problems with these choices, but it’s hardly the direct assault on masculinity Michelle Malkin made it out to be.

    Those positive elements at the end were to suggest that those men are the anomalies not the general rule. You missed it if you don’t see and hear the tone and timbre of the commercial and that is that natural manhood is toxic. 

    • #55
  26. Stina Inactive
    Stina
    @CM

    Ed G. (View Comment):
    Maybe, sometimes. Good doesn’t have to equal boring. Bad doesn’t always equal thrilling. Being paternalistic isn’t good, and letting your attraction be known isn’t bad.

    Mystery, boundaries, and confidence are what I think are key there. Don’t over share, treat the women in your inner circle differently than you treat those outside it, and a woman you are interested in getting to know better, make it known with confidence while keeping the other two intact (a date acceptance doesn’t magically put her in the inner circle).

    • #56
  27. Bryan G. Stephens Thatcher
    Bryan G. Stephens
    @BryanGStephens

     

    LOL!

    Perfect!

    • #57
  28. Bryan G. Stephens Thatcher
    Bryan G. Stephens
    @BryanGStephens

    Henry Racette (View Comment):

    Bryan G. Stephens (View Comment):

    Of course who do women actually sleep with? Who do women leave their beta male husbands for? Who gets all the women in this world?

    Bad boys do. Horrible men. #Metoo is a joke. Women will keep jumping into bed with the hot guys who are bad and edgy.

    Alpha [redacted] and Beta pays the bills.

    But I am sure that Mona refuses that knowledge.

    If you have taken the Red Pill, you know what I mean.

    I will say this: No suprise that NT = Caving to the Feminists. Just follows.

    Right?

    And guitar players. For the life of me, I can’t figure out what it is about guitar players.

    The Feminization of our society continues.

     

    • #58
  29. Manny Coolidge
    Manny
    @Manny

    DrewInWisconsin (View Comment):

    Meanwhile, over at Schick, they’re not letting this opportunity go to waste.

    (Okay, that’s an old one. But I saw one today that just said “Schick. No Lectures”)

    I’ve always bought Gillette but perhaps my purchasing loyalties may have to change. 

    • #59
  30. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    toggle (View Comment):

    Dear Experts in Masculinity,
    I’ve lived in and visited countries where men whistle at girls. For example, was in a taxi in Rome when we passed by a ragazza on a scooter; the driver whistled, put his arm out, started pounding his hand on the side of the door, while with other, was honking the horn. He kept driving on, as she did too.
    Even today (even if not literally today, but literally nearly everyday), where I live, there are a lot of people not born in the US (most ?) who I hear whistle and honk at girls. Everyone moves on.
    Granted, I’ve noticed this where the weather is warm and the girls’ outfits hot, yet not so much where it is cold.
    Is it just the weather ? Or is masculinity different in different places ? Is it OK to whistle ?
    Signed,
    Man Confused, Seeking Answers

    To my mind, women humans like sexual attention when they want reassurance. Obviously some modes are better than others, but, as Oscar Wilde might have said, “it is better to be hit upon than not hit upon.” 

    • #60
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